Through the Dragon Age
by NeedleTowerLibrarian
Summary: Dying is already weird enough, but waking up in a fictional world! Never was I more grateful for my gaming during university. Armed with superior knowledge and fused with not one, but TWO spirits, I will certainly enjoy meddling with history. Thedas better be ready...
1. A glitch in reality

A/N

Welcome to my first Dragon Age story! Just as a general warning this story will become huge...like spanning all 3 Games huge. Main characters will be involved but not the general focus until maybe midway DA2 and I will read and appreciate any comments, kudos, reviews and recommendations. Even if you just want to complain ^^  
This story will include a lot of research i did on all the available sources on Thedas... I will however make use of artistic freedom.  
The first part will not include any romance unless you count mentions of certain characters, like for instance pessimistic egghead!

Also DISCLAIMER I do not own any of the recognizable stuff, you know what I'm talking about! Thank Bioware and the fantastic people working for them

Enjoy!

When someone asks you: "Where do you see yourself 5 years from now?" most people would not expect: "Running a secret organization with the aim of reclaiming racial independence or creating an autonomous state." as a serious answer. And yet that is where I found myself 5 years after my death.  
Yes, you heard correctly, AFTER my death. I honestly do not know what to tell you. It just happened and despite many good theories I never truly found out how or why it happened.

I was walking back home from the tube station. One of the houses in my street had some reconstruction going on. I passed it as I did every evening when something heavy, cold and blunt hit me full force in the head.  
My last thought was 'OUCH!' … I know, I know very profound stuff.  
After that my world turned black.

My awareness returned in small flashes. It felt more like a dream under the influence of a double dose of Valium. All I remember is being surrounded by a green haze, floating rocks and glowing crystals, also gravity was everywhere.

The time I "properly" woke up I was in a dark place. Literally. It was different from the total blackness of unconsciousness and the dream state. Squinting my eyes I could make out the barest hint of light. I felt like I was still floating. A part of me was still not sure if this was even real. My first look around was almost too dark to make out anything of use. 

The room I found myself in was small but had a high ceiling. The cold and dampness should have been chilly but I felt fine. Every surface in my visual field seemed to be the same dark grey stone. It must have been smooth once but it looked more like a crumbling old ruin than anything else. Also there was nobody around. No telltale TV or Radio noises or chattering of small groups of people in the background. All I could hear was echoing dip-drops of water. This meant this was no hospital, which was really the only place I thought I might wake up in.

Sitting around would not help me so I sat up and immediately I thought 'Bad idea!' Disorientation hit me, hard. I could barely feel my own body. I could not make out whether I was standing on solid ground or on a wobbly waterbed surface. This would take some getting used to. Tentatively I took some steps forward and nearly did a face plant. Mental note to myself 'Do not walk if you cannot feel your legs move, too much of a gamble.'

But then I could not just stand around in the same spot for eternity, could I? Had I been kidnapped after being knocked out? It seemed the only logical explanation.

Was I still asleep or hallucinating? My surroundings seemed real enough but I could swear I heard music in the background. It was faint and seemed to be coming from everywhere.

Despite my situation I felt deceptively calm. I had always been an emotionally well-balanced individual before… well whatever this is. Should I panic? No. Panic was counterproductive. I could not afford it. I wanted to pace. Walking always facilitated me in bringing order to my occasionally chaotic mind. So I paced slowly, following along the wall. Several rounds later I felt a little better. Also I finally did not feel like falling over anytime I took a step. The less you think about it the more your body supplies you with automated movements.

It was time to leave this little room to get some information.  
Where was I? Was someone else here with me? If yes, friend or foe? If no, what in the blazes was I supposed to do?

No answers would be found in this cubicle of a room so I should venture onward into the unknown.

Hesitation was the only thing which stopped me. I had seen enough horror movies to know where walking down dark, empty corridors got you. However it is also said: Nothing ventured nothing gained.

I stepped out into a … hallway, big surprise. The walls were from the same stone as before. I had a bit more light here as it shimmered through cracks in the ceiling where a big tree root dug into and through the stone. Must be one big tree. 

The light made it possible to take in more details of my surroundings. It was still quite dark, but at least I had discernible greyscale and not only 'dark' and 'beyond dark' to describe this place. I was incorrect in assuming that everything was made from smooth stone. When I had a closer look at the wall to my right I could make out finer details. Someone had carved beautiful patterns into the stone. In some areas there were squiggles on the wall that must have been script of some kind, though none that I have ever seen. Though much of it was worn off. This place must be relatively old if masonry was worn down as much and a tree grew through the ceiling. Maybe an old ruin? Now I felt like I was accidentally starring in Tomb Raider or Indiana Jones. 

As I placed my hands against the stone to feel the pattern I felt as though something was not right with what I was seeing. An odd feeling that something was very wrong without knowing what it was. I started to glare at the wall in frustration when it hit me like a ton of bricks and I did a double, no triple take of my hand… which I could see through faintly.

I was shocked, then fascinated. In order to find out more I held it against the light to see what happened. It was like looking through milky glass. I could see the outline of my fingers and my wrist and arm, but I could also see through my hand and make out the shape of the tree root. Curious I looked down.  
My body was the same, though I realized with some relief I seemed to be clothed as I was before I had my head smashed in.

I was a ghost! Or not really as I could not phase through walls, or float or anything else that would have been cool. On the other hand I did not feel solid either. I felt in between, which did not make a lot of sense. And that is when I finally grasped that I was dead, and transparent and very lost, somewhere. Before I could lose my cool, my logic decided to step in: Could I change anything?

There was nothing to be done about my death, it had happened. I did not even know how I was a transparent specter so nothing to be done about that either. The only changeable variable was my spatial unawareness. And so my brain put the phenomenon of my death on lower priority and declared denial my new best friend. As a consequence I put all my remaining energy into resolving my state of disorientation by getting un-lost as soon as possible. Exploration here I come!

While I walked down the hallway I had to dodge all kinds of rubble on the ground. The stone should facilitate echoes in a corridor like this, but my footsteps were silent. In the background I could hear the faint dripping sound of falling water. The whole ambiance seemed perfect for a ghost. Maybe I did belong here after all.  
As I walked it became increasingly bright. I decided to follow a small draft of air and finally stepped out into a brightly lit great hall. The center piece was a giant statue of a woman with draconic wings. It looked very impressive and reminded me of old shrines dedicated to gods and goddesses of the ancient civilizations. 

The light I had followed came from a huge gap in the ceiling. It was shimmering yellow and green, most likely reflecting from the many leaves of the trees growing up there. Water steadily fell down from the many roots reaching into the chamber. It gathered in a large pool around the statue.  
All around the room I found more miniature version of the dragon lady and dozens of owl statues. What at first looked like benches, were actually sarcophagi. Fantastic, I must be in some ancient mausoleum. I seem to fit right in as a dead person. Maybe there are more ghosts around. It did not sound as encouraging as I had hoped.

This hall turned out to be a dead end. However the presence of a skylight made it possible to guess the time of day and so I decided to make it my base. Any good video gamer knows base camps are important. Wonder if I could light a bonfire…what would be the odds…

From this hall onward I explored every room adjacent to the hallway. Many of them were filled with empty and destroyed bookshelves. Others had larger sarcophagi inside. Several of them were so destroyed I could not enter them. In the end I found a staircase. The way up was blocked by fallen debris, my only remaining option was going down. A route for another day, I decided. 

I returned to the hall and picked a dry corner to sleep. By now it was night out and barely any light shone from above. I sat down, closed my eyes and tried to relax. And I waited and waited. I tried counting sheep, which I had never done before. I hummed myself a lullaby. After my 2nd time of going over Mozart's "Eine kleine Nachtmusik" I decided to give up. Sleep would not come, no matter how long I waited. As I focused inward I noticed the music again. It had been unnoticeable as I focused on my surroundings but now in my introspective it became more prominent. The song was sad and beautiful in a haunting way. It could have made anyone smile in enjoyment and cry silent tears in reverie. I was alone with myself and the melody.

The thing about sitting down on your own and focusing inwards is: it gets you thinking. More and more I became aware of my non state of being. 

I should be tired. I was not.

I should be hungry and thirsty. I was not.  
I should be solid. I was not.

I should be dead. I WAS NOT.

I was WRONG.  
The music turned dark.

My mind continued to run in circles, again and again. I was brought out of my musings as the hall brightened once more. Daylight filtered in. The everyday normality of it stood in stark contrast with my own existence. I was an anomaly, unnatural, my brain would no longer comprehend my current state of being. Helplessness spread through me. For the very first time in my existence I did not know what to do with myself. I lacked explanation and purpose. Despair crept up to me and folded around me like a heavy, cold blanket. Then my instinct kicked in and screamed for the people that would have loved me and helped me out of any situation… my parents. And in answer to their absence I felt a very real sense of loss. There was no home and no family for me. I had no idea where I was, no discernible future, no purpose, nothingness. 

I felt as though I should cry, but I could not. This deep sadness settled into my bones. My grief and hopelessness made me feel heavier, darker. They spread through my veins like lead. I was dragged under by the weight into a cold place. It felt like drowning. As I allowed these feelings to weigh me down time lost all meaning. The abyss had me, held me.

Xx some time later? xX

The whirlwind of emotions did not pass easily. I would like to think a guardian angel swooped in and helped me find my path. That was not the case. In the darkest recesses of your mind you will inevitably stumble upon the core. The very origin of what makes you, YOU. I had found my soul. Its brightness was undimmed by what went on around it. It felt like the eye of the storm. No matter how much chaos surrounds you, within that part of yourself is absolute clarity. I hung onto that clarity like it was my one and only lifeline.  
Later I would resurface from the depths of my mind and be put out by my inability to find this clarity again. 

Logical thoughts drifted through my mind again. I was a ghost, emotions seemed to have a large influence on my non-physical state.  
'Heavy' felt more real, more here, but left me in a very dark, gloomy state of mind. Deep breaths, let it all disperse and I was calm again. For the next hour I kept on meditating to calm my breathing and my emotional state.  
When I felt no more heaviness I went through my existential crisis in rational steps.  
I was dead and shut off from all I knew. My family would be informed, they would grieve and hopefully move on with their lives. My friends would be shocked, but would continue on. My world did not need me anymore, maybe this one did. I will need a new purpose here. My first priority now was: Get more information! 

When I opened my eyes again it was dark again, but I felt brighter, light and free. Compared to the darkness within this sort of physical darkness had no effect on me any longer. Since I was not solving any problems sitting in a corner and it was not getting any brighter I resolved to continue my exploration. I could honestly not think of anything that could harm me in this state. I later found out that this line of thinking had been very naïve of me.

With one hand on the wall I made my way, step by step, through the darkness of the ruin until I reached the staircase. What greeted me 24 steps down was another system of tunnels full of rubble. Yay! Note the enthusiasm.

My eyes adjusted to the shadows slowly all the while I mapped the place out in my mind. It would not do to get lost later on. The more I saw of this place the more I felt like I was having a Deja-vu and I did not mean the fact that everything looked the same. Even though it did. My mind kept telling me I should recognize this place, but did not provide further clues as to from where. There was something familiar about the style of the ornaments and the figures and statues and I could not put my finger on it.

The oddity began to become annoying. Like having-a-word-on-the-tip-of-your-tongue-annoying.

The next staircase I found led upwards. My hope to find a way out of this place was dashed when the stairs abruptly ended in a wall of dirt. Another blockade on my way to freedom.  
I turned back and began mapping out side passages and rooms. On my way I noted several intact traps, which I did not trigger. I don't know if I even could. A few rooms gave of a creepy aura. The song was louder in those places and I felt heavier. It scared me. It felt like a breeze swirling through my essence, at which point I turned and left. Mental note: avoid these places.  
Apparently there was no exit available in this part of the ruin. I was cut off from the outside. Despite the large amount of room around me this place suddenly felt claustrophobic. I half ran, half stumbled back to my hall and decided to meditate some more. It could not hurt to keep calm and carry on.

My peaceful contemplation was disrupted by a flash and crack from above. The occasional drip of water from the root increased into a small continuous stream. Grumbling sounds and the fall of drops on many leaves could be heard from the opening in the ceiling. A thunderstorm raged above. For as long as it lasted I sat and enjoyed the new sounds and smells, which came with the storm. It took a long while for the weather to calm down. After the storm had passed the pool in front of me had transformed into a lake, high enough to reach my ankles. 

Indeed, the water flooded through every crack in the stone. As I made my way back to the stairs I discovered that the lower passages were flooded. I could not swim through this. As it turned out, I did not need to. My form passed through water with no resistance. A few hallways had collapsed, on other occasions a wall had come down and opened up new places to explore, which I relished in doing. The staircase, which had been a dead end was now free of debris. As I waded through the mud up the stairs the smell of ozone became stronger and stronger. The very air seemed charged by the lightning.  
I jogged down a last bit of hallway and up 5 slim steps and found myself out in the open. Freedom at last! 

Dark green surrounded me. The change in color was like a shock to my deprived senses. I stood in the dense thicket of a forest with very tall gnarly trees. The vibrant new colors almost drove me to tears. Until now I had not realized how stale the air below was. I enjoyed the fresh air, the scent of wet earth and grass and leaves, the faint breeze in my face and hair. It was addictive. New noises reached my ear, no echo of drops in stone halls. I heard owls hooting and leaves rustling and bleating of deer in the distance. The forest was alive and for the first time since my death I felt alive as well.

I remained in that spot for hours not moving beyond 10 feet in any direction. After I had absorbed my fill of life and marveling at the feeling of sunlight and moonlight on my translucent skin I moved. In order to not get lost I walked through the surrounding forest in concentric circles, spiraling outwards and back. I managed to identify a handful of tree types. On the other hand I did not recognize any of the shrubs or herbs I came across. They looked familiar, yet I could not name them.

Even though I did not want to imprison myself again, I went back underground. I wanted to check if the storm had opened up any interesting spaces within the tunnel system.  
Several more rooms had opened up, all of them emanating a sinister aura. One of the walls had come down and the path beyond led through several large caverns full of spider webs. _Gigantic_ spider webs. I did not wait to see how large the spiders had to be to spin this much thread.  
I jogged along and for the first time saw some actual corpses in this gravesite. Old corpses, simple skeletons in leather and heavier armor. Must be a very old grave. The armor and the bows and daggers looked positively archaic, not to say ancient. Obviously everything was in disrepair and yet the quality was such that some authentic details remained visible.

After I passed a hall full of skeletons I walked up into a greater hall. What caught my eye was a beautiful circular mosaic on the ground of the far side of the room. With single-minded focus I walked straight towards it until I stood just in front of it. So engrossed was I in the flowing pattern of shimmering colorful stone, that I squeaked and jumped in surprise when a low snort came from behind me. In panic I turned around with too much speed, slipped on the tiles and landed on the floor. How inconvenient to become a clumsy ghost the moment I needed to be alert.  
From my new perspective the creature in front of me seemed even taller to me.  
There on a pile of rubble and shiny gold coins sat a dragon. A fire breathing, snoring reptile, roughly the size of an SUV. Sweet merciful fate had decreed that my clambering, clumsy noises did not wake it.

The acceptance of the existence of the fire drake in front of me was the trigger for my next epiphany. The statues, the hallways, the dragon, the ruin in the forest…. It felt nostalgic! I had been here before so many times, yet never before in person. All of this was familiar through a computer screen while playing Dragon Age Origins. Following that line of thought I must now be in Thedas. I was in freakin THEDAS! I had to stop myself before my thoughts spun out of control. This was no place to have a moment of enlightenment!

I doubt the dragon could actually hear or smell me, but I did not feel comfortable having a picnic in front of it either. I snuck past him up the stairs through another hall full of webs (shiver) and out into a gigantic room, not unlike the foyer of an expensive hotel. Now that my brain had a reference and knew what to look for I immediately recognized this place. I was in the forest ruins in the Southeast of the Brecilian Forest in Ferelden.

For a moment I was happy to finally know WHERE I was, until I asked myself WHEN I was.

Canonically this place is introduced in DA:O, was I here before the Werewolves, or after? I have not seen any. And how long before or after? Maybe this was another age entirely. I could certainly pick from about 8. Maybe I could find more indicators. With any luck I might find a clan of Dalish elves, which would indicate anything after the fall of the Dales. I doubt any Dalish elf would talk to a spirit looking like I do. And I was a Spirit, not a Ghost! Although I was not an aspect of anything as far as I knew, not like Hope, Faith or Justice or Compassion. 

After making my way back outside I sat on a fallen tree trunk and tried to recall anything relevant from my obsessive (yes I admit it) game play of the Dragon Age Trilogy and me reading any related literature.  
Cole had been a spirit of compassion, but he made himself physical. If he could do it I could do it. So my next order of business: Get a body!


	2. Talking tree, lecturing lady and Hope

My first quest in Thedas had started and involved a lot of running.  
I left the ruins through the main entrance and meandered through the Brecilian forest. In my exploration of the wildlife I came across wolves (the normal dog sized version), bears (the not so normal Bus size version) and I had to dodge some Sylvans (tree possessing Spirit hooligans they are).

Every time I saw something distinctly enemy like I turned tail and ran, which left me thoroughly disoriented. The only reprieve I got was when I met my first Halla. The white shining deer of the elves were awe inspiring to watch. They held a kind of purity and grace, which you could not find elsewhere in the forest. They walked in groups a 3 to 4 and stopped occasionally to eat some grass or leaves. I followed them for a while and they let me. I did not know whether they could see or sense me. If they did they tolerated me.

I made note of all the plant life around me. Especially in the later games of Dragon age the herbs and poisonous plants were very distinctive collectibles around Thedas. I did my best to spot and recognize any Elfroot, Embrium, Prophet Laurel and Crystal Grace. It might come in handy later. I also took note of what the Halla ate and what they avoided. Forest dwelling animals knew poisonous plants better than anyone.

My trekking through the woods was harder than I imagined. I loved hiking in the mountains where you had clear sight and dozens of paths. As opposed to video game Thedas the forest did not offer up enough space to drive a car through. Wonder of wonders! There barely were any paths with the exception of some deer tracks for me to use. I fought my way through the thicket. While not tropical in nature this forest was quite a jungle. The tall trees with their high canopy gave the light, which filtered through a soft green tint. The growth on the ground ranged from two heads taller then I, to about ankle height. All was shaded and dark green.

My observation led to yet another clumsy incident when I fell over a tree root and tumbled down a steep incline. The only good thing about a spirit body is the lack of physical pain and needs. At least that is what I thought when I got my bearings back. Imagine my delighted surprise when I came face to knee (?) with a white oak tree sprouting orange leaves. After some creaking and cracking it shook itself and suddenly seemed to have two legs and arms.  
I was right. This was the ancient oak.

"Huhm? What manner of beast be thee  
that sits before this elder tree?"

My first conversation in Thedas would be with a rhyming tree. Fantastic…  
"I don't rightly know myself. Maybe I am a forest spirit?"

The tree looked at me a moment then replied.

"Your soul inside burns bright and hot,  
a forest spirit thou art not.  
A spirit, yes, but not from here,

From whence you came remains unclear."

"I come from beyond the Beyond. I know what was, is and will be." I can be cryptic too pal.

"A spirit then of fate be thee,

But are you bound or are you free?"

"I am unbound and unbowed, to borrow the words of someone else. As for fate, a dragon lady might think it chance instead. I am me and that is enough for now."  
The tree did a nodding movement, which shook some leaves off.

"In any case I welcome thee,

I am called the elder tree,

The oldest one I am around,

My spirit to this oak was bound…"

I am sure he would have presented the entire history of the forest to me in rhymes had I not stopped him. He was my only clue for temporal orientation.  
"Sorry to interrupt, elder tree, but have you seen a strange white wolf around, or two legged wolves or talked to any elves or travelers?"  
He took a moment to get his thoughts together after being interrupted and pelted with questions. He rather reminded me of a stage acting version of Middle-Earth Ents…huh…

"I know the wolf of which you speak,

It is Whitherfang you seek."

'Bingo!'

"Yes it is. I live in the ruins as well. As her new neighbor I thought it only polite to go and introduce myself."

"Mhm. She makes her home inside the halls  
where tree and water brought down walls.  
She holds her court with men turned beasts

Their frequency of late increased."

Another useful hint. So the Lady and her Werewolves were around and they were getting stronger. I must have dropped here just before the events of the 5th Blight. A shudder ran through me as I thought of meeting real life Darkspawn. That is not something I needed right now. Maybe the Lady of the Forest had an idea of what to do about me. She was a spirit bound to a wolf, and she was old and powerful. At the moment she was my best bet.

"Thank you for the news. I know my way from here. See you around E.T."

"Fare thee well." The creaking was back and a moment later the E.T. went stiff and still like a normal tree.

I turned around a new goal in mind. With a spring to my step I navigated my way back the way I came and by evening I stood back in front of the ruin entrance. Now that I had the time I took a moment to enjoy the sight of the ancient elvhen ruin in the low light of evening. As I stood and stared I could not shake the feeling of being watched. Were the wolves around already? Had they been here before when I came out of the ruin as well?

Instead of heading straight down to the lower ruins I turned right and down the stairs. At the end of the corridor stood a locked door. I suppose it would only be polite to knock so I did. I could hear shuffling steps behind the door but got no answer. I knocked again, louder this time. "Hello?!" my voice echoed up the hall. "I am looking for an audience with the Spirit of the Forest."

Still no answer. "You know I can hear you through the door right? You can also say 'No', but I will be back tomorrow… and the day after and again and.." I did not get to continue for the door was unlocked and I looked at the chest of a bipedal wolf. It was growling at me but did not seem aggressive. 2 more Werewolves stood behind him glaring me down as if to dissuade me with looks alone.

"You rrgggrhh are not a human." The one in front of me spoke.  
"I am a spirit like your Lady. I promise I will not make trouble I am just looking for guidance." In this case I felt honesty would serve me best.

"A spirit?! Hrrrhg Very well. You will be granted audience." He was about to turn but looked at me once more "If you should harm the Lady. Spirit or no we will tear you to shreds." The threat was empowered by his two companions' low growls in my direction. I felt intimidated enough to reduce my answer to a nod.

The 3 wolves went ahead and I followed meekly. Maybe I should have made a plan before jumping right into danger zone. More and more wolves joined my escort as we approached a well-lit hall. There on a round platform at the head of the hall sat a white wolf with old shining eyes. With no indication of her intentions she stalked towards me. Being the sole focus of a predator the size of a car was no joke.

I could not suppress the light trembling of my form as I held my breath and waited for my judgement. I had no delusions. She was appraising me, this was her first test, no doubt about it.

I tried to calm down. Whitherfang sniffed my form and cocked her head to the side. Something about me confounded her, I could see it in her eyes. Seemingly coming to a conclusion and being satisfied with the result, she turned back to the dais and in a green shimmer turned into her humanoid form.

Long ebony hair flowed from her head. Vines and tree roots were her only attire and her eyes still held the distinct yellow color and narrow pupil of the wolf. "Greetings childe." Her voice washed over me like a shower of warm summer rain. It was clear and smooth and left me in anticipation of her next words. Here was a being of power. However loath I was to disrupt the atmosphere with my own voice I was brought up to be polite so there.

"A pleasure to meet you."

A mysterious smile was on her face. "Is it really? We shall see. I have not met another being like you yet. What is your story and why have you come before me?"  
I recognized the question for the order it was.  
"I died my lady and woke up here, deep within your ruins."  
"They are not mine child. I simply use them for a time."  
"It still feels I should introduce myself to my neighbors."

She smiled again. "And?"

"Aaaand" I drew the sound out "you are the spirit of this forest. Old and powerful as you are I thought you could provide guidance for me as you have for them?" I nodded my head in direction of the wolves. I tried and most likely failed to sound nonchalant. If she could not help me I did not know how to continue.  
"They are connected to me in a way you are not." My desperation must have shown at those words for she continued softer than before "However I can help you. Come closer child of the beyond."

I took some steps closer. The wolves snarled but the Lady smiled encouragingly. As I stood before her she lifted her hands to my head and heart. A soft green glow began emanating from her form and I was engulfed in a swath of new sensations. I could feel a breeze smelling of fresh pine needles, moist earth and green grass. All the smells of the forest surrounded me. The moment I enjoyed the smell of mushrooms all of it suddenly disappeared. I had not even noticed that my eyes were closed until I looked straight into the Lady's eyes.

"You have a strong connection to the Fade, but you are no spirit. You did not originate in the Fade, rather you came into being by passing through it. My advice is to gather magical energies in places were the Veil is thin. It will make you more corporal than you are now. You could also just wait for a few decades for it to happen naturally. The choice is now yours child."

"Are there many such places around here?"  
"The entire forest has a bloody history. It weakened the Veil. There are plenty of places around to siphon the energy of the Fade."  
I nodded. "How do I do that?"

Now she looked at me in askance. "How do you siphon energy? Have you never used magic before? Your connection to the Fade should have given you the gift of the arcane."  
"There was no magic where I am from, milady."  
"I see. Unfortunately it will feel different form person to person. There is no shortcut to learning this and you have the time. Go seek out those places of power and try it out for yourself. Find your connection to the magic surrounding you and make it your own. When you have become part of this reality in full form and still wish to learn magic, come back here and I will teach you what I know."

The cryptic advice did not really help me but the prospect of learning magic from a Forest spirit improved my mood drastically. "Thank you! I will become more real and return to you!"  
"Until then, child."  
The lady turned back into Whitherfang and left. One of the wolves came forward. "Hrrgh follow me outsider." He/She(?) led me down a smaller corridor on the left. "This leads to the lower ruins. Start your search there." Huh well what do you know, they were actually helpful. I passed through the gate and down several flights of stairs. Just how deep underground is this place?

I figured my quest to gain a body was now in the next stage. I knew what to do now even though I had no idea how to do it yet. I shall see this as a science experiment and learn through trial and error.  
The way the Lady described me I was not part of this reality yet, but magic could make me. It seems like I needed to fill some metaphorical battery of magical energies, only I had no idea how to connect to the socket yet. Huh? Modern analogies did not make it any easier. I suppose the Fade and the Veil were concepts too abstract to really find a physical analogy that fit.

However from what I recall about it, the Veil becomes weaker when it is pulled apart from this side or pushed to the breaking point from the other side. This could happen because a) a mage used his/her power to sunder the Veil or b) many Spirits were attracted to a certain place because of many emotional events. I sadly did not have a Tevinter magister or Senior Enchanter of the Circle conveniently hidden away in my pockets so option b) would have to do.

This place had been a temple for those elves undergoing the long sleep, uthenera. That did not explain the many corpses in armor though, which made me wonder what happened here. With no indication of where to go I returned to my new all-time favorite thing to do in old musty ruins… exploring.

This part of the ruins seemed in more disrepair than the part I woke up in (if that was even possible). All over there were more rooms and more interconnecting hallways. There was also more water. In one room the water came down like a miniature waterfall through a crack in the ceiling. When I walked through it I did not get wet, I only felt a little chilled. Further down this corridor water had collected high enough to reach my knees, yet when I went through it did not even produce ripples on the surface. Being a non-entity was slightly creeping me out.

I got my first indication of magic when something in the air changed. It is hard to put in words, but it was as if the air was charged. Similar to the feeling of ozone and static in the air when there was a thunderstorm. Some kind of pressure was in the air. The song from when I woke up was audible now. Was this an indication of the fade? Background music playing in my head? Fantastic! Though I did recall Cole mentioning the 'old songs' or something. The Fade did not make sense.

In spite of my confusion excitement and anticipation gripped me and I moved on with more enthusiasm. I followed the feeling and it led me into a circular room to my right. An altar was hewn from the stone in the center of it. Not ominous at all… I made my way to the center and noticed that I was walking over fine lines on the ground. Something like a magic summoning circle? The residual energy was tangible. It would be good for my first ever siphoning attempt.

I had absolutely no clue how to even begin. Did I have to activate something? Maybe meditation would work? I sat on the ground and concentrated on the energy buzzing around me. I tried to get a feeling for its flow and pictured myself breathing it in and keeping it when breathing out. I visualized myself being filled up with it. Several hours passed and… Nothing happened…

Maybe I needed to connect to the Fade instead, but how do I find it. I could not even sleep. Why was there no convenient instructional handbook on it?! Magic for Dummies sounded tempting right about now.

In my frustration I stood up paced a bit and finally kicked the altar for good measure. Only to get something of a shock when I connected with it. Gods dammit! I thought I was immune to pain. Cautiously I reached out with my hand. I did not get shocked it did however feel a little like an electric current was running through me.

Could it be that easy? I was already connected to the Fade all I had to do was make physical contact? Only was it strictly physical if I was not physical? I was spectral so my imagined physical contact is actually not physical at all.

The mumbo jumbo made my head hurt. Eventually the feeling of the flow stopped and the charge in the air was gone. I had absorbed it all.

I did not feel much more substantial so I decided to move on.

The moment I walked through the next puddle I got my proof that something had changed.

I made ripples! My newly found discovery had me jumping into puddles like a 4 year old kid on a sugar rush. I needed more!

Over the course of the next (insert time here, I have no idea there is no sunlight down here) I absorbed more magic from a crystal construction, another altar, a bloodstain (creepy that), a little vial and a sarcophagus. Every time I could feel myself become _more_ … I felt heavier, my breathing became essential and I felt more and more exhausted the more I walked. My body became more consistent and lost its opacity. After the last bit of absorbing, I suddenly felt pain in my stomach. I was hungry again. Yay for magic!

What would happen if I gain my body and then die down here of starvation? This thought gave me motivation to turn back through the maze of tunnels. Now it was harder to traverse. I got wet and cold. My body started to shiver and my stomach growled. The lack of sleep made me feel light headed. If my body had not screamed for rest I would have screamed for joy of feeling like a normal person again.

Now that I was solid once more it was easier for me to recognize what was me and what was not. I could now distinctly feel my connection to the Fade. It was as though a bright green thread was attached to my mindscape and following it gave me the sense of a vast cloudy haze of energies and memories that were not my own. Exploring it in future dreams made me both excited and apprehensive. Enthusiasm was good, caution was better.

Eventually I reached the gate I had entered with the werewolf from before. I knocked, got no answer and decided to just walk straight through.  
The moment I was back in the hall I heard fast running footsteps. Not a minute later three werewolves stood in front of me. "You returned, outsider." He did not sound happy. "Yes I did."

"The Lady is out in the forest, you will wait for another audience." Another added.

"Fine by me." I decided not to take their attitude personally. They had a rough time of it and their worship of the Lady was their right, no need to antagonize them.  
My stomach decided to growl back at the wolves. "Could you spare some food?" I mumbled. This was embarrassing, why did this happen to me now of all times?

"Very well. Follow." The third and smallest of the 3 led me away. We entered a side chamber filled with furs and lit by the flame of a brazier in the middle of the room. "Wait here."  
The furs were soft enough to sit on them comfortably, but the stench was nauseating. The entire place reeked of wet dog and old food rests and unmentionable things. Ew!

I coped by not breathing through my nose as much. The wolf came back and dropped 2 dead hares in front of me. "Erm. Thank you?" He nodded then left to go sit in a corner. I looked at the two dead bunnies. I have eaten rabbit before, in a restaurant. Here in the wilderness I had not the first clue of how to prepare game though. From what I read in books you needed to skin them and take the innards out and then you could cook the stuff but…. How was I supposed to do that?

"Erm excuse me?" I tried getting the wolf's attention. "I do not know how to eat it like this…"  
The wolf came over and with his claws cleanly eviscerated the rabbits in front of me. The view of it and the new smell made me lose my appetite. "You know what never mind. You can have it." I crawled away from the slaughter and into a corner. Grabbing a fur for warmth I decided it was time for my first ever nap in Thedas. I could talk to the Lady about my food problem later.

Exhaustion took its toll and made me fall asleep fast. Surprisingly I gained back my awareness very fast. The blanket and the brazier was gone. The room was lit by floating crystals, which lined the wall and indistinct voices came from the hallway outside.  
I t took me a moment to gain my orientation back. I was in the Fade. Now that I was not a ghost anymore my connection to the Fade meant I would 'wake up' here every time I went to sleep from now on.

From my memory I could tell that this was not the raw Fade. No green sky was in sight, nor could I make out the Black city. This must be a memory of the Brecilian ruins. Judging from the look of it, the ruins were not ruins yet. Going out to explore the corridor I inspected the wall etchings and colorful tapestries in wonder. Despite its simplistic décor it was beautiful. Two braziers at the end of the hall were lit with blue whispering flames. "Veilfire…" the murmur of awe just escaped my mouth when I noticed a shadow moving on my right.

Nobody was in sight. I followed the movement nonetheless. Spatial reality did not seem to matter in the Fade, only intent. I knew there should be another corridor behind this door but instead I ended up in a chamber full of books. It was not big enough to be called a library, but still… I loved reading so I was doubly surprised to find that the books had actual text in them and I could not read them. As good with learning languages as I was, nobody could spontaneously read ancient elvhen script.

Disappointed I walked back out, to find myself in yet another hallway. This one was wider and colder than the one I came from. A long line split the wall etching in front of me. It looked as though someone had dragged something sharp over the surface with a lot of strength. The light dimmed. The line ended in a big splatter of blood. Fresh blood. The salty and slightly metallic smell filled my nose and I stumbled backwards. My hands braced against the opposite wall only to feel a wet, warm substance on my hands. I gave a high pitched squeal as I jumped back. The noise echoed down the hallway. Not good, absolutely not nice dream. This was a nightmare. My squeal did not echo back instead screams of pain reached me. What horror happened in this place?

My forehead broke out in cool sweat and I could feel my hairs raised to goosebumps. I wanted out. This is not how I pictured my first dream in Thedas to go. The screams stopped. I stumbled down the hall in the opposite direction of their origin.  
I came out in a hall glowing in soft blue light of the Veilfire.  
There was no blood and no screams here yet I could not help but feel uneasy. What more could this dream throw at me.

From the corner of my eye I noticed movement and twirled around to face it only to have the ghostly form of a she-elf in full armor rush past me. Her long blond hair was braided in the back. The armor clung tightly to her body and was bloodied by combat.  
She held two swords of elegant make in each hand, one of which was pointed forwards and up.

I followed the line it made to another form. A male elf in a long pristine robe of dark purple and velvety black patterns that swirled and never stood still enough to make out. His gaze was narrowed on the female as he clasped his hand behind his back. He was seemingly unconcerned about the threatening gesture of the she-elf and started to speak in low nasal tones. I could not understand a word, but his intonation was condescending and his gaze patronizing.

In reaction the female lowered the sword a little and snarled something back at him. Her voice angry, frustrated and yet her eyes held more sorrow than anything else.  
A short reply from the male had her shut up and put a blank look on her face. After a moment of silence she asked a question. His reply was swift and accompanied by hand gesture. She relaxed and put her sword down. He nodded.

I could not help but be fascinated by this exchange. Though I had no idea what the words meant I could still understand so much just from non-verbal cues alone. However I must have not understood enough for the next action of the male elf took me entirely by surprise. He snapped out a crystal from his folded robes, cut his palm with it and started chanting.

The she elf was as surprised as I was. It took her a moment to get into a fighting position, but it was already too late.

Mister purple robes threw the crystal in the air. Small glowing ribbons reached out from within it and ensnared the female. Her form glowed, a chant on her lips as if in a magical last defense and then the light of her eyes vanished and her body slumped down as though someone had cut a puppets strings.

The crystal glowed bright, then dimmed to an enchanting light blue hue. The elf plucked it out of the air with a satisfied smile (the slimy little bastard) and turned to leave. His form vanished from sight as did the ruin.

Whatever memory I had stumbled into was over and I now had the freedom to explore the Fade.

My mind conjured up the picture of a meadow in the woods and the Fade made it so. I sat down mentally exhausted from the terror and the imprisonment I had witnessed. My new surroundings were full of a sense of peace and life. The stark contrast to the blood splattered hallway helped offset any lingering negative emotions. I felt safe here and used a moment to just enjoy this place, however after a while I got the distinct impression of being watched. Please do not let this be a demon. Why did this always happen to me?

"You can come out you know. I know you are there." And I did. I could feel a presence at the edge of my meadow.  
"Hello? Can you hear me?" Mhm if whatever it was did not want to come out it would not.

I turned towards the sunlight and closed my eyes. The Fade was really incredible. I could feel the warmth on my skin even if it was not a real sun or even real skin. But then what constitutes as reality? Color, warm or cold, pain all were constructs of our brain. Without our mind interpreting our sensual input, nothing would exist to us.

On the other hand people have died of frostbite in defect freezers. While the room had a perfect 20 degrees Celsius the brain told them it was – 15 and consecutively they froze to death. The power of mind over the power of matter.  
My contemplations were interrupted by a little ball of light floating in to my vision to my left. Was it a wisp? The little blob of blueish light approached me cautiously. The closer it got the more familiar it felt. It exuded a wonderfully light and warm feeling. "You are spirit are you not? What kind of spirit are you I wonder?"

The little light became more animated in response to my inquiry. "So you understand me then. Can you talk with me as well?" It bobbed up and down in affirmation and transmitted a sense of glee. "You converse via empathy then? How fascinating."  
The spirit seemed happy at my easy acceptance. "Not many stop to talk to you do they? Lots of suspicious mage types around huh?" A sad resignation fell over the dimming light. "You know you feel very familiar. Do I know you from before?" The spirit trembled with shy embarrassed. "You must be a spirit I was very familiar with in life. Now after my death I finally get to experience such incredible things."

A deep regret emanated from the spirit. "Oh do not feel bad for me. I will be fine." Relief flooded the area. "Man your empathy sure creates a roller-coaster of emotions." Confusion spread through me. The more I experienced this type of communication the easier it got to make a distinction between my own emotions and those of my new friend. It was as if they had a unique flavor.  
"What is your sphere of influence here in the Fade? What do you represent to the world, my friend?"

A sort of recognition overcame the spirit and it vibrated excitedly.  
All of the sudden I felt sure of myself. My purpose was clear and my future was bright. Nothing can bring me down. Something within me was unshakable. What was this… "Confidence, no. Purpose…. Close but no" Suddenly I felt absolute desolation, nothing mattered, why continue my worthless existence?

It would be better to give up on life and then…a spark of "Hope!" My head snapped up to look at the spirit in front of me. So small and fragile and yet… "and yet hope is the last thing to be lost. Hard to find but impossible to kill." Hope glowed with delight in response to my reverent explanation.

"I suppose in extreme cases of hopelessness or if people are in desperate need they might misconstrue you as a demon of desire or despair." Hope shivered with sadness. "Oh no sorry I did not think about what I was saying. Sorry Hope. Urgh calling you hope all the time will get old fast. Need to come up with a name. Maybe just translating it will help. Epoir, Esperanza and Speranza sound too feminine. You feel more like a male."

Hope bobbled sideways in confusion to this. It must not be used to the concept of gender. "Wait I got it. In Greek there is Elpis. I'll just call you El for short. What do you think?" Happy bobble. "Okay, El it is." I sensed the surroundings waver slightly. "It seems I am waking up. Nice to meet you El. I hope to talk to you again soon." El agreed.

The Beyond faded to the background and I awoke. The first thing I became aware of was rancid breath in my face. My eyes opened to a werewolf snout in my face.  
"Whoa there!" This was the mother of all jumps scares man! The wolf was not bothered or I just could not read his face very well. Body language of bipedal wolves was not my forte.  
"The Lady will see you now, Outsider."

"Mkay thanks" Growly!

I got up and dusted myself up and rubbed the sleep out of my eyes. I was not led back to the hall instead I was escorted to another side chamber only slightly bigger than the last. This one was much cleaner and nicer overall. All the effort for the Lady.  
"Ah there you are child. I hope you rested well. Let me look at you. It seems you got yourself a proper body now."  
"Ah my sleep was fine and thank you for noticing. Your advice helped a lot."  
"And now you came back for your training in magic as I promised."

"Yes I would hope to learn anything you are willing to teach. Also I hope you had a good time in the forest."  
"I did and I brought some things back with me in anticipation of your return."

"My lady?"

She gestured to a few urns and baskets on the side. They were filled with nuts, berries and fruits. "Food." I was so glad to see something edible.

"This is only a temporary solution, but our first lessons should take care of it."

"Thank you soooo much." I dug right in. It wasn't long until I had gorged myself on fruit.

"It is no problem child. You are going to need all the energy for your magic."  
"When are we starting?"

"Right now." I looked up in askance.

She chuckled and I did not know whether that was a good or bad sign, but I had to survive and I had the good fortune to meet the Lady.

"I am not proficient in the magic of men, but I will teach you the lost art of shape-shifting."  
My eyes went wide and I almost swallowed a fruit whole by accident. Shape-shifting! So cool!

"It seems you are excited. Good I hope you can transfer your enthusiasm into your studies."

"Yes teacher!"  
"Your training is going to cover theory and physical training. You need to get your body in good shape to become a more than proficient mage. Every morning you will take runs through the forest until you reach the river and back. You will learn to gather your own breakfast and get some supplies for yourself. In the afternoon I will take time to teach you practical applications of magic until the evening. Also meditate to increase your pool of Mana."

"That is a lot of work." It sounded painful.

"No complains."

"Yes ma'am!"

"Now to start you of. Changing ones form comes natural to those who understand the inconsistency of physical bodies. As a former specter it should not be a problem for you to understand the irrelevance of form. Now all you have to do is develop a will strong enough to change it on this side of the Veil. It helps if you know your chosen form inside and out. Memorize all the details all your senses provide you with.  
We will start with the form I can show you in detail."

"The wolf" Now this is getting more and more exciting.

"Correct. I want you to study my form, all details are important. Look at my eyes, my tail and snout, feel my fur and listen to my sounds. Think of everything you know about wolves." I nodded. "Very well. Let us begin."

Her smile grew feral and her form shook a little. A small flash of green and I was face to snout with "Whitherfang"  
Her hearing picked up on my murmur and she puffed her chest. She came closer and walked a few rounds past me. Her form looked majestic and her gait was elegant and well balanced. I held my hand out and she took my scent in and let me pet her.  
Oooohhh! Her fur was so soft. I let both my hands get lost in the habitual petting motion on her head and behind her ears.

She seemed to like it for a low almost purring noise escaped her.

I became bolder and stuffed my face into her furry shoulder. Man I wish I had a pelt like this. Her smell was almost familiar and expected by now. I could smell the strong scent of pine needles, there was however an additional musky scent. It probably was part of her animalistic form.

"All right let me get a sample of your sound range, please." She started barking, yipping, whining, growling, purring and then took a deeper breath and howled.  
Gods it hurt my ears. What a powerful howl, no wonder she could stun foes with it in the games. The powerful sensation stayed with me for a while and I took a seat on the floor. She sat down too.

I tried to remember all I knew about wolves. I remembered drawing them a lot when I was bored. I liked wolves and foxes.

There were also documentaries I watched on TV about pack behavior and hunting patterns and about people being adopted into packs.

Despite the phrase "lone wolf" wolves were actually very social animals, living in families and playing and learning together. Alpha, beta and omega rankings were very important for their survival. Inevitably my mind also drifted to a certain Dread wolf and his depicted form. My fictional crush would now be a real life elvhen god, maker preserve my fragile heart.

Shaking my head to clear my thoughts I refocused on Whitherfang's form. She was the alpha, no doubt about it. I committed more details to memory. The vivid color of her eyes and the green vines growing up her paws.

When I felt I had finished I gave her a nod and she turned back.

"I admit that was fun. What is the next step my lady?"

"Now you have to picture your transformation. Concentrate on the details you observed and walk through it step by step. Your eyes turn gold. Your pupils become slits, your nails grow long and sharp. Your nose will become more sensitive and pick up all the scents around you. You will grow fur all over your body and your spine elongates into a tail. Then your balance will shift forward. Your face elongates into a snout and your canines grow out.  
Go over this transition in your mind over and over again until you can even do it backwards without forgetting a single step. Visualize it back and forth and then become faster without losing accuracy."

Easier said than done. I sat down more comfortably, closed my eyes and began the exercise.

And so I sat for a few hours. The Lady had left at some point ad came back with some more fruits.

"You can stop now, child. You did well. Eat."

While I was eating she gave me another lecture.  
"Your last lecture for today is how to draw Mana from the Fade. You are now corporal so your connection should be blocked unless you will it open. That way you can access your potential to exert your will and give it form. In other words it is the basis of working magic. You will meditate and feel the boundaries of your mindscape, find your connection and open it. Be gentle. There is no need to force it open and too much too quickly will lead to unwanted attention from the other side."

After my meal I concentrated on my mind.

Usually I could give it all the shapes I wanted. A library, my old house, my high school. This time I went with a nice little Island. White sand, palm trees, colorful exotic birds and a soft breeze.

I started looking for the green thread I had noticed a while ago.

It was the only thing new in my mind so I argued it must be my Fade connection. I found it pretty easy, now how to make it work?

I grasped it with my hands and felt a light tingle, reminiscent of my siphoning of magic.

Would it be as easy as it had been before? I tugged on the string but nothing happened so I followed the thread with a tendril of thought. It was my mindscape after all, stretching out my thoughts and picturing them as tendrils with tiny hands was all just a matter of imagination. The Fade opened to my mind like a hazy storm cloud of vibrant green. It made my head hurt, so I decided to give it a new form. I threw the thread into the ocean surrounding my island and it turned the same sick green the cloud had been before.

As a mental aside 'Oceans should not look as poisonous as this.' The only upside was it was much more accessible. I simply stepped forward until I was ankle deep in the water and I felt it. I was flooded with energy. The more I waded through the water the more used to the feeling I became. The energy was very versatile I could block it out, store it, and absorb it until I felt ready to burst. I felt very powerful. No wonder so many mages in the game became utterly power hungry maniacs and burst into demons.

The Lady's voice pulled me back to awareness.

"Very well done. I would ask that you include these two exercises into your evening routine."

After a while of regaining my orientation I nodded and the energy dispersed.

"Sleep child I will see you tomorrow evening."

I got up slowly and dragged myself back to the fur filled room to catch some shut eye. My last coherent thoughts were of a blob of light I would hopefully meet again.

My dreams featured my meadow again. El was waiting for me in the spot I had left him last time.

"Don't tell me you waited here for me." I got a confirmation. "El I know time is of little import here in the Fade, but still you do not need to do that. Just find me when I fall asleep kay?"

El seemed excited about something.

"So, what shall we do tonight?" My little blue companion moved to the edge of the meadow and stopped there, bobbing up and down. "Want me to follow?" More bobbing.

"Where are we going?" El just kept up his excited whizzing around. "A surprise huh?"

We walked past some of the trees when there was suddenly a path stretching up and out of the forest.

With my focus on the spirit in front of me the change of my surroundings did not even register until I found myself following Elpis through familiar hallways.

"What are we doing back here?" El turned a few times and stopped in front of a room with a stone bed. An elf with long white hair lay sleeping on it.  
Another elf attendant in beautiful patterned robes was using a brush to put a tincture on the lips of the sleeper.

This must have been during the time the dreamers used the temple as a place for uthenera.

Not all dreamers could live of the Fade alone so attendants would have to take care of their physical bodies while their mind was wandering the Beyond.

"Can you show me some more about this time period."

El seemed happy with my interest. He bobbed around and led me to another room.

All night long he showed me new little snippets of ancient elvhen life in this temple.

I chatted on endlessly and El reacted in his own way and made my Fade exploration interesting.


	3. Furry appendages and more

And so my life in the forest ruins began. My mornings were filled with jogging to the river and back. It was followed by stretching.  
I would take the time in the forest to rehearse my knowledge of the plants. I picked some of the healing herbs to experiment with them in my spare time.

During lunch hours I meditated and practiced drawing up Mana and dispersing it again. After munching on some nuts and fruits I went over my transition exercise and started shapeshifting little parts of me. My eye colors first and my hands into claws.

I began experimenting with a wolfs sense of smell (hard thing to get used to)

My training went so far I even became a Wolf girl, tail, ears, claws and canines and golden eyes and all. The transformation took a lot of energy at first, but as weeks passed it all became significantly easier.

While my days were singularly exhausting my nights were extremely fascinating.  
Elpis was always waiting for me every night. He, for somehow he became a male to me, was a wealth of knowledge. He helped me to learn the finer points of Fade manipulation. First he taught me how to shape it in much more detail and how to make pathways.

As a spirit, space within the Fade did not matter. As long as my focus was set and my will strong enough I could bend the space just the same.  
My pathways were still unrefined but with Elpis' help I got better at it.

He also showed me how to block my influence on the Fade. If my own subjective judgement was missing I would end up in the memories of the physical place I slept in.

Technically with this method it would be possible to pull back veil after veil until you touch upon the raw Fade. However in order to do so one would have to achieve true tranquility of mind (not the templar induced kind).

Meditation might work, but it would take me much more time to reach such a proficiency. For now I was happy to learn from the Spirit of Hope that became my best friend.  
He looked after me whenever I fell asleep. As long as he was with me no demons even came close.

It was as though his presence became a protective mantle enveloping me.

Between my Fade adventures and my training time flew by fast. I grew fitter, became faster. My Mana draw became more efficient and precise as did my shifting.  
I thoroughly enjoyed the freedom in the forest.

One day after observing my training routine the Lady said I was ready for my first complete shift. I was so excited and bouncy I had to meditate an extra hour to calm down enough. Once I was settled I followed her outside.

Under her supervision I went through the change process in my mind and then channeled the Mana necessary for the shift.

Falling forward onto 4 paws was as strange as it was exhilarating. In this new form my instincts were much stronger than my logic.

I longed to run through the wilderness and hunt, but something was holding me back. It was the presence of the alpha in front of me. I knew Whitherfang was my superior, although I had started to see her as a mother figure.

I took some time to actually look at my form. My fur was a russet color much like my hair in human form, although it was leaning more toward brown than my original copper red.

"Very well done for your 1st try. This should also solve your food problem. As a wolf it will be natural for you to hunt and eat your own prey. All you have to learn now is how and when to control your instincts. It is time to teach you the way of the wolf."

Gone was the Lady, in her place stood Whitherfang.

It was hard to describe, but instead of communicating with words our body language and small sounds sufficed to convey all we needed.

Despite the flawless shift I was not a wolf yet, not on the inside anyhow. When I took my first uncoordinated steps I managed to look pretty foolish.

It took me a little practice but I got used to walking on 4 legs. I experimented with some jumps over stones and fallen logs.  
It helped me get a measure of my strength. It would take me a long time to gain a modicum of predatory grace, but I would not give up.

My stumbling efforts must be what made Whitherfang treat me like a pup.  
She took me under her wing (or should I say paw) for the following week. She took me running through the forest and when I say running I meant flying on 4 legs.

We explored her hunting grounds together. She taught me how to stalk prey stealthily and how to go through with the kill.  
Whenever I came dangerously close to losing my humanity to my beastly instincts she had me shift back to my human form for a day.

Afterwards she continued to show me paths through the forest and how to differentiate and recognize different scents.  
We found out I could stay in my wolf form for about a week without having to turn back.

After 2 months of training the Lady stopped our exploration as wolves and gave me free reign. She also encouraged me to seek out new forms in the forest.

All this time I had grown used to life here in the forest. Now that I knew how to survive on my own I began to wish to see the outside world.  
I wished to explore the rest of Thedas.  
I wanted to explore Ferelden cities and the Frostbacks. I wanted to visit all the city states of the Free Marches.  
I wanted to go as far east as Rivain and west to the Anderfells.

It seems this new kind of wanderlust was here to stay, but I wanted to make a plan before I went alone into the world. So my departure was put on hold.

It was shaping up to be a day like any other. This day I chose to spend my afternoon in wolf form. As I sped through the forest I came upon a scent, which was wholly unfamiliar to me.

Naturally my curiosity got the better of me and I followed the trail west and south through the thick underbrush.

The scent mingled with that of the Halla of the forest. Even from a distance I could hear their bleating and the sounds of wooden wheels dragging through the dirt and fallen leaves.  
All these details formed one unmistakable picture in my mind. The Dalish had arrived in the Brecilian outskirts.

That meant three things:  
I would have to be careful hunting in this region, lest I become the hunted.  
The Werewolves are going to go to war to break their curse and finally the Wardens would arrive soon.  
The story of this country would finally progress and I would get the chance to become part of it.

As I was sort of part of the Lady's court I took this chance to scout out the Dalish numbers and camp position. Using my stealth and reflexes I followed their Aravel caravan all the way to a place where the trees grew further apart.  
It was a perfect spot for them to set camp. I made sure to walk slowly and with care. It would not do to underestimate the elven hunters and become a pincushion.

They were certainly organized.

The hunters took positions as look outs in a circle around the camp. Some elves were putting up tents and folded the Aravel's sails, others separated the Halla herd from the elves and guided them into a makeshift pen.

Two elves with staves kept putting up statues and idols. If I remember correctly these two would be Keeper and First of the clan.  
The idols must be dedications to the old elven gods. If there are idols of all the supposed 'creators' there must also be…

Aha! There it was.

I crept forward to a statue at the very outskirts of their camp.  
I mirrored its posture and stared at the imagery of the immobile wolf in front of me.

I could not fathom why and how the Dalish could be so blind. Every depiction of the wolf that symbolized Fen'Harel looked like a watchful guardian.

The trickster of the Dalish tales was actually a guardian of the people. It would take a while, but if I was careful and patient I would get to meet the Rebel Wolf in the future. I wondered where he was sleeping at the moment and if I could meet him in the Fade.

There always had been some things that had bothered me about his attitude. I really wish I could ask him about his plans for the Fade and the Veil. If only…  
Oh well, I am sure I will get the chance eventually.

I continued to watch the busy elves for a while and left to report some of my findings once I grew bored of the repetition. When I arrived to deliver my report, the Lady already knew of their arrival. She was however grateful for their exact number and position.

She smiled at me when I confirmed Zathrian's presence. I did not regret it a bit.  
The coward had it coming. I only hoped the Wardens chose the path that lifted the curse.  
That Keeper was a nasty piece of work. I know what happened to his family was horrible, but that did not give him the right to hold a grudge for over 3 generations.

I went to sleep that evening and told Elpis all about it. As much as he taught me I had started to teach him things as well.  
I had told him all that happened to me during the days.

At some point I had been hit with intense longing for my home and experienced a much overdue culture shock. El helped me weather through it all.  
After that incident I began to trust him with my foreknowledge which I had gained in my world.

He listened to me without judgement and stuck around. Our constant exchange changed him. He became more expressive and took an almost fairy like shape instead of remaining a simple wisp.

In response to the story of Zathrian and Whitherfang, El became morosely sad for the both of them. He seemed to realize that I carried my own sorrows. Whether the wardens lifted the curse with violence or without the Lady would be released from her mortal body. I had come to see her as a surrogate mother and pack leader and I would lose her.

El filled me with hope and reminded me of the fact that this was indeed what she wished for most.

Lost in my own contemplations it took me a while to notice that El was trying to tell me something.

The way he was switching emotions and danced through the air he must be especially excited.  
"Change is coming, is that what has you so excited?" He did several somersaults.  
That was new, but I agreed with him. It was nice to see some change to the monotone routine.  
If this change was going to be good or bad for me is still out in the open.

"This forest is never boring it seems." El agreed.

"Even if the Lady returns to her purpose as the spirit of the forest, at least I will have you."

Happiness engulfed me.

"I am very fortunate to have you as a friend." If a spirit could cry, I am pretty sure Elpis would.

"The Grey wardens will be here soon." El shivered in anticipation.

"Yeah I promise I'll tell you all about it when I meet them." To my surprise El conveyed a lot of worry for me.

"Oh do not worry for me. I do not plan on fighting. I will simply be a bystander and observe." He was happy with my concession and gave me a feeling I liked to call his version of a hug.

"Thanks for tonight's company. Bye-bye El." I closed my eyes in the Fade only to open them to the familiar ceiling.

I stretched as I swung myself out of my cot. With as long as I had been living with them the Werewolves were completely used to me by now. In other words they simply ignored me. Live and let live and all that.  
News of the Dalish must have spread. The entirety of the Wolves behaved like an overturned beehive. I did not want to get involved in this.

After popping a few bones back into place in my shoulder I made my way outside. With a little sprint and jump I performed a shift into wolf form.

My world immediately became less saturated and yet my spatial awareness jumped to new heights and my surroundings became a picture of scents.  
The magical presence of Whitherfang was palpable in the air. The Lady was out and about. I appeared to have some time until the Warden's arrival.

I decided to do what I liked doing best. I ran. As a wolf running was fun. I was fast and agile, the landscape just flew by me. Most animals gave me a wide berth unless it was something as big as I, in which case it was also slower than I and nothing to worry about.

Even the giant bears respected wolves if they were the same size as them. My powerful strides carried me far and fast. On my journey I chewed berries from bushes and fed myself with hares, badgers and occasional deer.

My instincts just took over when I allowed them to. Stalk carefully close to the ground, stay upwind so they don't smell you coming.  
Then when they are in range, leap for their throat, end it quickly and painlessly.

Their neck cracks under the pressure and blood comes spilling into my snout, it was so satisfying, if a bit gross in retrospect.

I learned to love the thrill of the hunt, especially at night. From time to time I heard the howling of ordinary wolf packs. I tried not to interfere with their affairs.

From across the distance I could hear the howls of the werewolves. Their voices carried uncontrolled range and pain.  
I ignored them and concentrated on enjoying the wildlife around me.

A stony outcropping became my temporary lair. I enjoyed lazily napping on top of it in the sunlight. One day it rained and I took shelter underneath it instead.

5 days were spent in the area around my makeshift lair until I decided to return to the ruins.  
7 days were after all still my maximum time in wolf form. There was no need to take any risks.

I came back into familiar territory only to find utter chaos reigning.  
Werewolves were bleeding out on the forest floor. Some had been turned into pincushions, others had slash wounds all over their pelts.

I did not share much kinship with the werewolves aside from my relationship with the Lady. Still it hurt a little to see so many of them dead. Of course I remembered the Wardens left a bloody trail of corpses behind them. Being their enemy did not pay at all.

It made me wonder who the Warden was. A warrior, a rogue or a mage was possible. Any origin was possible too. Come to think of it there might even be more than one Warden.

Who said reality would be video game canon conform.

There was no need to put myself in danger. I circumvented the rest of the trail and made my way to the back entrance of the ruins. Turning back into a human I made my way to the front hall. I locked several doors behind me as I made my way to the main entrance of the ruins. Anyone wishing to find the Lady's court or the lower ruins would have to pass through here.

It took no time at all until I heard many footsteps approaching. In the game the team always only traveled in groups of 4 no matter how many companions were available.

The only sensible thing to do in reality would be to show up with as many helpers as possible.  
Slowly their silhouettes became distinct enough to make them out.

There was Leliana with her bright red hair, Morrigan with her distinct raven spiky up do, next to her, the blonde with disheveled hair and shiny armor, must be Alistair.

The giant on the right side was Sten of the Beresaad. There was no Wynne in sight so they probably had not been to the Circle yet. Aside from those companions that I recognized there were 3 more people and a dog.

Barkspawn was the first to notice me, his superior sense of smell warning him of my presence.

The young blond lady in armor must be the Cousland Warden, judging from the heraldry on her shield.

Next to her stood a short figure with face tattoos, meaning he was a Carta dwarf warden. And to top it all off, the lean elf with Vallaslin on his face and looking like he swallowed a grapefruit whole, must be Mahariel.

Oh goodie, a whole squad of Wardens!

Must be an interesting team dynamic. Cousland is probably leading the whole troupe. Morrigan and Mahariel are probably the stand-offish minority.

Not sure about the Dwarf yet. Sten has always been following duty over anything else, he was Qunari after all. Leliana and Alistair are the do-gooders of the group always helping anyone.

Analysis was complete.

They were close enough to see me by now and still kept walking. They must feel safe due to their numbers.

The first one to react was Mahariel, who immediately went for his bow and notched an arrow. I held up my hands in the universal sign of peaceful cooperation. They remained weary but the do-gooders Leliana and Alistair came forward, seemingly concerned about my well-being.

"Why hello there, did you perhaps seek shelter here from the beasts?" Leliana asked in her sweet lilting Orlesian accent.

"Are you in need of assistance?" Alistair continued.

"Careful you two, this could be a trap!" Mahariel tried to warn them away.

"I agree. She has a strangely wild magical aura. Perhaps tis another forest spirit akin to that twittering fool of a hermit." Came the judgement for the Witch.

Let's help them out shall we.

"I am not a Spirit. I am simply a mage enjoying wild magic. I am not here for shelter and thank you for asking, but I do not need of assistance. In fact I was actually hoping to be of assistance to you."

"A most curious offer. However we already have enough useless riffraff slowing us down if you ask me." Ouch way to show the love Morrigan.

"Hold a moment we can use some advice on these ruins and she seems to know her way around." Ah the first comment of the fearless leader. Cousland sure had a nice voice and a decent head on her shoulders.

"Do not misinterpret. I do not wish to join your group. My only desire is to avoid further bloodshed." I was absolutely serious about this and it must have shown on my face.

"Very well, we will hear you out."

"Before you are two paths." I began, "One leads through a ruin full of undead, walking skeletons, giant spiders and a drake. The other path leads you to the court in which the Lady of the Forest gives audiences. If you agree to a parley, I will lead you directly to her. That means no one draws a weapon or draws on Mana."

Cousland was contemplating.

"This could be a trap you know!" That was the first I heard of the dwarves. He spoke with a brogue voice.

"It could also be an earnest proposal!" Leliana joined in.

"As much as I would like to believe you, we cannot take that chance." Cousland decided.

I shook my head.

"I can understand your decision even if I lament it. Very well. Good luck in the lower ruins. I will be waiting for you at court."

"Wait! Are you working with those monstrosities?!" Mahariel had the arrow from before pointed straight at me.

"I cannot say I am working for or with them. I am merely here as a guest of the Lady."

"What Lady!? Do you work with the creature Whitherfang?! Tell me why I should not kill you right here and now. Your friends are responsible for the slaughter of my people!" Mahariel's face twisted in rage, made more prominent by the deep purple Vallaslin of Elgar'nan on his face.

"Peace Hunter! Do not be so quick to judge. Milady would never start a massacre like this. The Werewolves are simply too filled with rage to see reason. But their rage is centered on your Keeper Zathrian. He is the originator of this curse, if you have to point fingers, try your own people for a change."

With that I ignored him and his arrow and walked off. In the background I could hear the dwarf say "Well he did act suspiciously, yeah?"

"We will find out one way or another. Let's go." The troupe followed her down the ruined hallways.

I left them to their adventuring and made my way down to the main meeting hall. So far it seemed devoid of any werewolf forces. Only the Lady was waiting in her spot with her guard.

"They are coming."

She nodded. "I know childe. For good or ill, the end is coming."

Something in my body language must have given me away. She spread her arms and I did not hesitate to fall into them.

"Milady I am going to miss you." I would not deny I was close to tears.

"What will be, will be my child. My end is much overdue, do not weep for me. You have an interesting future ahead of you and I will be protecting every living creature in this forest once more."

"I will miss you regardless."

"I have something for you. My parting gift, if you will. Unwrap it when you feel alone and be careful with how you use it. I am sure you will do fine." She gave me a warm smile and petted my head.  
I put the little package in my pockets carefully. A few tears escaped me.

I dragged myself into a shaded corner of the hall and waited there.

While I wanted nothing more than to stand by my lady's side, I could not forget my promise to El.  
Next to Whitherfang I would undoubtedly get dragged into combat. Here in my corner I sat cross-legged and waited for the confrontation.

The gift of the lady felt heavy in my pocket. I could tell even with all the layers of cloth, that the object within was carrying some of the lady's magic. At least it was connected to her signature. It felt wild and feral like her. She gave me a piece of her.

Sadly my contemplations had to be put on hold as the wardens stepped into the Hall with several Werewolves joining the fray.

All of them looked worse of wear. Alistair and Cousland in particular seemed to be sporting singed armor. Must've run into the drake.  
The game also had not been kidding about the amount of blood involved in this world.

Swiftrunner was heatedly arguing with the lady against the warden presence. The wardens argue back, but the Lady diffuses the situation expertly.  
I really had no motivation to get involved. My mood took a turn for the worse when the wardens left through the main exit.

Just a few moments later they returned with Zathrian in turn. I did not want to listen to his excuses any more than I wanted to watch the fight about to happen. However I would not leave the lady in her final moments.

Belated I realized that Zathrian animated the sylvan trees to fight for him. And so I was forced to join in after all. My combat experience was non-existence so I just ran around, dodge rolling all over the place. I did not get hit!

Then Whitherfang howled and stunned everyone around.

Maybe it was just me but she seemed a little smaller than usual.

It was all I could do not to be trampled or caught in AOE spells. Then the fight was over as sudden as it had begun.

Zathrian was beaten and finally agreed to lift the curse. With all the drama unraveling in front of me I almost missed the part of my lady fading.  
She gave one last look in my direction and smiled before finally leaving this place.  
The wardens seemed happy with the outcome but I just felt like someone sapped my strength.

"I hope you are happy with this outcome. I admit it was the best for everyone." I stepped out of the shadows.

The group reacted in surprise to my presence. Most of them looked notably upset about my sudden appearance.

Mahariel stepped forward and looked straight at me.

"I owe you an apology. My behavior when we first met was driven by grief and anger. I behaved no better than the beasts I condemned. You tried to warn us about Zathrian and even then I almost did not want to believe it. No one is above fault."

"It is no shame to want to believe the best of your people. I do not blame you for your earnest belief in the Dalish." Mahariel gave me a respectful nod in return. He was not such a big prat after all.

"You do not look so good." Leliana seemed to still be concerned for everyone.

"I will be fine with time. This was the best outcome for both the Dalish and the Werewolves. However do not ask me to thank you. The Lady was the closest to a mother I had."

"Oh no. I am so sorry. I hope you find the time to grief properly." I nodded at Leliana in gratitude.

"What will you do now?" Cousland asked me.

"I will stay and see the former Were's off. And then I will protect the forest from the dark influences of the south. I wish you all the best in your quest to stop the 5th blight."

After more murmurs of sad banter I escorted them back to the exit.

"Before you leave a bit of advice: Trust the crow, it is loyal to the end. Find the hidden secret of Soldiers peak. Look for most holy remains in a safe Haven. That will be all."

"Thanks, uh I guess."

"Dareth Shiral, Hunter." Mahariel was surprised to hear the elvish farewell.

"Too you as well."

And with a last wave from Cousland, they departed.

The time that followed the departure of the wardens could be summarized by one word: silence.

I was painfully reminded of my first few days in this world. Again I was all alone with no one to talk to and haunting the empty ruins like a ghostly apparition. The only one who kept me anchored to reality was Elpis.

My friend made the loneliness bearable. My problem was that I could only sleep so much, before I needed to return to the waking world.

What does it say about a person when they feel more alive in their dreams rather than their normal day to day life?  
I was now faster, stronger and equipped with magic and yet I felt more vulnerable than ever. A wolf needs a pack and I lost mine.

The serene, calming aura of my lady was sorely missing from the ruins. If I concentrated hard enough I could feel it in the forest around me, but it was a poor replacement for her physical presence.

When my missing her became too much I pulled out her parting gift. After unwrapping the layer of cloth, I held a tooth in my hand. Not just any tooth either. It was Whitherfang's, it must be.

The charm was as big as my thumb and had fine green vines etched into the root of it. The lines were too fine to be made by hand, so it must have been made by magic.  
It exuded the lady's magic, cool and clean like wind through leaves, leaving the scent of dry pine needles behind. Clutching the charm in my hands I almost cried again, it felt so painfully familiar.

I decided to wear it on a leather string around my neck for now. Maybe I will come up with a better way later.  
The charm had no obvious use to me until I noticed a change in my shifting.

It came as a surprise when I finally noticed a small amount of foreign magic activating whenever I started my shape shifting.

Fine tendrils of mana were merging with my own. After some experimentation I found the effect was stronger when the tooth had direct contact with my skin. Overall the influence was subtle and yet the results were more than notable.

During my times as wolf I noticed an odd transition of my fur color. Every day it got lighter and lighter. My dark russet color turned honey, then blond and finally white. Over the last 2 weeks my size had doubled and then stabilized.  
When the transformation of my wolf form was complete, the mana threshold for my shift was noticeably higher than before. As I observed my new looks I was pleasantly surprised at the thoughtfulness of my Lady's gift.

I now took the form of a gigantic white wolf. No doubt I would tower even over the biggest horses in this world. My paws showed vine like patterns in an inky black color and my golden eyes now had traces of green in them. All in all I looked like Whitherfang Jr.

It had not been a simple parting gift.

She had made me her heiress. I was now her legacy.

In my new form my magic was not suppressed anymore. I could use my magic like a pulse of energy to scan my surroundings for me. I'd wager I could even give Whitherfang's stunning howls a try. In fact I did. What was life without a little fun?

I put my head into my neck and howled. Magic wove into the sound and carried it far and wide through the forest. Hopefully I did not give any Dalish hearing me a heart attack. With how frightened some seemed of the legends of Fen'Harel, my new image and sound range is sure to put the horror into them.

Aside from me gaining a new form everything stayed quiet in the forest. In fact it was far too quiet. I spend my spare time running through the forest in my new wolf form to relearn hunting and stalking.  
The new size gave me some troubles at first and white fur was harder to hide in the dark, but I managed. There was after all new prey in the Brecilian forest,

Darkspawn.

Hunting them kept my mind occupied and thus helped me cope with my grief.

As far as I was concerned they were my new neighbors and I did not appreciate them one bit. The blight was contagious, so of course I was careful not to ingest any blood and instead focused on eviscerating them with my claws.

The increase in darkspawn also meant the increase in blighted creatures. I had to fight blight wolves and bearnsken every other day. Most other wildlife was killed rather than transformed. Maybe the blight specifically only transformed things that could kill other things, a blight rabbit seemed pretty useless after all.

The Dalish helped to keep the woods clean of blighted ilk, until one day they packed up and left. Most of the Aravels went further south towards the Kocari wilds.

The hunters went North West, most likely gathering in Redcliff with the rest of the warden forces, which meant the final battle at Denerim was happening soon.

Had it really been more than a year already since I came to Thedas? Time sure flies.

My wanderlust gripped me again. It was stronger this time for there was nothing keeping me here anymore. My only friend was Elpis and he was a spirit of the Fade.  
They were not usually bound to any one place, so he could follow me around if he wished. I hoped he would accompany me. In fact I would ask him to do so next time I met him.

In order to get around in Thedas I would need to do a little planning.

I would need a back story for when people asked me of my origins, also I would need money to start me off.

Traveling could easily be done in my wolf form but I would want to eat and sleep in an inn from time to time to talk to people. Outfitting myself with new clothes and weapons might not be a bad idea either.

The back story I was not sure of yet, but my money problem was a simple fix. Without further ado I started pilfering the lower ruins. The dragon horde was emptied courtesy of the wardens, but they could not have taken everything.

I found some pretty baubles and some shiny trinkets in good enough shape to be sold or traded later. I had no backpack available yet, so I fashioned myself a bag from some left over furs and leather cords.

As I walked through the ruined temple I stuck as close as possible to the route the wardens had taken. Most foes had been eliminated by them, so I did not have to worry overmuch.

One thing I was insanely curious about was a memory from my gaming experience.  
Walking down a certain set of stairs had reminded me of a time I had led my character on a wild goose chase for certain black vials containing revenants.

In game I had picked up an ancient phylactery by happy accident.

Said phylactery could gain you the mage specialization called Arcane Warrior, if you released the trapped spirit inside. Since I was pretty good friends with a spirit of hope, I thought I could help this one as well. Who knows if it was actually still here or how long it had been trapped?

I had to shift through some broken crates and rubble to find the item I was looking for.

The phylactery did not in fact look like a vial. Rather it looked like a smooth, thin crystal.  
There was no liquid kept in it, but something almost like blue fog swirled inside it. My magic reached out to scan the curiosity in my hands. I could feel the aura of the spirit within.

El once explained to me I would always be more sensitive to spirits presence and would find it easy to connect with them on a deeper level than most other people.

My soul once took the shape of the spirits of this world and so I was kin to them and forever will be.

Subsequently it came of little surprise that I could immediately connect to the prisoner of the phylactery. What happened next however was altogether new and would have far reaching consequences.

The moment my finger touched the crystal my hypersensitivity made me black out.  
The sheer intensity of my connection with her was overwhelming.  
As fate seemed to work in mysterious ways, it was the image of a blurry yet familiar she-elf that greeted me in my mindscape.

There she stood in full armor and with two swords strapped to her hips. Confused she took a look around. She herself looked very out of place in my peaceful meadow. I was shocked to find that I recognized her.

It had been almost a year, but one rarely forgets the first impression of anything. And my first impression of the Fade had certainly been memorable. I had seen this warrior in my first dream, in fact it had been the moment she was trapped in this crystal in the first place.

She looked in wonder at my meadow and marveled at her own presence. After she was satisfied staring at her surroundings she became aware of me. Her haunted eyes gave me the impression she had not seen or done anything pleasant for a long while.

"What a marvel." Her voice was soft and broken from the lack of use. It still carried a faint lilting note, reminiscent of what it once was.

"Welcome to my mind. I imagine you have not foreseen anyone's sudden appearance."

"No." She looked at me in wonder and then began scrutinizing herself.

"Indeed I had almost forgotten my own appearance." Much pain and confusion shimmered in her violet eyes.

Her gaze snapped back to me after a moment.

"Thank you for the opportunity to remember." The more she spoke the more her voice recovered.

"Not a problem. My curiosity got the better of me when I found your prison and felt your presence inside."

"Ah my prison… If you are amendable I have a favor to ask of you. I realize we are strangers, however I would be immensely grateful if you could help me find release from this crystalline prison."

"I will help in any way I can. How will I destroy the phylactery? I do not know much of these types of magic. Do I just put it on one of the altars?"  
"You will need to utter the release phrase. An altar might help amplify the magic."

"Alright, it will be done." Her shoulders sacked in relief and she looked close to tears.

"Thank you. Please allow me to reward you for your assistance. I do not remember much of my life, but what little knowledge I can offer is yours. I was once a champion of my people, asked to guard the dreamers who entered the long sleep. Yours will be the knowledge that leads to victory."

Something about her last phrase caught my attention.  
I was reasonably sure that I was speaking in English, but I was not sure about her. Something about communicating in mindscapes must make language irrelevant.

"That is a generous offer. I accept and hope you will find rest in the beyond."

"May you be blessed. Walk in peace stranger." She put her hand in front of her chest and bowed her head in gratitude and farewell.

"Pleased to be of help." I copied her gesture and concentrated on waking.

With a little delay I came back to awareness. A few steps to my right was a small altar I could use to boost my magic.

The crystal was placed in the middle of the stone surface and I kept it in place with my index finger. I reestablished my connection to the spirit and let her speak the 5 words of release through me.  
As I had already guessed she had not been speaking common. The phrase sounded elvhen, which made sense considering the form she had taken.  
The crystal gave a shudder and broke. Blue mist oozed out of the cracks and dissipated in the air.

The moment the crystal gave in to the magical pressure, there was a flash of white before my eyes. Suddenly I was overwhelmed with images and voices and sounds.

I barely registered the shattering of the prism in my hand.

Pain was all I felt.  
My head was being split open.

My body felt both entirely too hot and freezing cold.  
At some point I heard screaming, too engrossed in what happened inside of me to recognize my own voice.

It was too much, too intense, too everything. Eventually my body just shut down.

Normally the oblivion of unconsciousness gave sweet relief of pain. I had no such luck. Whatever had happened during the knowledge transfer must have gone wrong.

My head had downloaded not only her combat knowledge, but everything that was left of her memory.

I caught some glimpses of childhood memories and family moments and images of enormous, beautiful structures floating above lush green forests. I could also see many bloody battles, some duels, some fights against beasts.

The scenes played out as though I was in the Fade. Perhaps I was?  
Slowly my perspective changed. I stopped observing and began experiencing instead. They must be her memories.

Or my memories? Was there a difference?

What did I remember?

 _My parents arranging a coming of age ceremony. I remembered both my brothers' inaugurations into priesthood._ Wait! I did not have any brothers. I was the only child of my parents.

 _My parents wanted me to become a cleric or at least marry another noble._ No wait, wait!  
They were happy when I studied psychology and we were certainly not nobles.

I certainly was not. I lived on my own in a tiny flat and then died. Had I died? Was I dead?

 _No, my brother had trapped me. The feeling of betrayal still hurt like a knife through the chest._ I did not have a brother!  
 _But I fought them a lot, verbally. I also fought with weapons_. I had never held weapons before in my life.

In the chaotic maelstrom of two individual lifetimes worth of memories, it was clear the longer lifetime won out.  
Two decades worth of mortal lifetime could not hold a candle against two millennia of elvhen memories. And yet the core of my soul could not accept all of it…

Both sets shaped different personalities. The stronger set clashed horribly with mine and was incompatible with my soul. This tore me apart from the inside out, fractured me, and bruised my being.

My pain echoed in the Fade. I despaired and was about to cave under the pressure of my own emotions and the foreign memories.

And then a sense of ease overcame me. It was so sudden and so complete.  
It shocked me into a semi coherent state of mind.

Help had arrived and hit the pause button of my brain.

Elpis had come to my rescue, albeit his solution was only temporary. That was the general impression he gave me anyhow.

He himself was frantic. His movement was so fast I could barely follow it.

"I am in trouble I know. I released an ancient spirit. She gave me knowledge as reward, but it was more than we had previously agreed on."

El tried to hold himself still in order to listen attentively. It made his form shake in place.

"I have downloaded her whole life. I am losing myself. El I am scared." My voice broke and I began shaking as badly as my friend.

He contemplated, then spread a wave of reassurance.

Elpis came so close he made physical contact with her brow.

'Cannot undo. Cannot separate. Could seal but only for a little while.'

"Is there no solution you can think of?"

'Compromise possible. Absorb memories. Fuse beings?'

"So I would essentially be me and her."

'Yes. No. Not sure. You are you. But you will live as her. More experience yet old personality. You change gradually. In deep sleep.'

"But won't I be asleep for 2000 years then? I cannot survive that, El."

'Will help, body in magical stasis, mind in Fade. Time irrelevant.'

"So you will put me in a variation of Uthenera? I will process foreign memories and you keep my body alive?"

'Essentially.'

"That sound exhausting, for both you and me."

'You will change. I will diminish. Only chance. Alternative, you, soul splinters. Small specks shining in the dark.'

"You will diminish?! Absolutely not! No! I won't allow it. You will not kill yourself to save me. I will deal with the memories somehow."

'Disagree. First insanity. Then death. Learned from you and taught you. Fulfilled my purpose, gave you hope and comfort. Save your life by giving pieces of me. Will stay with you forever.'

"I just lost one friend. I cannot lose you too. I will be utterly alone."

'Never alone. Walk the fade. Walk the land. Find new friends.'

"El…" I had started crying, which of course did nothing to improve the situation, but grief just poured out of me.

First my brain decided to overload and now my heart follows.

"Is it… Is it really the only option?"

'Yes'

I nodded morosely. Elpis gave me a feeling of comfort and contentment. It was as if he had hugged me good bye. I understood.

"Love you too El."

The spirit of Hope shivered one last time and then burst into a shower of sparks. Like fairy glitter it attached itself to any available surface of my body.

We awoke on the cool ground, lightheaded and still in pain. Everything was muted and every movement seemed almost automated.

In a trance we walked the empty hallways deeper into the temple. Finally we ended up in a chamber with a bed made of stone in its center.

The room was cold and empty and fit the general mood. It felt like a funeral march. These places were designed for Uthenera, so they would definitely suit our purpose.

With a few hand gestures and a chant of ancient words, we set up wards around the place and turned to lie on the bed. Silent tears fell to the ground. When next these eyes would open the world would have lost a spirit of hope and gained an ancient soul.

In my mind I was scared of being overwhelmed again. From all around echoed a final message.

'Have Hope'

I have.

…

.


	4. Glimpses of another life

A/N Another small chapter added. I shall update the story every week on my days off. I have several notebooks filled with the complete part 1. So it really is only a matter of me finding time to type it all up.

Enjoy Elvhenan free-form! And Christmas!

Chapter 4

What happened next could be best described as an interactive 3D film festival, with a bad glitch in the movie data.

I was privy to the highlights of Sylvanavir's life, almost like a biography. To be honest it almost felt like her memories became mine, it simply felt so real. The only problem was the constant 'on' and 'off' of video and audio.

Some memories were skipped and black outs occurred frequently. It made for an entirely dissociative experience.

Mostly I woke to fundamentally different environments.

Once, soft light fell through wispy curtains. The sky outside seemed closer and iridescent. No longer was it blue but many colors shimmered above like the patterns of an oil film.  
Before I could take in more of the details my body decided to get up from the bed and land barefoot on a cold stone floor.

I was tiny. Lying in bed it was not as noticeable but while standing upright, all the proportions seemed off. The chairs and tables were taller than me.

This was wrong. Again my body moved independent of my wishes.  
With my short little legs I made my way across the room to a giant wardrobe and picked a few clothes.

Smooth leggings and a frilly dress with multiple layers. My adult mind made a face at the indignity of wearing something so diabetes inducing.

Properly dressed I made my way out the door and through a hallway. The walls and floors were covered in stone inlays, mosaics and expensive looking tapestries.  
My family was apparently loaded. The journey was interrupted by a young male elf in a dark blue robe with silver threading.

"There you are Sylva. Father and Mother are already away. Your tutors are waiting for you in the Emerald study. Do not be tardy now or mother shall be cross with you."  
I was surprised by the feelings of affection I held for this stranger.  
We shared a father and mother, which would make this person my brother.

One of my 3 brothers was intuitively added in thought.

"Days blessings brother, I was just on my way there. Thank you for your thoughtful reminder. I will hurry." My mouth replied without my permission and in a voice that was young and trilling like a song bird.

In auto pilot my body bounded up to my brother gave him a quick hug.  
A benevolent smile and a pat on my head was all the reaction he would give me before I continued down the hall, a spring in my step.

By now I understood what was going on. I was living through her, Sylva's, memories.

I would not be able to do anything or say anything. My mind was simply going for a very long ride.

The idea of being imprisoned without control over myself or my actions for the next several hundred years was absolutely terrifying. Only the opportunity to obtain a treasure trove of knowledge pacified me slightly.  
I could develop an understanding for both her and her society.

During my musings the body (I suppose now _my_ body) walked into a study and talked to several elves in fancy robes.

For the next hours I sat through lectures on politics and proper comportment. I was so focused on my own thoughts, I barely registered my immediate surroundings.

Just as I was about to get super bored I noticed was my surroundings blurring as if someone had submerged a fresh painting in water.  
Everything just dissolved.  
For a moment I was reminded of the pensive memories in Harry Potter.

Suddenly the entire setting changed.  
I was standing in a wide outdoors area doing stretches as per instructions. Somewhere off to my left a stern looking elf in armor scowled at me and barked orders from time to time.  
My body switched into a different position after every shout.

The blank spots and time skips happened in unpredictable intervals. Sometimes I would miss a night's sleep, other times I would skip several years.  
Many of my early memories included lessons.

Indoors I would learn how to control and use my magic, how to dress properly, how to manage people, finances, politics and so forth.  
My personal favorites however would be the lessons outdoors. Gardening and riding lessons and stretches and acrobatics. Later in Sylva's life she and I would receive combat training for swords, glaives and bows. Occasionally father would even allow us to go hunting with some of Andruil's retainers.

My step mother was appalled at my desire for physical exercise and fighting. A lady should be well spoken and invisible and be very well versed in indirect and discrete magic. In her mind I was walking the path that led astray.

Father was strict but fair. As long as I sat through all my theoretical and magic lessons and excelled, he allowed me to indulge in my own interests. He would never admit it but he had a soft spot for me. I was his only daughter after all.

My older brother (whom I adored) was his heir. He was intelligent, well-spoken and possessed a gentle strength that made him very popular with almost anyone he spoke to.

Whenever I had a problem I could go to him.

Father was rarely present and I cultivated a mutual hateful relationship with my stepmother so he was my only constant. I loved him and he loved me. Whenever I had time I would visit him and he would teach me new magic spells or tell me funny stories from his time among the noble court.

I was second eldest and the second child of father's first wife. He named me Sylvanavir. It translated to 'the last breath to take' in a very poetic way. Only later did I find out that I was named Sylvanavir because my mother died of childbirth.

It was extremely rare this happened at all and so it was taken as an ill omen by most of my family. The only exceptions were my father and brother. Father once told me he saw in me all the good and wonderful aspects of my mother. Brother said I was his little baby sister and he would protect me no matter what.

My two younger brothers were twins, another rare occurrence.

They were the sons of my step mother, who instantly gained prestige for birthing twins. And she basked in the attention, always going on about how her sons were destined for greatness. She promised to dedicate them to Dirthamen and Falon'Din respectively, out of deepest respect to them and their twin-bond. It was nauseating.

Father allowed her to manage most of their son's upbringing and in return she would not interfere in my life. A fair deal overall.  
However this cease-fire agreement did not apply to my twin menaces. They took every chance they got to belittle or bully me when my father or brother were not around. Once I became a proficient fighter they stopped out of fear of retribution, my childhood looking after them was hellish still.

Living a puppet life felt odd, but soon enough I started to enjoy this world. It was vibrant and full of magic. My new senses were easy to get used to. I could see better, hear more, smell more. As I adapted to my new existence, Sylvanavir became me.

It was simply impossible to live through 700+ years of life and not accept it as your own.

I retained a large portion of my personality. I was simply not as haughty or as bitter as the original Sylva had become over time.

She had a difficult childhood and started to distance herself from courtly life by dedicating herself to the path of the arcane warriors. All her personal frustration was channeled into excelling in her training. Many frowned upon this physical pursuit.

Channeling ones magic inwards to augment your body was simply a sign of incompetence at normal magic to most. Equally as many people had no choice but to respect her position. The honor and integrity of champions and guardians such as Sylva was unquestionable, much like the magical equivalent of a Knight.

Despite her step mothers disdain for her she still used Sylva's station to impress her fellow nobles. For such a purpose she had been invited again and again to participate in all manners of celebrations and evening affairs.

Usually she was too focused on her mind and meditation and the training of her body. The turbulent life within the political game was not to her liking at all. She was too young, too inexperienced and too honest to compete with the elite of Arlathan.

Mostly she danced with her father and brother and the rest of the event she smiled politely and observed and listened. It was her gift to elegantly blend into the background.  
Being considered part of the décor allowed her to overhear gossip and rumors, which was otherwise restricted to insiders and servants.

On one of the numerous occasions she caught glimpses of all of the Evanuris. And so I got to see them first hand as well. They left quite the impression.  
Mythal and Sylaise had invited the upper class to celebrate the completion of a new temple in the central district of Arlathan's main island. Both insisted that the entire council made an appearance, so they did. (Emotional blackmail at its finest)

We caught a glimpse of Sylaise with her coper red hair woven with stands of spun gold, a trail of bronze fabric trailed behind her. She stood next to her mother, Mythal, wearing a dress of flowing silver. It was hard to make out where her own silver blond hair ended and her shimmering gown started. On her head rested a crown reminiscent of dragon horns. Both ladies stood like queens, noble, beautiful and proud.

Next to them stood an odd pair. No less proud but more primal, Andruil stood in a dress made from leather and furs. Her eyes gleamed and her grin was feral. No one would want to approach her in a mood like this. One exception was the young lady in white sitting next to her.  
Ghilanain was not one of the Evanuris, but she had been allowed into the council after Andruil uplifted her.  
The mother of Halla was dressed in all white. Her hair was held up in a headdress mimicking the horns of her favored creations. Despite the formality one would expect from these events her dress was translucent and showed a lot of her porcelain skin.

Elgar'nan stood close to his wife Mythal. He was an imposing figure, as dark as Mythal was light. His garments were a balance of black robes and golden armor. With an impressive frown on his face, he watched the people around the hall.  
June had always been more interested in his own works than social interaction. He sat off to the side, tanned skin, red garments and his shiny brown hair held back by metallic beads with intricate designs.

While most of the pantheon mingled with each other and some of their most favored, two figures would always stood apart from the crowd. Though they did gravitate towards each other.

Dirthamen and Falon'Din stood together like a negative mirror image. Both were fair skinned and tall, almost as tall as Elgar'nan.  
Falon'Din looked around with an absentminded expression. Clothed in pale, multilayered robes, adorned with white raven feathers, he looked like he could dissolve into mist at any given moment like a mirage. Dirthamen had a heavier presence. His coat was dark purple and anthracite in color. It pooled and dragged on the floor around him and the hood obscured the upper part of his face, giving him a dangerous look.

Around these seemingly untouchable, exalted beings flittered only their most favored, their personal guards, hunters, assistants or servants.

One of them was of particular interest to me, mostly because of my foreknowledge of his future title: Fen'Harel.

At this point in time he had been Mythal's Pride. A spirit-born, whom she favored greatly. His wild red-brown hair was held back with a circlet. Compared to the people surrounding him he seemed moderately humble, dressed in simple dark and lighter green tunics with silver stitching. He looked altogether composed and calm and irritatingly smug, as if he knew more than anyone around him. Cocky, handsome, future Egg! How dare he look so handsome!

That evening would be the only time I saw all of them together, as the tensions were already beginning. Lower class citizens became servants, the servants became slaves. They lost their status as employees, as citizens and as persons. They were seen as playthings for nobles, objects! For someone whose nanny and gardener and cook and maids had become her family, Sylva was outraged by this development.

After a particularly nasty ball she went back into the family mansion and talked to her former nanny.  
And so both she and I got a full account of how the vanity of the creators and their pet nobles spread, bringing misery, slavery and poverty to the common folk. News spread about a poison from the void, which had been brought to the people by Andruil and her hunting trips. A madness spread through the Evanuris and the conflicts got worse by the day.

Some slaves spoke of rebellion, of freedom and reconstruction. A wolf shaped spirit had begun to free some of them. When he freed slaves during one of her hunts Andruil cursed him a rebellious mutt. Soon after the name Fen'Harel was whispered among the downtrodden and outcast with hope and reverence.  
The Rebel wolf, freeing slaves and saving people. Another player in the political power struggle.

In the end it was Sylva's decision to gain some distance from the political arena, while I would have gotten involved. She chose to become a guardian for the dreamers. And so we served in different locations watching over the oldest of the elvhen in their long sleep.

Our competence soon gained us privileges and higher positions. We started to command and train others. With our experience we gained confidence in ourselves and trust from others around us. This is how we found ourselves in the temples in Bresili'An. Occasionally a noble asked for our service by name and for short periods we would be bodyguards or champions. Twice in that time we received a personal task from Lady Mythal, a great honor according to some. For us it offered the opportunity to help the people and gain more experience in the political stage.

In my time away my brother took over the family management. It went well until the civil war broke out. He was too peace oriented and compassionate to survive for long. When the fights reached the city we called our home, he only held out long enough to save many of our household before he was slain in combat.  
What happened to father I did not know.

The twins prospered in their roles as priests. Over time they became more distant and cruel. Every time the family would meet at home, their treatment of family retainers was more and more horrid. Their own slaves were treated even worse. Despite everything their mother could not be more proud. Sylva resolved to stay as far away from them as possible. I agreed.

Sylva tried to remain at a distance when political tension was high, but could not escape the fall out and the civil war. Alliances under the banner of their so called Gods fought over territory and possession of newly found Lyrium. The taint infected most of the upper echelons, making them more aggressive and dangerous than ever before.  
From time to time some Eluvian went dark. Cities were strategically isolated and attacked. Whole areas the size of countries shook under elemental forces summoned by magic. As if the chaos of war was not enough, Fen'Harel's agents added a dash of hit and run attacks to the unstable mixture that was Elvhenan.

The empire descended into absolute chaos.

From time to time Sylva was asked to join the fighting and I went along for the ride even though I never wanted to kill anyone, ever. The only person gaining Sylva's and my support was Mythal, who in her gentle wisdom, tried to diffuse the conflicts. It was all in vain as her own children turned against her.

The story of Sylvanavir's life came to an abrupt halt during her mission in Bresili'An. Due to our position we were tasked with guarding and rescuing dreamers from one of the newer sleeper halls.

It had been a joined project with the Shemlen, the short lived humans from the north, to erect a temple in which their few dreamers would receive training. Our dreamers would instruct theirs on the delicate details of Fadewalking, if they showed the aptitude. Sylva was a competent dreamer herself. In Elvhenan most people could walk the open Fade easily enough. The only difference was the level of aptitude for it.

The Fade was everywhere and manipulating it was second nature to all of the elvhen. However only in our dreaming could we reach the deepest furthest reaches of the Beyond. Many times we used our dreams to befriend spirits, such as Curiosity, Purpose and Command and Sylva's personal favorite, Victory. On rarer occasions we met Valor, Wisdom and Faith. Only once had she seen Glory and Love and Fortune respectively. None of them had been interested in her for Sylva had no ambition for glory, no interest in romantic love and she did not believe in chance.

During our evacuation mission many of the Eluvian had been shattered on purpose. They led to places either in the middle of the war zone or into hostile territory. The few usable escape routes led through some of the crossroads. They were plains of existence created for the sole purpose of connecting, much like a central station would. The plan had but one drawback: Anyone could use the crossroad and so it was that after the first few elves had been sent ahead, hostiles came through the opened mirror passage.

We never found out whether it was coincidence or a planned encounter, but the forces were led by one of my twins. Dressed in robes of deep purple, inlayed with hazy designs and trimmed with bear fur, it could only be a priest of Dirthamen. His face had given us pause. Would he really kill his own sister? While they had never been close, family was still highly valued, above most else in fact.

He gave us the chance to turn and run. If we left and were not caught again we would live.

Running was against our nature though. It would have disgraced and discredited us as an Arcane Knight, as a champion of Mythal. We turned and ran, but not to safety. We managed to kill a large part of his forces and saved another 5 of our charges by sending them through an Eluvian and breaking it behind them.

By then brother had caught up to us and challenged us to a duel. Sylva accepted, but was naïve despite her experience. I could have told her he would not play fair. Instead of fighting magic against magic, will against will, he lured her into a trap. The prepared magic circle underfoot tore her essence from her body and his spell caged her spirit in a crystal prism and it took me along for the ride.

I absolutely loathed being punished for someone else's idiocy. The deed was done and she was lost. And so was I. The world vanished and shrunk into the singular feeling of pressure from all around.

What followed were several years filled with vague impressions. With our magic we could still sense our surroundings. Using our aura we could perceive the echoes from all around like a form of magical sonar. It helped us cope with the disembodiment and sudden loss of all other perceptions.

It all came to an abrupt end when the Fade disappeared. All of a sudden there was no dreaming, no spirits around. The concentration of ambient magic decreased rapidly until it was as good as non-existent. Silence and darkness fell upon us. Sylva,… I was trapped in a metaphysical place of total isolation. The sensual deprivation drove her mad within a few short years. The centuries after splintered her mind and soul. Her spirit decayed.

Time became meaningless until a soft mental touch awakened the rest of her and gave her form. Past met present. Sylvanavir moved on and I took her memories.


	5. Waking up to start a new life

Waking up after I dreamed several centuries' worth of memories, was very disorienting...

I felt different after the experience. I was still me and yet I knew, somehow, there was much more memory stored away in the back of my sub-conscious.

Elpis was missing. He said he would be sacrificed for my continued existence, but somehow I could still feel his essence inside me.  
It connected me strongly to the Fade. I could only guess for now, but I suspect I could partially transform into a spirit of Hope in the Fade.

As I came back to full awareness I noticed my mind went past the physical boundaries of my body. As an ancient elf this had been normal. Sylvanavir's magic had formed like an aura around her. This was the elvhen way of communicating emotions and intentions if one wished to make them known. It seemed as though this trait had followed me into the present time.

My body had changed as well. This new shape now reflected all of me: the human soul, the ancient elvhen memories and the fractures of Hope.  
Before I had been a dead human soul. Essentially my spirit had been a magical construct. It had been easy to siphon ambient magic and change my shape. I knew I had retained these abilities to a minimal degree.

Now I was mortal and yet not, human and elf. My body was seemingly elvhen, if a bit taller and more filled out than Sylva's had been. My hair was longer than before but still red gold in color. My ears ended in delicate points and I felt that my steps were lighter overall.

In order to get used to my new shape I went through several stretching exercises. My sense of balance was a little off for the first few moments, but I got better quickly.

It felt fantastic to be in control again and not tied down by someone else's in-congruent emotional states and moods.

For curiosities sake I recited an elvish poem to get my voice going. Also I wanted to see if I could…

My voice was just a little more melodious, but held the same pitch I had as a human, a high soprano. On another note my elvhen was beautifully smooth.

There and then I decided to take over Sylva's station. From now on I would be Sylvanavir, ancient elf, spirit of Hope and seer of the future of Thedas.

While walking out of the ruins I expanded my Aura, as I had become used to do as an elf. The technique came to an abrupt halt at my shock to find resistance in the very air.  
Then it dawned on me… this was the Veils doing!  
It felt wrong and oppressive and grating to me, when before I had barely noticed it.

It was as if someone had put a wet, heavy, itchy blanket around me. So uncomfortable and stifling.

I could finally really grasp the magnitude of the damage Fen'Harel had caused.  
Concerned I checked on my own magic. I could feel it humming just below my skin as I was used to. As a proper arcane warrior my magic was focused inwards at all times. This enabled me to be much stronger and faster than any other warrior could hope to be.  
The obvious drawback was the utter lack of outwards focused magic. That limited me to spells which worked only on myself or could be activated via touch.

I could heal myself well enough and apply a strong barrier. First chance I got I would try out my idea for a supersensory charm. I would also be able to properly Fade step. As arcane warrior my favorite technique had become Fadeshroud. Being both here and in the Fade at the same time made me nearly impervious to physical damage.

Everything just passed through me. Now with the Veil in place to interfere with my connection, I would need to relearn this technique and probably limit my usage.  
Perhaps I would fall back to elemental touch based spells…

There was also my shapeshifting ability, which was something to be proud of.

As far as a magical repertoire went it was decent. Certainly leagues beyond any past and present circle mage.

Leaves brushed my skin as I silently stalked the paths of the old forest. I was headed in a general northbound direction, aiming for the open lands of Ferelden.

I could not help but sigh at the muted saturation of my surroundings.  
The world around me felt…less… everything. Like someone had taken my favorite painting, added bleach and removed some of its color.

With growing horror I remembered that here, in the forest, the Veil was actually weaker than elsewhere. It was truly disconcerting and I decided I had to do something about it. This Veil had to go, but a breach would not help me at all. If I wanted to do this properly I would need to make plans.

I needed a network of people, resources and money. It was time for me to get to work.

But first I needed to find out how long I had been asleep and where I could earn a wage with my fighting talent?

I had fallen into hibernation just as the 5th Blight had come to a close. Depending on their choices there could be a warden queen or not, or perhaps one of the wardens had taken up post in Amaranthine.

Using that connection might not be a bad start. At least it would give me a direction and some reliable information. And who knows maybe the Grey wardens needed trainers or captains as well?

Getting from Bersilian to the northern coast of Ferelden would be quite a track on foot, but I had another way… Gathering my magic around me I shifted into my wolf form.

A white wolf with black vine markings stood proud and tall in the clearing I had just occupied. It felt really good to reassume this form, after what felt like ages away from the forest life.

The next hour was spent just doing silly things, like catching raindrops with my snapping jaws and jumping over every available, fallen tree trunk. The sheer joy I felt at my freedom was addictive.

Once I regained my focus I directed myself out of the forest and set a fast pace north.

It did not take long for me to reach the outskirts of the forest. From here on out I would enter the Hinterlands and central Ferelden. While wolf packs were not uncommon in Ferelden, I doubt anyone would dismiss a giant white wolf running at full speed across the country. To avoid unnecessary attention I slowed my pace. I stuck to the wilder areas, the tree covered hills and made use of the cover of night.

Even with my precautions a 6 foot tall wolf was really attention grabbing. Fortune was on my side though and I did not encounter any travelers or bandits along my way.  
Not until I reached the great road, which connected Denerim and Orzammar. It was after all the fastest and most direct connection through Ferelden, east to west.

My luck decided to run out abruptly and with a leap across a rock formation deposited me in a camp of Templars.

To their credit only half of them squeaked in terror at my presence.  
The rest got their bearings back quickly and went into a battle formation. Out of curiosity I decided to use a magic infused howl. It worked like a charm, pun intended.  
3 Templars went down, paralyzed and bleeding from the ears. 2 more had to wince badly and stumbled back. The last was clever and noticed my use of Mana. I saw him raise his blade and shield and… &"%($)"!"* That hurt!

My first introduction to a Templar's smite was painful. I felt like he had cut of my air supply, while covering me in fire ants. Horrible, nasty, wrong, wrong, wrong soooo wrong!  
In my pained haze I belatedly realized I had transformed back and now had to fight the 3 Templars in my elvhen form.  
Focusing on drawing my Mana inwards helped ward of the horrible feeling of the nullification around me. I grabbed a sword from one of the men who were cringing on the floor, bleeding form several orifices.

I had never held a weapon in my old life but now years, decades of training kicked in. As the Templars attacked I automatically parried. I dodged a few swipes of their shields, deflected their swords where I could. I was overall more nimble then them. Especially considering their heavy armor. Technically I could outrun them, but I was pissed off and my pride was wounded, so I fought.

Putting a hand on one chest plate I created purple, crackling arcs of lightning. Their armor might be padded but an overload from a short distance would get through no doubt.  
The guy went down and I cringed at the smell of burned flesh and singed hair.

Templar number 2 came at me shouting enraged. Until now I had barely understood their shouts. My brain was still seemingly hardwired for elvhen.

Adrenaline kicked in and my perception sharpened. I made out no less than 5 mistakes in his stance. Anger made you stupid during battle. It left you open, as this Templar now noticed with my blade piercing through his exposed armpit.  
Angling the blade just right, you can get past both armor and ribcage and skewer your opponent.

My blade got stuck and I was weaponless once more. I turned to face my last adversary, a rogue. He had my undivided attention and thus could not sneak attack. Desperately he went for a frontal assault. With his speed and critical hit affinity, this would have worked on any other normal mage. However I was his opponent and I was not a normal mage.  
I waited for the right moment, took a wide step forward ducking my head under his blow and brought my hands up. My palm met his chin in a fluid uppercut and he was out like a light.

The end of the fight was as anticlimactic as its beginning had been abrupt. At least it reminded me to stay cautious. Seeing as my clothing were in a state of disrepair and I had no weapons, I decided to loot the Templars.

I took the rogue leather armor (sans Templar emblem, thank you very much) and 2 shiny long daggers.

The way the battle went got me thinking. They must have been recruits or I must be better trained than I expected. With any luck the remaining men would not remember my face for future reference. They should be grateful I let them live.

Leaving the camp behind me I made my way towards the street and turned east, aiming for Amaranthine.

I reached the city of Amaranthine, 15th of Harvestmere 9:31 Dragon, by chantry reckoning (it was like October or something).

Snapping up gossip in the alleys, at the chantry board and in the tavern, I concluded that the proceedings of Dragon Age Awakening had already passed.  
Most wardens had survived the Battle of Denerim. Elissa Cousland had married Alistair Therein and thus they had become Queen and King of Ferelden.  
Warden Theron Mahariel had been given Command over the Warden Headquarters of Vigil's Keep.

Faren Brosca had sacrificed himself to slay the Archdemon atop of Fort Drakon. He had been declared Hero of Ferelden by the new King and Queen. The Assembly at Orzammar had decided, despite his Duster origin, to proclaim him Paragon. The Grey order had collected his body and send it to Weisshaupt with all honors.

In the last few months Warden Commander Mahariel had held back a second wave of Darkspawn and saved both the Arling of Amaranthine and the Warden outpost. Not only that, the mysterious curse of the Blackmarch had been lifted as well. Someone had apparently kept busy.

I still did not know how I felt towards the Dalish in general, but Theron had been a sceptic. Furthermore anyone who puts up with Morrigan cannot be closed minded to new knowledge. In light of these facts I decided to take my chances with him. Honestly, forging new bonds with the remnants of my now new people was important if I wanted to go through with my plan.

While in the city I made use of the social invisibility of elven faces and ran a few errands for coin. With that I stayed at a cheap inn for 2 nights and collected some meager supplies for my trip to Vigil's keep. I probably did not need it, but it was mainly for appearances when I eventually reached the warden outpost.

It was only a one day march from Amaranthine to Vigils keep. On the road I joined some merchants. As they chattered I could make out that they were headed for Vigil's Keep to resupply the strongholds stocks. After a while the keep became visible on the hills in the distance.

By nightfall we reached the gate. I was lucky to have joined the traders for we were let into the compound without any trouble. In the inner court of the keep the merchants set up their carts and went through inventory. I helped where I could out of gratitude.

Again my unmarked elven face worked in my favor. Everyone here just assumed I was a servant, even my weapons went largely unnoticed.

"Come along lass," one of the traders called to me, "the steward has some guest rooms in reserve for us. There should be an empty cot for you with the servant quarters."  
I hunched my shoulders, nodded meekly and seemingly disappeared in the crowd.  
For now I was tired enough to just go with the flow. I was directed to the servant quarters and found an empty spot to rest.

Instead of sleeping I meditated and spread out my aura to feel for any anomalies. Unfurling my aura was both immensely relaxing as it was disturbing. It felt like popping your back after a long journey in too small seats. The air around me felt too stale and dry. The side effect of the Veil was uncomfortable, but by now I was almost used to it. I imagine this is what it would be like to lose a sense of perception or a limb. It felt horrible and limiting and yet you get used to it. Taking a deep breath and forced myself into a deep sleep.

In the Fade I let the events of the past several months fly by. I barely learned anything new. The only thing of note was appearance of wisps, which would become regular spectators of my dealings in the Fade.

In the morning I was taken by another elf to get a small breakfast in the kitchen. Apparently the servants were not allowed to eat with the rest of the people working here.

After my snack I snuck out of the kitchen and went down a few corridors into the main hall.

When I reached the end of a larger hall I was stopped by a guard.

"Halt! You have no business here. Go back to your duties." He made a kind of shooing motion with his hands.  
"I do not have any duties here, human. I am looking for Theron Mahariel. I was informed that he had become Warden Commander of Vigil's Keep. Was that not correct?" I gave the guard an unimpressed look.

His cheeks flushed in embarrassment.

"Now see here knife-ear, if we just let anyone in to see the commander …" His voice kept rising.

"What is going on here?" a smoky, soft voice came from behind.  
I turned to see an elderly man with fine clothes walking up to us.

"Ah, no sir, I just… This elf was just about to walk into the off bounds area and…"

"Excuse his fumbling sir. Am I correct in assuming that you are the steward of this keep, or at least working for him? I am here to see Theron Mahariel of Clan Sabrae. Could I ask for an appointment at his earliest convenience?"

The guard looked completely confounded. The steward was mildly impressed with my little speech.

"I am indeed the steward. What shall I tell the commander about who is wanting to see him?"

"My name is Sylvanavir, but he probably remembers me as the daughter of the Lady of the Forest. You may announce me as such."

"Very well. I will send a servant to inform you when your meeting will be. Until then, is there anything you will be needing?"

"No thank you. I will be content using the training grounds outside and dine with the elven servants." I gave him a nod and walked out of the hall.

As I walked around the Keep I quickly got annoyed at all the useless corridors. When I got tired of finding my way out I found the next window and jumped out.

I landed softly on the balls of my feet and looked around. Some guards looked at me weirdly, but I just cocked an eyebrow in askance.

Had no one ever jumped out of a window here?

In any case I ignored the stares and looked for the training grounds. There was an open area on the north side of the keep where a few guards went through sword forms.  
Good enough for me. I started running laps around the training yard. My running started out as a slow jog, but every round I increased in speed.

I ran until I felt a pleasant burn in my legs and went over to stretching.  
Normal stretches were boring after a while so I went over to some Yoga stances.

As the afternoon rolled around I could see more and more guards joining the training exercises at the edge of the yard.  
After a short break from my Yoga I decided to also go through sword forms.

I stood up straight, took a deep breath and closed my eyes to focus.

Slowly and precisely I went through Sylvanavir's forms. From the back of my mind, where I knew my elvhen memories to be, the knowledge of sword fighting just came to me.  
It translated immediately and effortlessly to bodily movements. It was a fascinating progress to note.

I kept my first few forms simple, starting with hand to hand combat. After going over the forms slowly I then went through them combat speed.  
The next set of forms I unsheathed my twin blades for. They were too short for my tastes. Maybe I could sell these or swap them out with another set at the blacksmiths later. Wade and his hubby were here at the keep weren't they?

After I got used to the weight and length of these weapons I became more fluent in my movements. I lost myself in training and sunk into my memory of previous practice fights.

My movements became a dance of precision and grace.  
I might have misstep 4 or 5 times, but nobody would notice anyway.

What I had not realized is that my training had drawn a crowd of onlookers.

I finished my exercise and got some applause for it…. An audience of soldiers was close by giving me admiring looks for my performance.  
It felt a little awkward. However I figured, if I wanted to work here I would have to work with them so… Keep calm and carry on, as they say.

I granted them a small smile and an artistic bow, which got some laughs.

Now all I needed was a bit of shade so I could sit and meditate.

I jaunted over to the side of the keep. There would be shadows here for the next few hours at least. I sat down enjoying the cool stone against my back and closed my eyes.

My aura spread around me. I took deep breaths and focused inwards. I tried my hardest to restrict my aura. I drew it closer and closer and imagined it as a second skin.

My Mana circulated within me sharpening my senses and granting me a clearer mind. In this mindset I doubt anyone could match my willpower.

A cough broke out of my reverie. "Excuse me … milady. The commander bade me to send for you. He made time for you immediately after he heard your name."

I opened my eyes and startled the young boy they used as a messenger. "Thank you. Shall I follow you then? I admit I have trouble navigating the keep."

"Sure lady." I got a bright grin from him.

I sprang up and dusted myself off. Time for an interview.  
We went through the yard and in through the main entrance. I tried to remember the way: through the corridor with the dog-lord paintings, through the audience hall, up a staircase in the right corner, down a small corridor towards a random door… forget it.

The lad went right up to it and gave it two good knocks.

"Come in." a muffled voice replied from inside.

"There you go miss." A toothy grin was the last thing I saw before the messenger boy ran down the corridor. I stepped into the office schooling my face to look pleasant yet neutral.

The room was very cozy considering its function. Red rugs, dark wooden furniture and 2 short braziers made for a very warm decoration. Above the desk which was overflowing with stationary hung a Grey warden sigil. From behind the desk I received a critical stare from a pair of hazel eyes.

Theron Mahariel looked older, more haggard in appearance then last I saw him. He had been through so much in such a short time. Deep roads, war, trials, political plots, invasion, 2 or 3 high dragons and a Magister darkspawn… No wonder he looked so tired. As opposed to openly hostile however he now seemed cautious and mildly curious about my visit.

"Is life as a commander of the Grey treating you well, Mahariel?" I decided that I would lead this conversation.

"Urgh" he rubbed his hand over his forehead.

"Give me an Archdemon over mountains of paperwork any day. At least the beast I could shoot out of frustration." A small smile was on both our faces.  
"And how about you, creature of the forest? I admit I was curious about the introduction by my steward. He announced you as the daughter of the lady of the forest. I remember you, but not as an elf…"  
"It is true I am quite a ways from Bresilian. As for my form… this is me. I can, however, change into other forms as well. Under the circumstances of our last meeting a human image seemed safer. I can also become a great wolf if you prefer?" "No thanks." Came his quick and deadpan reply.

"So what brings you to the north of Ferelden?"

"Information and companionship if you can believe it. I felt cut off from the world. With the lady and the werewolves gone and no Dalish clans around I got lonely. I also was curious what became of your little troupe and needed to get the latest news. I heard Elissa and Alistair got married and crowned. The dwarf is a hero now. Sten returned to Par Vollen. The former crow is going round killing proper ones and the red-headed bard has returned to Orlais. Also a Dalish hunter is now a Grey Warden commander. You were closest and most accessible so I came to visit."

As I was talking, Mahariel nodded along and frowned a little less with each person I mentioned.

"You are oddly well informed. The way you said you want to visit me…it sounds so mundane, when it is everything but normal. What do you need?"

I could see in his eyes he was prepared for yet another person giving him a list of problems to solve. Another quest for him to go and complete.

Well, not today good ser.

"I need a job." is what I said straight to his face.  
"Say what?" Mahariel blinked confused.  
"I wish to work for you. Whatever you need, within reason. You will see that I am a very capable aid to have."  
"Could you elaborate?"

"I want to cross the sea to visit someone in the Free Marches, but I lived in the forest until now. I am completely broke. I am a capable warrior, but I am also a mage. Technically that makes me an apostate in the Chantry's eyes. I'd rather not have to kill a dozen or so Templars for them to get the message that I am not Circle material. I know the Grey wardens employ mages from time to time and I would not stick out much so I came here. I am offering my services to you."

"That has to be the most straight forward way anyone ever advertised themselves…" Mahariel looked at me with a sense of disturbed wonder. As if he is trying to figure out how I am not dead yet.

"While I am impressed, I am not sure letting you impersonate a warden is a good idea though."

"You misunderstood me Commander. I will be working for _you_ , not the order. If you need to know what I am capable of… I am an arcane warrior, the old kind. Without the robes and the staff and the fireball-in-your-face kind of attitude of a normal mage. Even Templars would not recognize me. I just like to play it safe. Let me train your guards and wardens. If you have no need of that, let me be your secretary. I am after all intimately familiar with the intricacies of administrative paperwork."

"Right. So much paperwork in the wild forests of Ferelden." He gave me a sceptic look.  
"I was not always a wild apostate living in the woods, thank you very much."  
"So a sword and secretary for hire?" Mahariel contemplated.  
"Take it or leave it." I was slightly annoyed at how much time it took to convince him.

"I do not need any more soldiers, but someone to help with non-sensitive paperwork… What qualifications do you have as a trainer or guard captain?"

Really?! He went there?

"I have been trained from a young age to take down opponents efficiently and discreetly. I have been a champion to nobles and a captain of a temple guard, also I have fought in a civil war."  
"What? Where? I do not recall any recent civil wars that could fit your age group."

"It was before your time Dalen. I am much older than I appear. Anything about my personal affairs I might share with you once we get to know each other better. I am sure you agree that sharing this kind of information requires trust."

"I can see how you have been with nobles before. You have the same manner of making me agree with what you are saying, without undermining what I think. Sneaky."

"Ideally, Mahariel, you tell people what they want to hear, in a manner that gets them to do what you want." I stressed the point with a slightly mean smile.

"Very well. I can see your value and determination. For now I would like you to watch the guard and the wardens when they train, evaluate them and adjust their training accordingly. I can't have them falling apart the moment I am not present. Also I require your help with this on every other day." He gestured widely to the stacks of documents all around him.

"Understood commander. If you should ever have the wish to spar, come and find me. You could also benefit from evaluation and training…" Mahariel gave a nod in admittance.  
"I would like that. As to your payment. Your room and food within the keep are included, as you serve not only the wardens, but also the Arling of Amaranthine. You will receive a modest pay in royals at the end of the week. Any kind of travel on my behalf is paid for by the order. Any private purchases or travel plans have to be paid by you. Also … behave yourself lest you disgrace the order. Are we clear?"

I regarded him with more respect now. He seemed to have matured quite a lot and naturally grew into a fine leader.

"Crystal." He held out a hand and I shook it. The deal was sealed. Written contract not required apparently, the commander will stay true to his words.

"Looking forward to working with you." He gave me a smile.  
"Same, commander." I gave him a salute. He grinned and returned to his paperwork, allowing me to leave and start with my new job.

Life at the Warden HQ was surprisingly comfortable, once I got used to the new routine. I found that I could get a sadistic type of glee, to go all drill sergeant on human males, thinking themselves heroes. While I was aware that flexibility is not main objective of plate and chainmail armor, it can give anyone an advantage in battle regardless. So I put the soldiers through their paces, both stamina and dexterity wise. Efficient dodging and precise blows save more energy and make for quicker fights. I made them run and jump and climb and press, any type of weather, any time of day.

To them I must have been evil incarnate. On the other hand I was also their commanding officer and demanded respect. I never asked for more than I knew they were capable of. Also I made sure to demonstrate all exercises myself.

Say what they will but everyone saw their massive improvement within the last 2 months.

Mahariel was a bit cold to me at first, but it is hard not to get to know a person you spend every second afternoon with.

I am sure I earned brownie points for my massive help with paperwork.

Also, practice sessions in the training yard build camaraderie.  
In our breaks we started chatting, first about training and techniques, later about our respective lives.

I told him about my life in Bersilian and he told me about his training and childhood in Clan Sabrae.  
His spin on the stories of Keeper Marethari and First Merill were interesting. I knew he was happy to have another elf at his side. The only other Dalish around was Velanna and she had been exiled from her clan.

The definitive moment I knew he trusted and valued me as his friend was when he talked about his dead comrade Tamlen. The experience and loss was still real to him, even a year after it happened.

In the chaos of the Blight nobody had gotten enough time to deal with their personal issues and emotions, least of all the Wardens.

Now he had the time to confront his feelings and it helped to simply talk to me about it. I offered all the silent support I could. In my experience people rarely ever want to hear your opinion or any solution to their problems. They just want to vent, let it all out, without being judged.

Of course our close relationship also gave him insights to my person.  
From the very beginning he knew some of my stories did not match my wild elf/non Dalish background. His constant needling for answers got him enough clues as to my true nature. Well truer nature, I do not believe anyone would ever find out my otherworldly origins. Most of the time I stayed true to my nature and personality and simply omitted facts about my past.

Should have known it would not work on Theron. (Yes Theron, we were on first name basis)

One day he decided to confront me about my past. So I told him I was an ancient.  
An elf of Elvhenan awoken from slumber.

He looked torn between elation and having swallowed a sour grape. Of course he tested my knowledge. So I told him snippets of old elvhen life. The stuff I remembered from Sylvanavir's memory. The more I shared, the more fascinated and convinced Theron became.

Mythals mercy did I hate to delusion him.

Of course I told him about the beautiful ad amazing things. I mentioned architecture and magic and festivals and balls and rituals of everyday life.

The turning point of the conversation was when I asked him "If we all were elves back in the day… who did the labor? Who worked the mines, smithies? Who washed up and scrubbed the floor?"

That brought him up short. Magic? Golems? He tried to find any alternative then the obvious truth.

"Elves were everything Theron. Elves were nobles and commoners and servants and even slaves."

He swallowed hard and I sighed ready for the final verbal attack.

"You probably noticed that despite my heritage and nobility I am not wearing Vallaslin. There is a reason for that. The marks are honoring the Evanuris, whom you call creators and think of as gods. Nobles would display them on the lesser members of their household. They are markings of servitude, only slaves had them."

At that point his grip smashed the glass he had been holding and he stood wordlessly.  
Rage and disappointment were visible on his face. Then he turned and left. And I let him.

He needed to put his thoughts in order. Either he denied all I had said and I would lose a good friend or he would accept and move on and become stronger for it.

He did not speak to me for 2 weeks. I complied with his wish for silence and waited for him to come to me. When he did, he came with a request.  
"Sylvanavir." He spoke my name carefully and confident.

"The Dalish swore never again to submit. You have told me the marks we proudly wear to honor our past are slave markings. You made me doubt all I have grown to love as my culture. I almost envy the flat-ears for their bare faces…. I… what else have we gotten so horribly wrong? A few years ago I would have tried to kill you for such blasphemy, but I am wiser now. Please teach me both the good and the bad of the past. Tell me … can you remove them?" and he looked at me with such conviction as he said it, but I could perceive the deep sorrow behind his eyes.

"There is a way. However… I never learned it. That magic belonged to a Rebel." Theron was both hopeful and sad to hear it.  
"Can you research it? Maybe replicate the spell?"  
"I will try to find information in the Dreaming." He nodded absentminded.  
"I wish to apologize for my behavior lately. It was unprofessional of me to treat you as if you were air." His feet shuffled from side to side and his ear tips went red.

"No need for the guilt and shame. You handled the situation with more poise than I expected. You were distraught and I apologize for making it so. You are of course forgiven."  
"My thanks. If you do not mind… could I ask more questions?"

He looked so childish that moment I could not help but laugh.

"Yes you can dalen." He pouted and then smiled "Whatever… ancient one."

Our relationship turned from good to great afterwards. He had a lot more respect for me and I accepted him as lethellan. Honestly it was as if I had gained a younger brother. And Theron was infinitely preferable to the terrible twin menaces of my elf life. It was still a new experience for me since I had been an only child in my human life time. I felt good as a big sister figure.

The two of us continued with our martial training and added a few more lectures to our routine. I taught him more of our culture and he proved to be very insightful in his comments.  
We also started him on language training. When he tried to complain about his extra homework, I replied with a question.

"How will you truly understand our culture if you cannot understand what we said and why we say it?" He relented his whining and became quite a dedicated study.

"At some point we should include Velanna in these lectures of yours. She is a former First and quite adapt at living outside of Dalish preconceptions. She is scheduled to return from the Kokari Wilds in a weeks' time." Theron shuffled some papers around as he mentioned the other Dalish elf of the Grey order.

I gave his idea some serious thought.

I could not raise a nation on my own. At some point I would need agents and contacts. Velanna, if I remember correctly from the game, had keeper magic. Conjuring and growing vines and focusing on earth based attacks.  
She was also a very curious and studious character, according to the comments of multiple inhabitants of Vigil's Keep.

"Why not." I answered finally.

"It will give you something to do when I am gone." He shuffled more papers and avoided eye contact.

"Gone? Where is it you're off to? Official business?" Admittedly I was curious. Of course if my math was correct, I had a hunch as to where he was going, but you can never be too sure.

"It is of a more personal nature. The steward is informed and will run daily operations with you. Are you good to take over the paperwork and leave the soldiers to their business?"  
"Absolutely. I have whipped them into shape real good. There will be no problems." After all I was confident in my skill as trainer.

"Will you go alone though?" I added after a moment.  
"Worried?" he added teasingly.  
"With you? Always." I replied equally amused.  
"Harsh." he joked.  
"Realistic." I replied deadpan.

Our one word battle ended here when Theron got serious again. "I will be taking Barkspawn with me. He should be good at sniffing out threats … and people." He added the last bit silently. "I will leave tomorrow morning and hopefully be back before the weather turns frigid."  
"You mean more frigid." I corrected sarcastically. I could not help it. He smiled at me.

" _Travel safely brother._ I would hate to see all my efforts to train you wasted because of your clumsiness."  
" _I love you too ancient one_. And don't worry too much or you'll get grey hair." He made a show of looking at my hair in concern.

"You have 5 seconds to get a head start Theron." I gave him a glacial glare. No one made ancient age jokes with me…. "The paperwork though…" now he looked hesitant. "Five."  
I said and he was already out the door by four. I shook my head. "All serious one moment and a kid in the next." A sigh escaped my lips and then I smiled once more.

He was a good friend and I wished him all the luck in the world on his future quests. Now that he was gone though, I would use the extra time to get my own quests planned out. Most of what I could do was limited by either time or resources. After finishing Theron's paperwork in record time, I sat down with 2 leather bound journals of my own and wrote down all I could remember about the Dragon Age games in chronological order. Then I wrote down little helpful facts about places, items and people that I could remember. Of course this would be dangerous if anyone ever found and read it, so I wrote in ancient elvhen script.

My second journal was my Questlog, as I called it. Anything and everything I needed to achieve and what steps I needed to take to do it was in there.

My end goal… stop the end of the world as Thedas knows it.

How to do that? Be quicker than the Rebel wolf, who will be waking up in some 10 years or so…

What to accomplish: Create an independent elvhen nation, empower and educate the elven people, bring down that thrice cursed veil construct ASAP

What I need: money, people to work for me, Eluvian, fade barrier stones, more money, Dalish and city elves working together (I can already feel the headache), powerful friends and allies, non-monetary resources like weapons, armor, trading goods

How to get these things: Get involved and get around

If I was at Hogwarts I would be the most Slytherin there ever was. If my plan was anything it was ambitious (I refuse to think it impossible). I had the time now I just needed to be at the right places at the right time. Efficiency was key.  
I had to wonder though how much of this plan of mine was Sylvanavir's need to restore her people, Hope's purpose or my wish to simply help people and meet all the cool main characters. Perhaps this was a fusion of all of it.

I had around 10 years until the storyline of the inquisition began. I would need a functioning organization and several elvhen settlements until that point. How would I convince people to join my cause though? I had enough charisma to inspire single individuals, but it was different dealing with entire groups of people.  
Magic as incentive was too scary for most. Immortality was both far-fetched and impractical.

The Dalish could probably be persuaded to join for the sake of knowledge and restoration. The city elves would appreciate safety and stable economy and a sense of community. The many elves of Tevinter could be brought into the fold with the guarantee of personal freedom and the possibility of self-expression. Any individual needs would have to be handled accordingly as the situation demands it.

I would need to take care to organize a structured government, with balanced power distribution. Any settlements would have to be geographically isolated and self-sufficient. Most of all I needed to get a network of communication and travel up and running, which is why my first main focus would be the restoration of the Eluvian and the acquisition of contacts.

And so I made a list of places I knew I could find Eluvian and a second list of people I wanted to work with me. If I wanted to get in touch with those people I would need to get into the Circle tower, to Denerim and to Kirkwall to join Hawke's merry band of misfits.

Done with my preliminary planning I sat back in my chair and massaged my head. So much work in my immediate future. The elves better appreciate this!

Exhausted by my brain work I fell asleep in Theron's office. The Fade formed itself according to my memories of this room. Two spirits were waiting for me. One I recognized as a wisp from my training in the Fade, the other was new. Both felt the need to assume a form.

Wispy became a stern looking image of an elvhen woman from Sylvanavir's household, the other became a greenish copy of my former human self.

"Greetings. What is your purpose here?" I addressed them both.

Asking questions of spirits is tricky. Ask a wrong question and they see it as an invitation to your personal space, thoughts, magic, body, you name it. Ask the right questions and you might get seriously weird, unhelpful or convoluted answers. Determining their nature was paramount.

"I am Diligence. I have been watching you and found something kindred in you as you trained your mind and body. It is nice to see so much appreciation for my nature."

"A pleasure Diligence. It is helpful to have you close. Everything that is started should be finished." She gave me a smile and a nod. I now focused on the other me, who now stood with her arms crossed and looking cross.

"You do not know me?! You should! I am here as a direct consequence of your latest thoughts and concerns." Her voice was rough and harsh. Had I sounded like that when I was still human? Please tell me it wasn't so.

"Focus! Or I will leave." She continued.

"That is an empty threat and you know it." Said Diligence.

Green me pouted.

"She is Ambition. To be more precise she was a spirit of Desire, one of the not so friendly ones. By watching you closely she synched with your song and changed according to your desire. Now she is a new spirit of Ambition and linked to you. Both of us wish to help, if you let us." Diligence explained patiently and ignoring Ambitions grumblings from the side.

"Why help me?" I asked, both weary of hidden agendas and at the same time curious about their commitment.

"We stay true to our purpose and you reflect us at the same time. Have you not just come up with the most ambitious plan since Andraste's march on the Tevinter Empire? And have you not just made a detailed plan on how to achieve it in the next 10 years?" Ambition remarked drily.

Diligence nodded animatedly at her comment and added

"We also feel you more closely as you are spirit-born and we wish for you to fulfill your purpose too." Spirit-born? Are they referring to Hope?

I had not tried to actively become a spirit of Hope in the Fade, as I could not anticipate all the possible outcomes and changes. It's risky business. At some point I would have to check though, so why not now. I concentrated on my spiritual essence. I could feel my essence.

I was a blend of human soul and elvhen mind. Looking closer I could feel what was left of my friend Elpis, like a microscopic web of glue holding me together. Now that I found what made me Hope, I focused on it and drew it to the surface. Let it fill me. Let it change me here in the Dreaming….  
It must have worked for I could perceive much more and at the same time much less than before.

I could see paths through the Fade and knew instinctively where they could lead me. I could feel fluctuating powers, both here on our end and in the waking world. These must be the energies emanating from spirits and mages.

The Veil was noticeable from this side as well. It felt like a net holding back my essence from touching the waking world in any significant way. With my new way of perception I could feel the hopes the dreams of the people at Vigil's Keep.

I now better understood how easily spirits could become demons to mortals. If I were to visit their dreams, depending on how they feel about themselves and their lot in life a spirit of hope could mean despair, pride or deep sorrow.

The spirits in front of me had not lost their form per se, but I could make out the aura of their influence and the potential of their nature like a phantom hovering over their shoulder and all around them.

Having had enough of all the new stimuli I reverted to my normal form. Not an easy feat, but I managed. This had been very exhausting.

"A very fascinating experience, seeing you change. Perhaps a spirit of Knowledge or Curiosity will join us soon." Diligence noted.

"What about our offer?" Ambition demanded.  
"I will think on it and tell you when I am ready. Now I need rest." Was all I said before I stepped onto a Fade path and ended up in my clearing. Tired I flopped onto my back and closed my eyes.


	6. Paperwork and Quest-related headaches

A/N Thanks for the kind reviews. It's always thrilling to publish something for many eyes to see... So far this story is halfway done *uses handkerchief to wipe brow*

Part 1 will take place in Ferelden lands only and set a nice base for all the magical nerdiness and political stuff later on. All my magical theories are born from my own musings on comments, party banter and codex entries in all three games and several books. If anyone wants to share their particular brand of fade-nerd-knowledge (gotta coin that term) pm me!

Onward brave readers, paperwork, quest related headaches and redheads ahead!

Back in the waking world, work waited for me. If it wasn't the paperwork, it was the steward with a request or a guest of the keep or some traders wishing to gain entry or the soldiers needing training or something else inane, that could be solved without my help. Seriously can nobody here think for themselves… Urgh.

On the bright side Velanna had returned shortly after Theron's departure. She was back earlier than estimated and was just a little surprised when she reported back to me instead of the usual grumpy elf commander.

Her research of Chasind tribal magic had turned out both good and not so good.  
She found several interesting runic arrays on her travel, which she wishes to try out. On the other hand she agitated no less than 5 camps of Chasind warriors, now running around like a poked beehive. She made it out fine but the next best traveler will be less fortunate.

After her report I reintroduced myself and talked with her about magic and the Dalish and subtly mentioned Theron's and my training sessions and lectures.  
Velanna was similar to Theron in that they were both sceptics, but she seemed much more open to non Dalish ideas and ideals.

We started meditating together and she showed me her Keeper magic. It sung a sad and deep song, resonating in the earth. The side of me that was Hope had the urge to pet the vines and somehow cheer them up. It was slightly annoying.

Velanna was wide eyed when I told her I was an arcane warrior and a proper one at that. She knew of only one other Dalish mage who had attempted to become one. Cillian was his name, a member of another Dalish clan. He had left his Keeper and clan to find the ancient knowledge that led to victory.

Seeing my magic first-hand, Velanna was fascinated. Especially techniques like the Fadeshroud, which I had painstakingly re-perfected. My self-imposed restriction on my magic output seemed to confuse her until I explained to her the importance of will and limitation.

"It is like a stream of water. The wider the riverbed the less force the water will have. If you channel the water through a smaller gap you can create a flood with the strength to crush rock. It is similar to Mana. I choose to restrict myself to channeling Mana within my body alone. It gives my magic a sharper edge and it gives me an incredible amount of control over it."

"So you are saying by specializing in one discipline and consciously choosing not to do anything else our Will, the base of our Mana, becomes more focused? Would that work for anyone?"

"You are a fast learner and yes, it works for anyone. If you, during your meditation, swear to yourself that you will not use any other magic than Keeper magic and Healing spells, you will see a difference in you spell control very soon. It is after all our Will that reaches across the Veil summoning the power to cast spells in the waking world."

"You seem to have much knowledge about the Fade and the workings of magic. I will enjoy learning from you." Velanna's eyes were gleaming with excitement.

Here was a perfect example of an academic.

I chuckled to myself. "Very well, let's begin."

During our lectures I gave her hints and clues to my identity.  
I omitted less and less knowledge from our conversations about elvhen origin and magic.

I hoped it would soften the blow of the revelations I was about to unload on her.

By all accounts, when I told her the same things I had Theron, she reacted much calmer. Instead of running of in silent rage, she decided she would prove me wrong by questioning my every word. Of course her approach backfired for her and helped me prove my point.

As more and more of her questions were answered, she became more and more pensive.

Finally she fell silent and looked at me with shiny eyes. She was close to tears.  
"Is all I have learned from my Keeper false? Is my knowledge and ambition that useless?"

Her voice broke a little in the end.

"No," I told her in a calm but confident tone. "The drive to learn is never a bad thing. And the validity of Dalish knowledge is not up for debate. Enough people believe it to make it relevant. It may not be true to history, but that was to be expected from a people of freed slaves and servants. You, who have been brought to the brink of extinction through human violence. Do not discard you knowledge. Question it, revise it and teach others to do the same."

A little sniff came from her before she regained her calm.

"I will and thank you for telling me. If you were anyone else… I would not have believed you. I still cannot quite accept it."  
"And that is fine. Accept on your own time. If it helps, talk to Theron when he comes back. For now let's move on with training and maybe add ancient elvhen to your curriculum, mhm?" I baited her and she realized it.  
Still she smiled again and her thirst for new knowledge won over. Her drive to learn was stronger than ever.

From that point onwards I included her in some of my planning concerning magical items.

I decided to tell her about the Eluvian and I mentioned the part they played in the story of Merill, Tamlen and Theron.

Velanna seemed to have fond memories of Merill. She explained to me that most Firsts knew each other through smaller gatherings of the Keepers of one particular area and of course through the Arlathvhen.

When she mentioned that her eyes became as wide as diner plates. It was her opinion I absolutely had to appear before all the Keepers and explain to them the same stuff I had told her and Theron.

I saw a few problems with that: First I was not Dalish, meaning I had no invitation. Second even if I got in, nobody would believe me and claim I was a deranged heretic. Also I absolutely hated speaking in front of crowds. I was not bad at it, but I just could not see me sitting down and devising a speech.

Velanna insisted I go. I told her I could not. She told me to get in good with a few Clans and I replied I would think about it. She said she would help me and I promised I would talk to the congregation of Keepers and Firsts and Seconds if she became my agent. Velanna agreed and that was the end of that discussion. She was smiling smugly and I had no clue whether I won this round or lost…

As my first official agent I told her, that her position would involve a lot of research and talking. We needed a way to find, fix and activate Eluvian.

I knew from the games we could gain access to the method of finding them very soon.

For that reason alone I told her to prioritize the repair aspect.

My only hint for her was to keep an open mind. Her reaction to my words was to run off to talk to people the next day. "I have some contacts that might know something." was vaguely what she said before she left.

I had two whole days to myself when Theron came back. He dragged himself in through the mud and the rain outside. There was a mountain of dirt resembling a Mabari trotting behind him. Not only that, but a Dalish warrior was following him in through the front door.  
The young woman was dressed in appropriately green ironbark and leather armor and donned a great sword. If my memory is correct this would be Ariane.

For the moment I ignored our guest and addressed my friend and commander.  
"Right. You need a bath, a meal and then rest. Talk to me tomorrow when you got up and had breakfast, no sooner no later. Understood?" I ordered.  
"Who died and made you boss?" he replied, tired and shivering.  
"No one died, but you did make me your replacement. Now off with you." I made a gesture in the direction of his rooms.

He accepted my proposal and dragged himself up the stairs, while I asked some of the staff to help him out, draw a bath and get him a light meal.

After all was underway, I turned to Ariane.

"My apology for ignoring you until now. If I hadn't been this decisive he would have ignored me and trudged all that mud into the carpet and up to his office."

"No apology necessary I understand your position. What shall I do until the commander is available again?" _s_ he was very controlled, but I could detect hints of her unease.

"Much the same as he is. I will allocate you a room close to my own and you will get a decent meal and rest. We can all reconvene tomorrow, yes?" I put a smile on for good measure. "Very well." Was her stony reply. It will be a long time of trial and error until I could reach anywhere near Josephine's level of diplomacy it seemed.

After Ariane was sent on her way with one of the servants I returned to the office and made sure everything was set for Theron when he returned. For the afternoon I had nothing planned so I indulged in a round of solo exercising.

That night I sought out Diligence and Ambition and accepted their help.  
I told them I would value their input and advice, but I retained the right to simply not use it. Both were fine with that and so our partnership began.

My first task for my Fade Force was to find an old spirit of Wisdom. There should really not be that many of them and I wanted to talk to one very specific friend of a certain wolf.

The next morning I was last to appear in the office.

Theron probably had only a short night's sleep before his sense of duty caught up with him. Ariane seemed to think whatever she was here for was more important than sleep or food and so had opted to skip breakfast. How did I know that?

The staff was on my side and told me so. I brought some bread, cheese and fruit to snack on and sat in one of the 4 available chairs in the office.

My offering gained much approval from Theron who gave me a grateful smile. Ariane did take some food, but seemed rather indifferent about my gesture of goodwill.

"When will we set out again? The longer we wait the more difficult she will be to track." Was the first thing out of her mouth... charming.  
"Tracking? Who?" my eyes found Theron's across the table.

"Morrigan." He answered slightly wistful.

"The daughter of Flemeth, huh? Not an easy individual to track. What is your involvement?" this time I addressed Ariane.

"She stole a precious relic, which had been entrusted to my clan. Keeper Solan tasked me with retrieving it." She frowned.

"What kind of item?" She was conflicted about telling me I could tell.

"It is a book, filled with ancient writing." Theron answered for her.

"Not just any book! It is an original piece of our history! Have you been removed from your clan from so long you have forgotten such significance?"

Ariane turned red with anger.

"It is an old book, which you cannot even read. For all we know it talks about the progress of making chamber pots." Theron drily added.

Oh dear… Telling him about our history has made him really cynical of all things to do with Dalish Lore…

Oh well, time to defuse the situation.

Before Ariane could get a heart attack on account of high blood pressure I intervened.  
"What is that book ostensibly about?" She swallowed some of her anger.

"The keeper said it's about the Eluvian." Her voice was flat.

"Interesting. Is your clan in possession of one?" At this question Ariane for a moment forgot she was angry and looked at me curiously and worried.

"You know… the witch aske the exact same question. I know she must have researched them to even find our clan, but how and what do you know of the Eluvian?"

"I know that the word itself simply means 'looking glass' or 'mirror'.

I also know many people believe they are simply there to communicate across large distances, which is false. It is a rarity to find a working one. Most are broken and many others require a great deal of knowledge and power to activate…. Or a key."

Now both elves looked at me in interest and anticipation.  
"How I know those things is not for you to know Dalen, but I would suggest going to the circle of magi. They have the most comprehensive library on all things magic. Perhaps they will have a way to find the closest intact Eluvian."  
"Why should we be looking for one?" Ariane asked. "We are looking for a witch, not a mirror."

"Watch your tone please. She is not a bad person despite your thoughts on her way of acquiring the book." Theron said to her sternly.

"She is a thief and she will remain one until she returns what she took." Was the final comment from Ariane on the matter.

Theron sighed in frustration and looked back to me. "How will this help us hahren?" he seemed a little too defeated by his inability to find her.  
"Well, why would an ambitious mage like Morrigan look for a book on the Eluvian, if she had no wish to find one and try it out? It seems the logical next step to me."

I could basically see the lightbulbs turning on over their heads.  
"If we find the mirror we find Morrigan." Ariane concluded.

"Will you come with us? You are the most knowledgeable in the field of ancient magic and magic items. It will be much quicker with your input on matters."

My young student asked of me. How could I not agree?

"Very well. I shall. Give me a moment to collect my gear and I shall meet you at the gate, lethalin."

Theron glowed under the subtle praise and Ariane did not quite know what to make of me anymore. Before I had been a flat-ear.

Now, I was a flat-ear with much knowledge about ancient elvhen artifacts and a lauded Dalish hero's respect. I also spoke the peoples tongue fluently.

Quite a conundrum.

Theron's good mood and Ariane's skepticism kept up all the way to Lake Calenhad and the Circle tower of Magi.  
Unfortunately I was stuck in the middle.

The first time I saw the Tevinter structure jutting out of the still waters of the lake I was impressed. The architectural design was elegant and utilitarian.

Certain elements reminded me of older versions of elvhen temples.

So enthralled was I with the sight, I did not notice the 2 Templars that came up from the lakeside to greet us. I simply let Theron do the talking and followed him onto the boat.

I was amazed at Theron's obvious comfort and authority.  
He walked into the tower like he owned the place. As soon as we went over the threshold the 2 Templars turned and walked back to the boat. 3 new ones replaced them.

One of them was slightly taller and had much more grey hair.

Must be the Templar commander Greg….something?  
Theron seemed to know him and the commander addressed him with all the greetings and formalities. I just blended in with the background and watched.

When all was said and done we got permission to peruse the circle library.

Ariane was uncomfortable, whether that was because of the many mages, many warriors in shiny armor or the lack of space, I could not tell.

She was however amazed when she first saw the sizable collection of books.

It was tempting to just go off and read several of the more obscure arcane tomes, but alas. We focused on finding anything about elvhen artifacts. It took us a good while but we eventually found a book titled "Catalogue of arcane Relics".

The document was brittle and almost fell apart. Only one annotation talked about elven mirrors in possession of Tevinter magisters.  
All of us were frustrated at the lack of useful information. In a moment of rage Ariane knocked over a tall stack of books. One of them caught my eye. It was written in many languages, Tevinter Common, Orlesian and Elvhen among them. As I flipped through the book I picked up on some chapters talking about methods of scrying.

"This one could help us. Theron see if you can find a mage or a codex that can help us translate certain passages of this text." I threw him the book.

He threw me a significant look and took Ariane to find a codex. While the 2 were away I checked for any literature I might want to read up on.

In no time my stack of promising reads included "Dreamwalking", "Fortikum Kadats", "Talismans of Ancient Tevinter", "Guarding of the Mind", "The Elvhen Varterral", "Faith and Justice" and "Seeing beyond Sight".

There was also a blood speckled tome which should not have been openly available in the first place. It had an interesting list of names of spirits and their hierarchy.

I was halfway through that book when Theron and Ariane returned with a wimpy looking mage scuttling behind them. After giving the mageling a once over I was not impressed and it must have shown on my face.

"This is Finn. He helped translate the passages about scrying spells. As long as we have a shard we could use an elvhen place of power to find the closest complete Mirror." Theron mentioned.  
"Yes, well in theory. We would need an incomplete piece in the first place." Finn said. He even had a whiny voice…  
"I know where we can obtain a piece." Theron murmured and I knew what was going through his head at that moment.

"Do you wish for company Theron?" I asked, concern coloring my voice.

"No need. I shall be fine." He waved me of.

"I know someone who can help with the place of power." Finn fidgeted.

"There is a statue in the repository with great knowledge… We would need to get a permission of the First Enchanter."

This guy was giving me a headache and I had no patience to run around on little side quests. "Urgh. Go do your thing Theron. I will remain here with my new friends. Have fun talking to a trapped spirit." I gestured to my accumulated pile of reading material and then made a shooing motion. The elf commander nodded, used to my oddity.

His two new tag-alongs seemed a bit put out by my rebuffing attitude. However they followed Theron out anyhow.

"Oh and Theron… watch out. The Veil is disturbed in this tower. Too many holes were ripped into it as of late. I will go into the upper levels and see what I can do to stabilize it after I finish my book."

"I will be careful, ma serannas Sylva."

After my interests in my books were quenched, I felt it was time to live up to my word.

I made a note and left it with my pile.

As I wandered the upper floors I found many places in need of warding.

The easiest and safest method available to me was to place warding glyphs into the very stone.

Focusing on my inner power I called forth the memory of arcane fire to my hand.

The Veilfire burned green and blue in my hand. With my index finger I inscribed the sequences of glyphs into the wall. Once the warding circle was completed it flashed green like the sky of the Fade and then became invisible to the naked eye.

And so I went floor by floor. The atmosphere became less oppressive as I proceeded. The entire floor felt clearer, cleaner when I finished my work.

As far as my obscure magical rescue mission went, I was stealthily enough to escape Templar notice. However by watching out for Templars I forgot to monitor the Mages around me.

"What exactly do you think you're doing?" to my shame I jumped in surprise. Turning around I saw a red headed elf with odd tattoos (thankfully no Vallaslin). She glared most impressively too.

"Well hello to you too." Came my sarcastic greeting. Her brows furrowed further.

"You are sneaking about inscribing runes on OUR walls and now you're trying to be smart with me?" she complained reproachfully.

"And I suppose you are the owner of this tower and the official guardian of all things magic-related?" I put my chin up and tilted my head sideways in a charming manner.

"Also for your information, I do not have to try to be smart. I know I am. As for the glyphs, if you cannot tell I am actually helping, you have no business interrupting."

"Prove it!" she almost shouted at me. Her face was as red as her hair.

"Neria what are you doing?" Oh great another one.

"Not now Lysas! This strange mage is doing something suspicious to our walls and…"  
"Well now Neria…" I interrupted her newly started rant "if you two busybodies must know. I am inscribing Veilfire runes into your tower to fix ruptures of the Veil. The warding circles increase the stability of the Veil and encourage benevolent spirits to help from the other side. This way the mages of this tower will have an easier time sleeping and working magic again. When I arrived here it was disturbingly fragile. Now will you check yourselves, as any competent mage should be capable of doing, and leave me in peace? I have work yet to do in the lower levels of the tower."

"Well I…" Neria began. "Huh?" escaped the brown haired elf mage named Lysas.  
"If you wish to report my activities to the Templars, do so. I will be with the commander of the Order of the Grey of Ferelden." I posed a bit after that for good measure.  
"I apologize on Neria's behalf. She can be a little hot tempered and insensitive sometimes." Lysas was much more articulate than Neria, I'll give him that. Also I noticed his Aura was sharp but well contained. He was the type to bow out of conflict for the sake of convenience, not the lack of talent.

"What he said." Neria mumbled, looking at her feet. If my memory serves correctly Neria Surana was one of the possible elf mage wardens. Interesting she should survive long enough to be here now.

Absently I nodded. "Don't let it happen again. You should not let your emotions run away with you. Not until you at least know all of the information of the circumstances."  
"Yes mam." She grumbled but accepted my comment. Hesitantly as if in conflict with herself she posed a question.

"What is this Veilfire you talked about?" Lysas looked at Neria with a fond expression.

"If you could indulge us? We are trying to learn, but there are hardly ever new things in this tower to hold our interest."

"Very well. Walk with me then, I still have more glyphs to draw." I mentioned them to follow me.

"Veilfire is the conjured memory of fire. Fire is after all the purest physical form of change. The Veilfire as such, is arcane energy given form and can be used to draw runes and glyphs. Higher proficiency grants you the ability to write texts in Veilfire, which can convey the full memory of your experience. Someone reading it could smell, taste, feel, and even hear what you imagined when writing your text." I kept on walking and lecturing.

Both mages looked like they wanted something to take notes with.

"Fascinating." Lysas breathed out. Both of them had a hungry look on their faces.

"Could we learn it?" Neria asked hopefully. My, my, they were eager.  
I wonder what we must look like to bystanders. 3 elves in a row walking down the corridors like a mother duck and her ducklings. The mental image made me chuckle.  
"Milady…uh… we even forgot to ask your name or even introduce us." Lysas stuttered.

"I am called Sylvanavir and I know your names are Neria and Lysas. We merely skipped the introductions in favor of a lecture. Do not concern yourself. As to your original question. Yes, you can learn it, but it might take a while."  
We approached the last level of the tower.

"Now watch and learn. Open your magic to the surroundings, let your aura feel for my magic and memorize your impressions."

As I spoke I lit the fire in my hand. Burning brightly, it whispered in many voices, tiny little snippets from wispy spirits.

"Now call forth a normal flame you two." Lysas nodded, Neria already had both hands on fire.

"Good. Now extinguish them." I ordered they obeyed.

"The last step is this. Try to re-imagine your hands carrying the fire as it was a moment ago. Feel the heat, hear the crackle, and see the form dancing around your fingers."

As I talked both apprentice mages called forth their Mana. It took a couple of tries for them.

I had enough time to finish the wards. I sent my aura out to check for any spots I may have missed. The mages felt like tiny candles in the dark, bright warm spots in the dark.  
The Templars echoed with an unfitting song. The song of the deep earth sounded from their minds and reinforced reality around them. They were most uncomfortable to focus on. The Veil however was mended.

All was well.

When I opened my eyes Neria and Lysas both had arcane fire in their palms. Not quite the proper Veilfire, but it had a whisper to it and a slightly green tint.

"Well done you two. Lecture complete. Keep practicing. Meditate on it sometime. If you wish to speak some more I will be in the library. I would be happy to share my knowledge with you, such as it."

"See you there." Neria dragged a waving Lysas behind.

What a pair.

They had potential, both of them. I suppose they were contacts worth cultivating.

Theron and his troupe caught up with me as I was walking back up to the library.  
"You were exactly right about the Veil tears." An excited looking Finn mumbled.  
"Yes and your statue was not very helpful because of them." Ground out the grouchy Dalish warrior. Spirits, did this Dalish elf ever cheer up.

"Peace, lethelan. We got what we needed." Ah look at Theron diffusing arguments instead of starting them. He has come so far.

"Care to share?" I grinned at my friend.

"Well our new quest goals are as follows. Collect a shard of the mirror Tamlen and I found in Brecilian. Then we venture to Cadash Thaig, which was apparently once a mixed dwarf and elvhen community called Cal hadagh. There we can find the Lights of Arlathan and use them to boost Finn's scrying ability. And then we can go and find the mirror this will lead us to."

As Theron went on and on with his plans I could feel myself developing a headache.

"I personally do not see the need for the shem mage to join us on this quest. It does not concern him." Ariane threw into the conversation.

"Any bit of magic could just as easily be done by Sylvanavir."

"It shall be fine Ariane. Let Lysas gain some experience outside of the tower. The artifact shall belong and remain in the hands of our people. The same goes for the tome of course."

Switching to address or commander again.

"I will join up with you in Cal Hadagh. I have no desire to return to the forest so soon. This library gives me opportunity to do research. Also I seem to have picked up another two younglings to teach. I will be camping out in the Frostbacks in 2 weeks' time, agreed?"

He regarded me critically for a moment, nodded and rummaged around in his pocket.  
"If someone gives you trouble *cough*Gregoir*cough*Templars* then use this."  
He handed me a badge. It was about the size of my palm and from the shine of it made from Silverite. It showed two gryphons surrounding a sword, the Grey Orders coat of arms.

His regard for my safety made me smile a bit.

" _Thank you my friend. Be safe and good hunting."_

" _Thank you too, elder. I will see you soon._ Come on Ariane, Finn."

Ariane bowed in my direction. Finn waved and with that they left me to my books.


	7. A successful Witch Hunt

A/N: So with christmas coming soon, my workload has increased... sorry to say but i am behind on typing up my story. Next week you will get your two chappies as per usual.

For this week have a nice extra long one to bridge you over.

I am also proud to announce... (drumroll) after this chap we have finally left the game canon of DAO and DLC's behind us.

What will follow? Some sciency nerdy stuff, some world domination planning and setting sails for the City of Chains!

THX btw for the lovely reviews i keep getting, it's nice to be appreciated = D

Presenting: A successful Witch Hunt (in 2D, hope you have your 2D glasses on hand)

The Templars were gracious enough hosts. They gave me guest quarters on the upper floor, even though half the towers beds were in fact empty.

I have always wondered how the mages could get cabin fever in a structure this large but now…

You never really understand how a building can become a prison unless you start living in one. The only time you see the outside is the tiny bit of sky through impossibly high up windows. The Tevinter architecture, while impressive from the outside, was depressive from the inside.

Additionally the Templars are always watching. It is very, very uncomfortable to be stared at by groups of armored up Templars. It is no wonder mages get anxiety issues and try to rebel.

I managed to ignore most of the people around me and focused on the library. Within the time of 3 days I finished 12 books.

Much of the chantry censored stuff was horribly incorrect. As I read, book after book, I developed a sincere hatred for the religious censure going on in here.

Lock everyone up and tell everyone on the outside what a horrible bunch of people live in the tower. It was isolation and subtle brainwashing at its finest. No wonder this system would collapse soon.

The chantry just put all the undesirables in tight places and pretends it's to save the mages from themselves. Their guards are indoctrinated, substance addicts with pointy weapons and bucket helmets that believe they can do no wrong. To top it off, instead of educating the masses, most people are discouraged from learning or researching anything about magic, making it the dangerous unknown.

Humans are really hopeless, this is as bad as my former world's middle age. What these people needed was an age of enlightenment and to stop thinking in black and white.

But I digress, it was not long until Neria and Lysas came to find me once again. Of course these young apprentices would appreciate any new knowledge from the outside world. There is only so much you can learn from books, after all.

I decided to indulge their curiosity and I cannot deny that I gained experience and pleasure from teaching others as well... Anyway… where Theron felt like a younger brother figure to me, both of them seemed more like… children.

They just felt so much younger, as they were sheltered most of their lives. I admit the recent outbreak of demons and abominations may have increased their maturity just a little, but overall they retained their childish naiveté about the world.

After a couple of lectures on magical theory, barriers and Veilfire glyphs I decided to tell them about our research on the Eluvian.

Predictably they were both very excited. Lysas had this starry eyed gaze whenever I talked about elvhen magic or artifacts and Neria was overcome by the possible uses and went into a rant.

It was most amusing to watch.

Sometimes I left them to their devices and took some of my books to my room. There I set a ward on my door and jumped up to one of the high up windowsills to read in peace and with a nice view of the lake outside.

After 10 days in the tower I had my own little class.

The senior mages noticed me giving lectures to the two goofball apprentices. They decided I was good enough to take over some classes, after all they were pretty low on staff.

I cannot blame them either. I got free board, food and books so I guess it was fair of me to pitch in. Neria and Lysas were a bit put out by not being my exclusive students anymore so I let them in on my little big secret.

One of them in any case.

"Listen up you two." I started after I triple warded my room.

"You two have some serious potential, both as people and as mages. And if there is one thing I hate its wasted potential. After all I am friends with Diligence and Ambition."

Oh yes, they knew about my Spirit friends, I introduced them just recently.

"I have really big plans for a lot of people, but I need a few choice agents to help me. You cannot win a game of chess with only a King and Queen you need support." I couldn't help going halfway into lecture mode, it's a thing with me.

"Wait a sec. Are you calling us Pawns?" Lysas said grumpily. Neria pouted and nodded.  
"No Dalen I am more thinking of Bishops in your case, but you are missing two points. Neria, think, what is he missing."  
Neria liked a challenge and she was excellent in logical thinking and strategizing despite her temper.

"You are asking for our support, also you value all the pieces as a whole. Even had you referred to us as Pawns you would still find that extraordinarily helpful." She stated matter-of-factly.

"Well done." I nodded with a smile. 13 days. It took me only 13 days to break them out of chantry and circle indoctrination.

"Okay so you wish for our help." Lysas looked more engaged. "With what?"  
"Now you are asking the right question?" I grinned at him.

"Come on tell us, tell us, tell us." Neria was practically bouncing in her seat.  
"That's the plan." I waited for both of them to calm down a little.

"Hold on to your seats. I am trying to rebuild an independent elvhen nation."

There I said it.

If this was a cartoon their faces would have fallen off and onto the floor.  
"But... but the Exalted March….!" Lysas was close to hyperventilating.  
"Calm down Lysas. If you continue like this you will fall unconscious." He took some deep breaths while Neria started grinning from ear to ear.

Rebellion and Chantry Heresy was right up her alley and forming an independent nation right under everyone's noses was a glorious idea to her.

"It will start out small. A few Dalish clans and City elves to start out a colony. A few eyes and ears in different countries and cities. A school for children and young adults to get a good education. I would need to reactivate the Eluvian network too." I paused here.

"Wow." Neria added profoundly. "That sounds soooo incredible. I am in."  
"Neria! You can't just sign up like that. Think first!" Lysas shouted at her.  
"Lysas! You need to think. A place free of oppression and full of possibility. Think, Lysas, we could have our own home and we could learn or even teach. See the world and experience it with our own eyes. Free." She got a faraway look in her eyes.  
"Outside of the circle, hmhm." He grumbled in thought.

"Ah yes, now that you mention that point. I will get you out of here. First though I will need to pay a visit to the depository in Denerim."  
Lysas looked at me. I met is gaze.

"If you are serious. Really serious, then… I will help you. I expect you to keep to your side of the promise."  
"I will. One word of warning though, it will take some time. This is a plan for the next 10 years. Of course your freedom is planned for the next year. You will need to learn some magic for it as well and be on your best behavior until that critical moment comes."

Silence filled the room, it was almost tangible. I walked slightly away turning my back to them. They were young and slightly over enthusiastic. I could not ask them to commit to such a harebrained idea just like that.

"You know what Lysas is right. Do not commit yet, take your time to really contemplate the issue. Tell me your choice when I next return to this circle."

I made them leave right after that and collapsed on my bed.

Thinking about my plan in a theoretical way made it seem simple and logical. My step by step approach of it made sense. If I said it aloud, it seemed more real. The more people know the more it becomes an actual thing, with expectations and deadlines.

I will have live up to my own proclamations now. No going back.

The next morning it was time for me to leave.

A whole crowd of kids and youngsters were assembled at the exit of the tower to wish me well or ask me to stay.

"I will be back. No tears okay. Keep up the good work, stay studious." I gave all of them stern glances but could not keep it up for long and broke down into a smile. The little ones grow on you after a while.

I turned to Lysas and Neria and gave both of them significant looks.

Lastly I turned to Knight Commander Gregoir and Senior Enchanter Irving.

"Thank you for your hospitability." I gave them a nod in place of a bow.

Outside I took a nice long look at Lake Calenhad.

The sun was just rising and colored the water and the surrounding hills a vibrant orange. Once I reached the shore I gave the tower a last glance and went into the woods. With a leap I let go of my elven form and landed on four paws.

My wolf howled reveling in the regained freedom. The rest of the day I spent running south and west along the coastal glens. At some point in the afternoon I took a break and appreciated the view of the cliffs, houses and the castle of Redcliff village.

It took me the entire evening and sundown to circumvent the town, but I finally managed to reach the Frostback Mountains when the moon was out.

I took only a short nap to rest my body. When the end of the night approached I shook the sleep from my mind and hunted down the scent of my group.

The scent of Grey wardens was very distinct. They still smelled like regular people but they carried the bitter and metallic scent of the Blight with them.

Eventually I found a trace of their scents. From that point forward it was easy to catch up with the squad. I almost ran them over when I jumped over a low ridge right into their camp.

Ariane and Theron both had their weapons out and pointed at me. Finn whimpered having been woken by the sound of drawn swords. I turned back into my elvhen form and raised my eyebrows in a challenging manner.

The three travelers stared up at me blinking sleepily, then Theron started laughing.

Ariane looked startled but caught herself quickly.

"Very impressive, even though I do not appreciate your choice of shape."  
"This does explain certain behavioral quirks of yours, Hahren."

Theron sheathed his daggers. I chuckled.

"Has your trip to Brecilian been successful?" Ariane nodded and Finn waved a mirror shard around.

"Careful with that shem!" Ariane barked out.

"Cadash Thaig is just a few miles north from here. There will be Darkspawn, Blight or no. Get rest, recover your strength and focus. You will need it." Theron announced before he sat back down on his bedroll. I joined their camp and allowed myself a few more hours of rest.

The next day we reached the entrance of the Cave dwelling just before noon.

Underground the air got heavier and the light faded behind us as we walked further inwards. I decided to err on the side of caution and concentrated on my wolf senses.

The smell of dirt, decay and Blight hit me hard. When I adjusted to it I could also make out faint traces of greenery ahead. Small drops fell on stones and into pools filling my ears with the ringing of echoing pitter patters.

"I can smell the Blight ahead, as well as plant life." I mentioned in passing.  
"Ah yes, the ceiling collapsed in some places. The sunlight and the rain helped the vegetation regain some foothold." Theron answered the non-question.

"How did you know?" Ariane got curious.  
"I smelled it." I replied.  
"Is your sense of smell at all related to your shapeshifting form?" she asked.

"Yes, in part. Some characteristics bleed over into my personality. I have a certain amount of Pack mentality, I love the outdoors. I am a relentless hunter and also have a superior sense of smell."

"That sounds amazing. And do you have a fixed form or can you change into anything? How does it work? It is very old magic right?" despite his shy nature Finn came closer to listen in.

"It is old magic, yes, but everyone could learn to do it. Also, one can attain any form as long as you study it enough. There will always be two or three forms that come to you more naturally. They will be more comfortable because they match your temperament or your personality in some way."

"So you are like a wolf in personality. You know about the wolf of Dalish legends, I assume?"  
Ariane asked carefully.

"Ah, yes, the Rebel wolf, Fen'Harel. I believe he is a seriously misunderstood figure of your past. Aside from Dalish prejudices though, yes, I am like a wolf in many ways.  
I am protective of my family and friends and children in general, but I am slow to trust a stranger. I also love my freedom.  
I was taught not only how to become a wolf, but also how to be a wolf. When you do it right, shifting becomes an experience not a simple matter of magic shape change."

Finn was taking notes in a little notebook. Ariane looked ahead and contemplated my words. I walked up ahead to Theron for a while.

"Who taught you if I may ask?" Finn asked me his first direct question. It seems his curiosity finally overcame his meek personality.  
"My mother. She was a forest spirit, which occasionally took the form of a wolf."

"Was?" his question made me remember all I had tried to leave behind, but sadness caught up with me again in that moment. I had my time to grief, but the sadness will likely always stay.

"She passed away. Physically at least. She was a spirit, so in death she returned to her former state and is now part of the forest once more. My mother now is the entire Brecilian forest."  
"I am sorry I…" he stuttered.

"Enough. Let it be." I said in a low voice. He better not push this topic. I will allow myself to get angry if he does.

"We all have our scars. Let's leave them behind us and focus on the task at hand." Theron interjected.

"Understood Commander." I acknowledged. Finn fell silent, reprimanded enough.

As if fate decided to interrupt our moping it threw some Darkspawn at us.

Our group was immediately up in arms the moment we heard the screams. "Shrieks!" Theron shouted.

For the slightest moment my modern mind went into panic mode. This was the actual first time I would go up against a fantasy monster.

Then, the moment my hands went to my shorts words it disappeared. Muscle memory took over and I sliced and diced my way through several of the twisted versions of my former brethren.

I dashed past Theron, giving him the chance to go into long range archer mode. My body met another group of opponents with twirling, piercing and stabbing blades in hand.

During the fight I carefully avoided any splatters of blighted blood.

When all was done my blighters were in tiny pieces, Theron's looked like pincushions and there were smoldering pieces of flesh around Finn and Ariane.  
Without a word Theron reassumed the lead.

"Right this seems to be a good spot to start." Finn announced with fake confidence.  
"Start with what?" Ariane ask.

"Well finding the … uh Lights of Arlathan. I have been going over my old notes and…"  
"It is pronounced Ar'LATH'An, not Ar'lath'AN." I interjected dryly.

"Right how do we find them?" Ariane brought us back on track.  
"Well according to my footnotes they have been warded away from unworthy eyes. My guess is that this was done to protect ancient elven relics from the Tevinters. Only the blood of uh Arlathan would guide the way."

"I am guessing we count as unworthy too huh?" Theron asked.  
"Yes unfortunately." Finn shrugged. "However, since you all are of elven origin we could use some drops of your blood to detect the relic's position." Ariane hissed in consternation.

"Is this anything like bloodmagic?" Theron was cautious.

"No commander. Well not really. It is close enough that I would appreciate not reporting it."

"Fair enough." The commander shrugged in indifference and held out his hand.

"No commander, not yours. I am sorry but it is too tainted." He looked apologetic enough.

"Fine then." Theron looked at me.

With a sigh of resignation I held out a hand.

Finn made a shallow cut on my palm and mumbled what I understood to be a thanks.

I tried to feel the rhythm of his magic, the flow of his spell. It harmonized ever so briefly with ancient ambient magic I had not detected until now. His spell amplified his aura and sent it out across the surrounding area. My blood was used like a blueprint of what the spell should look for. It worked rather like a magical sonar. It was interesting, I will certainly try it out given the chance.

20 meters to our right a pillar of light erupted from the ground and then gathered into a tiny floating sphere.

"There! That will show us the way." Finn was breathing harder from his exertion.

"Good job Finn!" Theron praised and the mageling practically glowed in response.

"Right. Let's follow the floating lights. The book never mentioned those." He muttered almost as an aside to himself.

Once we managed to cross over 2 enormous bridges we found ourselves in a miniature dwarven city. I could appreciate the finer stone carvings surrounding us. I was also not alone in that assessment. Finn started raving over the marvelous masonry and would only stop when Ariane or Theron interrupted him.

The pillars of magical light summoned wisps as guidance for our quest. Being led around by wisps was something I was familiar with. The little light wove through the underground city and we followed as best we could.

The emptiness of the streets was eerie. Theron drew his weapons the moment he spied lit torches. Normally these would not stand out much, but in a deserted city…

"Darkspawn ahead." He murmured to the group. We all got ready for combat.

The first group to ambush us was in fact not comprised of darkspawn, but deepstalkers. These tiny little dinosaur lookalikes started spitting a foul smelling acid at us. With my level of agility the creatures were more annoying than dangerous. Nonetheless I had been trained to focus on every battle, no matter how inconsequential it may be.

Our guiding wisp led us past 2 more darkspawn camps until it finally stopped in a corner between 3 pillars. Finn stumbled forward and redid his sonar spell to illuminate a lamp like structure.  
Before we had any time to properly look at the artifact a guardian spirit appeared and started to attack us.

Urgh! I felt so stupid! I should have seen this coming.

" _Stop, guardian. We mean no harm. We came seeking the guidance of the lights of Arlathan. Be calm."_ I put as much serenity and authority into my voice as I could muster in this surrounding.

Reacting to my words the spirit put his weapon down and stared at me in silent reverie.  
He did not reply whatsoever. He must have been a spirit for too long to retain his individual self. I shuddered at the thought that this could have been me, if Hope had not rescued me.  
I wish I could help them, but I was no pure spirit.

"What did you say to it?" Ariane stared at me incomprehensibly. I had never spoken fluent Elvhen in front of her before. Theron had an impressed look in his eyes. He had learned enough to understand what I had said.

"I did not even understand half of what you said and I studied Elvhen dialects." Finn added self-importantly.

"I am older than I look." I refused to say more on the subject. At least for the moment.  
Quickly I bend down to pick up the lamp and the proceeded to stalk off in the direction of the next waypoint.

Every lamp was the same. I felt sadder each moment I spent with the specters.

My aura picked up on the fragments which were left from their former lives. One of them had enough coherence to greet me and bow in acceptance of my authority.

When we had all 4 lanterns I turned towards the general direction of the city. With a hand over my heart I bowed my head in respect.

" _May you find peace in the beyond, brothers and sisters. You have certainly earned it._ "

Finn was happy to lead us onward. Our next stop would be an open area where he could perform the scrying spell. Thankfully there were a lot of open spaces around.  
He warned us that his next spell will likely tear the Veil in this place. This will be enough for creatures to come through. In preparation we surrounded the mageling in a triangle formation and readied our weapons.

The moment he started his spell Shades appeared. Despite their sluggish movements they are hard to defeat. Creatures of the Fade are relatively resistant to magic and when hit by swords they did not take much physical damage either. These creatures possessed leathery skin that redirected heavy blows. My best option in combat was to pierce their faces through.

They came in waves of 5 to 7, every time Finn's spell picked up another wave of magic from the lamps.  
After 4 waves Ariane was heaving and even Theron breathed a little harder. Touching my companions shoulders I cast a barrier spell on us all. After wave number 6 Finn shouted out in triumph and then keeled over unconscious.

I killed the last Shade which had crept up behind the Dalish warrior.  
"Ma serannas." She slumped to the floor. "Dah'rahn Dalen. You fought well." I got a grateful smile in return.  
"Finn, you okay." Theron asked our whimsy mage. He was already back on his feet. Grey warden stamina at its best.

"Yes, yes I am fine…The mirror, Eluvian, whatever, I found it! It is north east of here. In a dragon graveyard."  
"The Dragon bone wastes. I have been there before. It is full of Tevinter ruins, bones, cultists and Dragonlings." Theron has been everywhere it seems.

"How are we going to get there?" Ariane asked.

"Via Highever?" Finn suggested.

"No. it leads us too far east. However, there was a Grey Warden camp close to the coast. I remember reading a report about its upkeep. Your call commander." Was my input.  
Our fearless leader frowned in thought as he went around and picked up a few of his undamaged arrows.

"You are more familiar with my paperwork than I am these days… I will trust you to lead us safely." He grinned at me.

"Very well. Lead the way out and I will lead the way to camp."

"Deal."

We made our way out at a slow and steady pace.

The path was thankfully quiet. A small mercy I am sure. No Darkspawn and no more Fade spirits assaulted us.  
Daylight was a welcome change to the darkness we had been subjected to recently.  
"From here on out I will be your guide north. Please do not be alarmed by my change. I will be just as intelligent and compassionate as before."  
Then I turned into Witherfang Jr.

"You mean to lead us in this form?" Ariane looked at me with suspicion. Finn started twitching at every movement of mine. I huffed in annoyance.

"Right. Lead on." Theron motioned with his hands and gave a little bow to lighten the mood.  
His unwavering faith in me and my trustworthiness was like a balm for my spirit.

It had been scratched and bruised by the doubts and ignorance and disregard of people all around. A deep breath of fresh mountain air, all crisp with light snow and pine raisin filled my lungs. It calmed me down considerably.

I started out at a light jog and realized even that will be too fast for my traveling companions. So I chose to walk ahead of the group.

Slowly we made our way north through the hills and east onto the roads. Occasionally I scouted ahead and went back to the troupe to reassure them.

We reached the Coastal regions of Ferelden within 2 days. All the rain of the western most Stormcoast made it difficult to pick up any trails, so I changed back to my elvhen form. After a little bit of guess work and walking around, we found the Warden hut. The blue banner greeted us from afar, showing off two proud silver gryphons as it flapped in the wind.

We started camp inside, where we found shelter from the nasty weather.

Theron sat down next to me looking outside the little window flap.

My eyes and nose still felt sensitive.

"You know…" my elvhen friend softly said to me "you seem a lot happier as a wolf."

He sighed and put a hand on my shoulder. If there was one thing I missed it was the way I could freely give and receive hugs when I was still a normal human.

Now I had an image to uphold and I could not trust many people to see my soft and fragile side.

"Been wanting to say that for a while now huh?" I replied weakly and leaned my head on his shoulder. He smiled at me. A warm brotherly smile I had not received often.  
"Being a wolf is easy. It is all instinct and simple pleasures. The feeling of wind in my fur and the warmth of the sun warmed stones underfoot." I explained to him as best as I could.

"There is also the thrill and fun of chasing and hunting. I can stop overthinking things and leave most of my responsibilities behind."  
"It does sound nice. Almost reminds me of my days as a Dalish hunter." The wistfulness in his voice as he remembered a life of simplicity… it tugged on my heartstrings.

"There is a reason it was wolves, who became partners of the Dalish Emerald Knights you know." I nudged his side with my elbow, hoping to lighten the mood if only slightly.

Both of our younger companions were deeply asleep in their bedrolls. Theron and I enjoyed the silent hours of our night watch.  
"This might be our last chance to talk." I raised my eyebrows at that comment.  
"I will leave with Morrigan, when we find her." Now I raised my head from his shoulder. Truly, I figured he would do something like this.  
"You are sure we will find her and confident she will let you join her on her little getaway."

"I am reasonably sure yes. There is one thing I would like you to take over for me…" he shook his head.

"This is about the Keep yes?" He nodded at that and took a deep breath.  
"I hereby rescind the title of Warden Commander until further notice. Please return to Vigils Keep in my stead. There is a letter I would like you to take out of my desk and deliver to the Queen. She is now the de facto leader of the Grey Wardens of Ferelden. The letter is a recommendation and a formal title transfer. Do with it what you wish. Give her my regards too. She was, is and will remain a good friend and a wonderful person to work with. I am sure you will discover this for yourself."

" _You honor me with your regard and trust. I know I never said so out loud and I will not do so again, so listen to me now Theron Mahariel. I respect your deeds. I admire your spirit. I love you like a little brother. I wish you all the best. Should you ever need a home, find me."_

Both of us were misty eyed. We both were people to keep a close check on our emotions and how much we show to the world. It was sometimes hard for us to let go of these tight reigns.

Theron looked a little overwhelmed by my familiarity.

" _I…Sylva…Thanks and … just thanks."_ By the spirits, had I really become this attached to the young man in front of me… I would have to watch myself in the future. To calm us both down I gave him a hug. With his head on my shoulder I could feel his attempts to calm his breathing down. I also noticed when he started chuckling.

" _Before I forget."_ He whispered and sat back to rummage around in his side bag.  
He handed me something small wrapped in a bit of leather.

" _Something to remember me by. I thought it would fit you."_ His smile was soft and gentle and made him look 10 years younger.

My hands fiddled around with the small bundle. Opening it carefully I spied a wooden ring in the center of my palm.

Switching back to common Theron explained to me that it was a Dalish Keeper ring, carved from sylvan wood.

It had belonged to his father, who had been the first to keeper Marethari. His parents match had not been met with approval. One day after a secret meeting they had been ambushed by human bandits. His father had been killed protecting his mother. Just after Theron had been born, his mother had finally given in to her grief and wandered off into the moonlit trees, never to be seen again.

"I know you dislike Dalish superstition, but a Keepers ring is very fitting for you. You are essentially aspiring to become a Keeper of all eleven people and you turn into a wolf, which is incidentally the motive on the ring."

"To keep the Dread wolf away…." I smiled ruefully at the astoundingly detailed wolf carving on the ring.  
"Thank you, Theron. I will look after this treasure of yours and think fondly of you whenever I look at it." I gave him another short hug, before we settled back into our sitting positions, looking at the stars outside.

I would move forward with my plans in the next 4 years. My first step was to build the first elven settlement in the south of Orlais and Ferelden. Meanwhile some of my newly recruited agents would research ways to repair and activate the Eluvian network. It was essential we got the mid-realm back up and working again. It would facilitate our travel, trade, espionage and overall safety. Perhaps I would stumble upon Theron and Morrigan in the crossroads…

My thoughts made me restless and I began braiding my hair back.  
"Go to sleep Sylva, I will take first watch. My mind is racing I won't be getting any sleep anyway."

"Ma nuvinen."

I could live with that. While I could hold out many days without substantial rest, I wanted to get back to the realm of dreams.

Settling onto my flimsy bedroll I turned around till I found a comfortable position and fell asleep.

This time, instead of running through the Fade in wolf form, I looked for traces of Morrigan.

The dragon bone wastes stood out on this side of the Veil. Years of bloodmagic and dragon worshipping done by Tevinter magisters and dragon cults had weakened the Veil. A lot of spirits cluttered the Fade in close proximity to the wastelands. They observed and reenacted the memories of the past.

The witch of the wilds must have hidden her magical signature, for I could not find her.

What I did find however was a place of power, Tevinter in origin.

An interesting performance of older magic had been performed here recently, which led me to conclude that this is the place of the Eluvian. Morrigan had done her homework to unlock the Eluvian. It must have also woken up the Varterral. I must remind myself to warn the group of that particular encounter.

Content with my findings for now I concentrated on a personal memory to reshape the Fade for my purpose. For the rest of the night I walked the grounds of ancient temple gardens.

My mind regained clarity as the sun rose on the horizon. Early morning fog rolled over the crags of the coast. Ariane had been on last watch and had readied some light breakfast. Travelling with two Dalish hunters sure came in handy.  
Excitement was high due to the prospect of finding the mirror/witch/tome.

As we ate Ariane was anxious to get going, Finn seemed slightly groggy and Theron was silent. I suppose now was a good a time as ever to talk about my findings.

"I used last night to scout out the dragon bone wastes in the Fade. The place of power, which holds the Eluvian, has been activated. Morrigan is most likely there waiting for something or someone." I gave Theron a glance.  
"More importantly, the magic which activated the mirror also woke up its guardian, a Varterral."

Ariane choked on her breakfast. Theron watched me pensively waiting for my explanation.

Finn was puzzled.

"Varterral? I believe I read about those…but I thought they were a Dalish tale to ward of human treasure hunters…"

"I can assure you they are quite real, Finn. Keeper Solan told us that they are the immortal guardians of places and items sacred to the elvhen people." Ariane croaked after she had dealt with her choking.

I nodded along with her comment.

"Ariane is correct. Tis said that of all the beasts, the Varterral are not creatures of Ghilanain. They had been an experiment by Dirthamen, who used stone and tree to fashion a sturdy body and bound a guardian spirit to it. Such creatures make for terrifying foes, but there are some tips I can give you for our eventual combat with it."

I made sure that all three were paying close attention to my next words.

"The first thing you need to know is this, a Varterral cannot die. Their bodies can be destroyed, but they will inevitably reform and the spirit will return to it and resume its duty."

"So we need to damage the body enough for the spirit to leave it… and in the time it reforms we can get in and out of the dragon bone ruins?" Theron reiterated.

"Essentially, yes. Keep in mind though, since it is not a natural body, it will not feel pain.

Varterral stand on 5 legs like a stone spider. Their height is on average 2 and a half meters. Despite their mass, they are fast and can climb very well. If pressed it can leap far distances.

Their saliva is sticky and toxic, so do not let it hit you with it. Our advantage is this: they cannot see. They feel their prey through vibrations of the ground and loud noises."

"So a stealth approach would be effective?" Theron asked.

"Yes. In your case I suggest aiming your arrows at the joints or the head. Both the one eye and the open mouth make for good soft targets."

He gave me a serious nod.

"Ariane." I addressed the elf directly. "Look after our mage. Make sure to distract the Varterral during his longer casting phases. If you can get a hit in, aim for the softer underbelly of the creature."

"Fine I will babysit the mage…. Again." She sighed.

"Hey! What about me?" Finn whined.

"The Varterral is relatively magic resistant. Try using Force magic or anything that does Spirit damage. Do you know the Crushing Prison spell? That could work well."

"I do. Got it covered." He stated proudly.

"Other than that the battle plan is fairly simple. Get on high ground, stay away from its spit and keep moving so it cannot focus on you." I concluded my impromptu battle strategy briefing.

"Detailed and to the point, well done captain." Theron grinned at me.

"Thank you kindly, commander."

"Right let's get going." He clapped his hands and grabbed his pack.

Since he had been there before, Theron took the lead.

Soon enough we reached the gloomy, rocky terrain of the dragon bone wastes.

Not ten paces past the first boulder we were received by a violent welcoming committee.

Dragonlings ran to flank us, just as several heavily armored individuals started a frontal assault.

"Cultists! Careful of the horned helmets, those are reavers!"

So expect unnaturally violent behavior, high pain tolerance, beastly stamina and supernatural strength. Got it.

The good thing about the thin Veil in this area? It made my use of Veil shroud infinitely easier.

With just a bit of focus and a long breath I slipped into the half state of being here and there. One part of me was in the waking world, the other in the Fade, giving me the ability to phase through physical objects like a wraith could.

While difficult to pull off, it was also very rewarding in combat.

My mana circulated faster and in combination with the Fadestep spell I was a virtual ghost on the battlefield.

The reavers had the unfortunate experience of having to fight an insubstantial opponent. Their blades passed through me as I whizzed past their group to flank them.

I left a trail of slippery ice behind me, unbalancing the warriors before I slid my blades across their faces, hands and other vulnerable places.

As we made our way through the wastes we efficiently did away with several groups of cultists.

Theron picked off their mages and crossbow users from afar.

Ariane took point and attracted the attention of their melee forces.

Finn provided us with barriers, healing and was generally being helpful.

I used my ghost mode to Fadestep through the enemies and pick them of from behind.

Our team set up worked very well so far.

Before we reached the open area where the Varterral waited for us, we got ambushed by a horde of dragonlings led by a drake.

The tiny fire breathers were easily dispatched, the bigger one was a problem.

By the time they were taller than a horse, their scales were hard enough to protect the creature from arrows.

Thankfully Finn had provided us with an ice enchantment for our weapons.

As I dodged the fiery breath of the lizard I laid down some Ice mine glyphs on the ground.

Theron meanwhile had switched to his dual dagger and lured the angry reptile into my ice traps.

As they detonated in crystalline explosions of cold magic, he jumped onto the back of the drake and buried both of his daggers into its head.

Using his left over momentum he jumped onto a scuttling dragonling and almost got scorched in the process.

While I was impressed by his performance, he should not take such risks.

I glared at him reproachfully as he tried to put out the flames on his sleeves.

"What?" he gave me an innocent look. It did not suit him.

"Once you faced an Archdemon everything else just seems so tiny in comparison."

"True, but a dragon's fire is just as real."

"But less potent." He grinned, idiotic little brother.

"Just try not to suicide before we reach the mirror and your witch, will you?" my eye roll hopefully conveyed to him what I thought of his performance.

"Sure thing."

And on we went. We went slower this time so Ariane could catch her breath and Finn could take his Lyrium potion. I paused when I saw the glowing blue potion.

The idea of drinking titan blood just made me feel queasy. Luckily I did not do any flashy spellcasting and had a ridiculously large mana pool. I could probably avoid drinking one of these potions for a long while.

With Finn's mana restored, he could cast a mass rejuvenate spell and the entire party breathed a sigh of relief.  
"Well done Finn. Now let's go, we are almost at the center of the wastes."

Indeed we were. The closer we got to the central ruins, the more I could feel the ancient magic in the air.  
It was a bit like someone plucked on invisible guitar strings in the air and all I could feel was the vibration on the other end of it. This must be the magic Morrigan had used to reactivate the mirror. I told the others as much.

Theron looked hopeful at the mention of the witch. He was well and truly head over heels in love. Poor sob, I could understand… somewhat. I shall hope Morrigan appreciates him and treats him well… or so help me I will make her miserable.

We made our way over a small outcropping and ended up in a large circular space.

As if posing for a movie shot, the Varterral crouched atop the highest roof. The moon light had risen behind it, illuminating the beasts dramatically.

"I-Is t-t-that…" Finn had a stutter in his voice.

"…the Varterral." Ariane finished for him.

"Get ready." I gave my order and drew my weapons.

I could not overload them, but I pushed as much of my spiritual aura as I could into my blades.

Finn had already thrown a barrier over us and just I time.

The Varterral had leapt of the temple and landed in front of us.

5 legs left 5 decently sized craters in the rocky ground and debris hit us like shrapnel.

"Remember my lecture! Target the weak spots and keep moving around!"

I needed to shout the reminder over the grueling shriek of the angry elvhen construct I front of us.

The way it leaned back and gurgled… I knew it was about to spit poison at us.

"Move!" I shouted as I ran forward. In my mind the strategy was clear: get in close, don't get hit, crack the armor and pierce through the creatures flesh… the application of said strategy might get a little complicated.

The Varterral had reared its head. Bringing its snout forward, a great amount of translucent green sludge hit the ground I had just left.  
The ground sizzled under its corrosive effect.

Out of the corner of my eyes I saw Theron run for high ground and Finn gaining distance and chanting his spell.

I needed to get a hit in before the creature could regain its balance.

My focus was on the battle now. My mind sharpened in the rush of combat. The mana concentrated in my legs as I willed it, making me much faster.

With a little leap I slipped between its front legs and ended up directly beneath the beast.

Using the momentum of my running start I twisted.

Technically this was a rogue technique. I had never tried out the spinning blades move before, I just hoped it would work for dual wielding warriors as well.

My armor and blades were a little too heavy for a complete spinning attack.

However the 5 spinning hits I did manage, hit the Varterral in the softer, less armored belly. And they did a good job of cracking through its armor and into the softer flesh underneath.

Had this been a creature of flesh and blood, it would have been bleeding heavily. As the Varterral was made from mostly enchanted rocks… the damage was less visible.

I had little time to feel victorious as the Varterral decided to rampage around.

It must have felt my attack and decided to get rid of me by trampling me to death, lovely.

At this point in time I had trapped myself right underneath the beast and thus had no choice other than to join a lethal dance with its legs, weaving in and out of range.

The dodging went on for a moment before I found a chance to jump out of the creatures reach.

Finn had either ignored or forgotten my advice about the enemy's magic resistance and showered the thing with elemental projectiles.

They may do very little damage, but they sure as heck were annoying the beast. When it swiveled its head sideways to glance at Finn and Ariane I saw my chance.

With a dash and a leap I fled in Theron's direction to get behind the Varterral.

Theron had gotten to a spot atop of a dragon skeleton and shot arrows at its head. Most of them were useless, some though hit the eye and mouth. The damage done by these few well-placed arrows was substantial.

One shot in particular hit the creature's mouth as it was about to deliver its acid spit once more. The impact of the arrow staggered the Varterral and just in time for Ariane to drag Finn away and out of reach.

I was the only combatant left in the immediate vicinity and became the Varterral's focus once more.

Like a creepy rock spider it scuttled towards me and swung its front paws at me. Not only were all of the beasts appendages heavy, but they also possessed razor sharp edges.

My problem was the creature's inherent magical presence. My favorite Veilshroud was useless against it and I was too lithe to block these attacks.

I was reduced to dodge rolling around, like a bad parody of a DarkSouls boss battle.

One of the swings came too close and left me with no choice but to redirect the attack with my own weapons. The sound of rock claw on steel blade was horribly reminiscent of nails on chalkboard. My right hand sword had a long vertical crack to show for it.

I honestly started to wonder about what my companions were doing! They better be preparing something good… I was running low on stamina.

Just as another one of Theron's projectiles bounced off the armored head plates I felt a stirring of magic.

Finn had finished his casting. His spell snapped into place, holding the Varterral in a crushing prison. Sadly his area of effect spell also caught me in it.

The spell damage was redirected by my barrier, but the force of the spell effect made it hard to move.

The creature gave a harrowing wail. Spirit damage ignored its armor and attacked its magical composition instead. Meanwhile I tried as best I could to keep my barrier up and crawl away from the pressure of Finn's spell. It felt like I had put on 15 stones and was asked to walk through waist high mud.

After 2 meters the effect lessened and I regained some of my speed. Walking hurt and my bones still felt heavier than they should.

While I dispelled the effect on myself I failed to notice the 2 drakes, which had been attracted by the Varterral's cries.

Luckily the commander was on top of things…

He picked off the drakes with well-aimed shots into their eyes. Finn assisted with a cone of ice and in a matter of minutes the unfriendly lizards were no more.

Desperate to finish this fight for good, Ariane ran forward from her position.

As she sprinted towards the Varterral she dodged several swipes of its legs.

Her luck almost run out when one of the razor edges clipped her shoulder.

Despite the obvious pain she was in, she carried on for the last few steps and rammed her great sword into the split in the armor I had created earlier on.

Her sword went in halfway, broke through the back armor of the Varterral and got stuck there.

A violent shudder went through the construct. It gave one last shriek and collapsed in a heap.

Ariane collapsed similarly, most likely from pain rather than exhaustion.  
I quickly went over to offer my help.

Finn came stumbling over as well, giving the collapsed pile of rock a wide berth.

"Ariane! Are you well?"

"Of course she isn't. Do not ask questions to which the answers are obvious." I replied in a clipped tone.

Theron checked on the dead drakes before joining us.

In the meanwhile I put my hand on Ariane's shoulder and suffused her cut shoulder with healing magic.

My healing techniques are mediocre in comparison to professional healers. It will get the job done efficiently in a pinch anyway.

I stopped when her bleeding had stopped and the wound had scabbed over.

"Make yourself useful and bandage her up." I told Finn.

"Yes mam." He squeaked and hurried to get bandages out of his satchel.

"That went surprisingly well." Theron said softly.

"We came warned and prepared. I feel we could have fared far worse, if we had stumbled in here without heed."

He gave a subtle nod.

"We should move on despite our injuries. Ae you alright? I saw the spell hit you."

His bow was furrowed.

Only now did I notice the slight traces of soot on his leather armor.

"I used a dispel to get rid of any lingering effects. Are you well? No burns?"

"No damage done. The armor is enchanted…" he shrugged.

"Very well. Let's collect the two tag-alongs and move on."

"Let's."

I let Theron take the lead once more.

Ariane's shoulder had been bandaged and Finn looked sheepishly at the Dalish warrior.

By the grace of the ancients, please tell me he is not developing a crush on her…

Theron sped up when we reached the inside of the Tevinter dome.

The place was lit up eerily by moonlight falling in from cracks in the ceiling.

As we approached the final destination of our quest the air got heavier.

And then… there it was, right in front of us.

Upon a dais in direct line of our sight, stood a tall, intact Eluvian, glowing purple and buzzing with magic.

In front of the mirror paced a dark haired, worried looking witch.

"The Eluvian… and it's glowing. We should…", but before Finn could finish his thoughts on the matter Ariane stepped in.

She could read the tension in the upcoming reunion and respected her fellow Dalish hunter enough to grant him privacy, despite her dislike for Morrigan.

"I think she is waiting for you." Ariane whispered.

I gave Theron's shoulder a squeeze and pushed him forward slightly.

He would have to talk to his dark haired sweetheart on his own.

They exchanged questions and answers for a while and then it seems they came to a conclusion… Morrigan tested the mirror portal surface.

"Are we not going to join them?" Finn asked in a low voice.

"No. This is between them. We have no business interfering." I answered confident in my foreknowledge.

"Fine by me. It isn't why I came here anyway." Ariane shrugged, but her voice was tense and slightly hostile.

As we looked on the conversation between the commander and the witch came to a conclusion. Theron gave one last look behind.

His eyes met mine and I smiled encouragingly at him.

He let out a deep breath and smiled.

Then both walked through the portal.


	8. Farewells and Greetings-I get a new job

**A/N Still don't like fanfiction formatting...**

 **!IMPORTANT! Okay some notes on this and all following chappies:**

 **While it is incredible what other people write in elvhen with the help of translators and linguistic geniuses I shall not despair over future elvhen dialogue. It shall be depicted in** ** _cursive_** **from this day hence.**

 **I really enjoy the reviews i have been getting recently. It helps if you tell me holes in my story or characters or plot. (Just please be nice about it I am a gentle soul)  
It is definitely my goal to work with you. Please understand though that i won't turn around on massive plot ideas of mine because you do not like it...**

 **On another not this is the longest chapter i ave written so far, consider it my Xmas gift to my followers, reviewers and new readers.**

 **A warning/explanation for the nerdy part of the later parts of this chapter: The theories were stuck in my head. They do make sense, I did my homework. If you do not believe me check out the web and look up blood virus symptoms and treatment possibilities. If you are a huge Thedas nerd you will also get my references to available DA literature.**

 **With that all being said, Enjoy pls!**

"What?! Wait. What are they doing? Where have they gone?" Finn was shouting.

"More importantly: where is the book?" Ariane furrowed her brow and looked around.

"Calm down. Both of you." I shook my head at their odd priorities.

"Both are beyond your reach now. The portal has closed. The mirror is inactive again." I addressed Finn's concerns.

"As for the book…. One would think the witch had a camp here, while she waited, yes?"

Indeed we found a bedroll and a leather backpack not far from the mirror.

The pack held nothing of importance, just a few healing potions and a little spare change.

Next to the pack laid a bundle of cloth.

Peeling away the fabric revealed the book in question.

It was bound in dark green, slightly scaly leather. The tome had been well cared for, judging by the mostly intact pattern on the front cover and the overall neatness of the bound pages.

Holding the book was a little nostalgic. The script was curly and cursive, weaving over the pages. When you stared at it too long it almost seemed to float of the pages.

Ancient Elvhen was hard to speak and harder to read and write, but I had the knowledge of the ancient past stored away in my brain.

It took me a few minutes, but I got used to the letters quickly enough.

As I read through some of the pages I finally understood the value of this book.

The chapters detailed the layers of magic involved in creating a personalized eluvian.

While I lacked the materials to create a new mirror, it would certainly be useful in resetting pass phrases for older ones. Understanding the magic levels of the mirrors could help me in opening closed portals.

"Ariane…" I called the Dalish over.

"That is the tome! You found it!" she was exuberant.

"Now I can return to Keeper Solan with my head held high." She breathed a sigh of relief.

"About that Ariane. You two will need rest before you head out again. I would offer you the hospitality of Vigil's keep once more." I started.

"That is very kind of you." Finn beamed at us.

"Your welcome. Now… as you are resting, would you allow me to borrow this? I should like to make some notes. It is a very interesting read." I tilted my head slightly.

This gesture seemed to be a quirk of my human life I had reacquired.

"You… you can read this." Ariane's eyes widened as she gestured towards the book.

"Why shouldn't she be able to read?" Finn asked confused. I do believe he disliked being left out of the conversation.

"It is in Elvhen. Ancient script. That is why she is shocked. Suffice it to say that yes, I can read it." I reluctantly handed the tome over to the Dalish warrior.

Ariane looked on the verge of an epiphany. I doubt it would take long before she confronted me about my odd knowledge of Elvhen language and culture.

"I will allow it…" she started, "if you provide me with a summarized transcript of the books contents."

I mulled the idea over in my head. I could not really give the Dalish clan detailed knowledge on how to build Eluvian…. However if I gave them a slightly simpler, edited version that should be fine.

"Very well. You will have your transcript. For now let us return to the Warden headquarters. These wastelands are hardly a fitting spot for recuperation and literature reviews."

Both agreed immediately with my assessment.

Before we left this place I traced some Veilfire runes into the ground around the Eluvian.

The wards would protect it from discovery and damage, until I returned for it.

Finn looked at my work curiously, but refrained from questioning. Oddly out of character for him. Maybe exhaustion is finally catching up with him.

We quickly made our way out of the ruin and out of the wastes.

The rest of the night we spend in the same camp we used before. Both Ariane and Finn snoozed off the moment their heads hit their bedrolls.

I kept myself awake reading the first few chapters of the tome.

When the sun rose I stored the book away in Ariane's pack and collected some fruits and nuts for breakfast.

The two sleepyheads were grateful for the small meal and helped pack up camp to quicken our departure.

Aside from a small bandit encounter on the northern road, our trip back was uneventful.

Soon enough the keep came into view. I was the first to admit that the bleak battlements did not create the warmest welcome, but this was a safe base. Behind strong walls such as these it was easier to relax.

I did not expect a welcoming committee, but we did get one in form of a charging, slobber spraying Mabari.  
Admittedly I had totally forgot about the poor dog. We left him here when Theron and I left.

Mabari were very loyal and knowing this particular Mabari, he would have tried to jump in after Theron when he left through the mirror.

I had never been subjected to a Mabari charge and seeing one now, I had no particular wish to relive one.

The giant canine barely had time to break his speed and skidded across the dirt road.

In order to not get run over I sidestepped the sliding dog. Instead the Mabari collided with Finn, who had been walking behind me, poor sod.

He went down in a tangle of limbs and Ariane's face contorted into a mixture of hilarity and pity.

"Barkspawn, good to see you too."

The dog perked up and looked over to me, tail wagging.

Finn groaned in pain and had to be lifted by our Dalish companion.

"I am sorry, but Theron Mahariel is not with us. He is gone."

The change in expression was so stark it made me feel bad…

Barkspawn whined and his ears hung low.

He started scratching the floor with small

"Cheer up boy, please. He is happy where he is. I will go to Denerim soon. Would you like to come with? You could stay with Alistair and Elissa in the palace."

Wraf! And he went back to tail-wagging and happy.

For a dog breed lauded for their smarts he wasn't very bright was he?

"Urgh I hate dogs…" Finn grumbled.

Ariane smiled and dragged him along to the main entrance.

I just shook my head and followed with the Mabari in tow.

As soon as we entered the steward came to greet me.

He had been informed of our arrival, by the gate guards no doubt.

"Captain. Good to see you again. Might I inquire about our guests and the whereabouts of our Warden Commander?" his gravelly voice echoed in the hall.

"The commander took off on a solo mission. I do not know where he is at this moment. You will see him again, but not anytime soon I wager. As for our guests, you remember Ariane of the Dalish?"  
He nodded dutifully.

"With her is Finn, an archivist from the Circle tower. If you would ready some quarters for them while I see to the accumulated administrative work."

"Certainly. Anything else?"

"We will be leaving again in a few days' time. Warden Queen Cousland will have to be informed of the disappearance of her commander. "

"A wise next step. I will make sure our guests are seen to. I shall send a runner up to the office with a warm meal and some cool water."

"Thank you. It will be very much appreciated."

With this I considered our conversation concluded.

I turned to Ariane and Finn.

"Rest, recuperate. I will be in the office should you wish to talk. Good evening to you two."

" _Good night._ " Ariane replied. Finn just nodded with a grimace.

With a smile and a nod I headed off to Mahariel's old office.

The warm wooden furniture and the blue carpet were a welcome sight.

Naturally paperwork had accumulated, but it was nothing unexpected.

Some were forms of approval for new recruits, new trade partners, nobility disputes and lastly an inventory list of both household and military supplies.

Some hours into my work the promised supper arrived and I took a quick break.

By the end of the day I had finished 3 staples of papers, now neatly categorized and stacked according to priority.

My time in the Fade was spend relaxing in my old garden.

The memory of my childhood home was soothing to my spirit and so I woke up relaxed and restored the next morning.

I met Ariane and Finn at breakfast in the hall.

Both looked much better than in the past few days.

A warm bath and a good night's sleep in proper beds had probably done the trick.

"Morning you two. You can relax for the next two days. I will be finishing my work today and can get a look at your book." I nodded at Ariane.

"I will leave for Denerim the day after tomorrow. You are free to come with me or go your own way."

"Thank you. I think I will go and visit my family. There is a lot of things I would also like to research. I might not get back to the circle anytime soon." He grinned mischievously.

"Quite a rebellious streak you have developed Shem." Ariane snorted.

"Quite a sense of humor you have developed Elf." Finn shot back.

These two had developed a very odd type of friendship.

"Ariane what about your plans?" I inquired.

"I will stay until you finished the transcript. Then I will return to my clan. Maybe I shall accompany this accident prone mage for a while before I do that."

"Of course. Well I will leave you to your 2 day holiday and get back to work."

My hands waved a quick goodbye. On my way out I nicked a plate of fruit and cheese.

Just before I could reach the stairs Ariane had caught up to me.

"Hahren… could I talk to you… in private?"

"Come up to the office this afternoon. I will make time for you."

" _Thank you."_ And then she was gone.

Time flew by as I concentrated on my work. My fruit and cheese platter was empty by the time I finished. There was still some time before my meeting with the Dalish female and so I took this moment to check the drawer Theron had mentioned.

It held a few papers, a wax seal and a key ring. Buried under all of the clutter was a sealed parchment envelope addressed to 'My dear friend Elissa'.

This must be the document he wanted me to deliver.

I was not too sure about the contents of this letter. Theron had said this was a recommendation, but I did not know exactly what he would share with his former comrade.

I could read and reseal the letter but….

If he trusted me enough to do his job, I would trust him to not write about my secrets to Elissa Cousland.

Having pondered enough on the matter I took out the ancient tome from my pack.

I could not translate the book page by page. It would simply take too long. Instead I read the book chapter by chapter and created a 4 to 6 page summary of them.

I was one third into my literature review when someone knocked on the door.

"Come in."

In came Ariane. She seemed conflicted judging by her fidgeting hands and frown on her face.

"Afternoon Sylva. Thank you for meeting with me on short notice."

"Come now, no need for this much formality. Please talk to me as if we were still sitting around our campfire."

"As you wish. I shall get straight to the point then. You are not what you appear to be.

You are no flat-ear. You are simply too proud and confident and well educated.

You are also no Dalish. You are not carrying the mark of the people nor do you use our way of speech. I do not believe I have heard you mention any of our creators by name, not even once."

Ariane started pacing back and forth in front of the door, while I just sat and listened patiently.

"You know a lot about the arcane or at least a lot more than anyone I know, including my Keeper. Not to mention, you speak the tongue of the people as if you were born to it…"

"Is there a question or an accusation in your dissection of my person?"  
I tried to keep my tone of voice as polite and neutral as possible. If at all possible I wanted to avoid aggravating her by sounding to sarcastic or condescending.

"Both." She looked me straight in the eyes. "From the way Mahariel was talking with you he must have known… What is your origin? Where are you from? Have you been taught by one of the Ancient elves? Are they around? Why have they not come to us? The Dalish are the only elves trying to regain the knowledge of our ancestors!"

"I have been taught by elves that by now would be ancient. As you so accurately pointed out I am not of any Clan or City. I came to Ferelden from the depths of the Brecilian forest.

As for ancient elves being around… there are some still left who remember the old empire."

Ariane perked up, hope and excitement in her eyes.

"Most of them live secluded in forgotten temples at the farthest corners of human civilization. They do not consider any elf in this day and age their kin. You are calling the humans 'quickling' when in truth you have also been reduced to 'quicklings'. And most of what the Dalish remember is sadly too little and too inaccurate to really call you the keepers of lost lore."

"WHAT! That cannot be true! There is so much… Are you telling me it is all a waste! What my people have suffered?!"

Ariane was angry. Her fists balled and her body shaking from rage she approached my desk.

"And why are you just sitting there as if this does not affect you?!" and with that she smashed her fists down on the table.

My plate and pitcher cluttered to the floor. Water spilled on the carpet.

"I am trying to help. But ask yourself this: How would your clansmen react to this knowledge? That their way of life is but a shadow of the glory they envision Elvhenan to be?

Would they react like you, with rage and dismissal?"

She looked shocked for a moment and I sat up in my chair.

"They would not listen to me like this Ariane. I cannot help them immediately, nobody can. It would also not be good to go back to the way things were. Instead we should forge a new path for all the people."

The angry Dalish across me calmed down as she reflected upon my words and I breathed a sigh of relief.

"So you are ancient then? And you are trying to help, I just did not see it… My apologies."

"No need for the apology, you were right to question. Also, I have memories of the Elvhen Empire, that much is true. I will try to help as many people as possible, starting with the elves." I smiled at her tentatively.

She took a deep breath and nodded.

"How do you plan to gain the ear of our people?"

"I plan on first gaining the trust of several more clans. Velanna suggested I speak at the Arlathvhen… She was certain I would be welcomed there. I am not so sure about my reception at the gathering, but I will try nonetheless."

I shrugged even though it was a concern of mine.

"You can talk to her, Velanna I mean. She would undoubtedly love to reconnect with another Dalish. She could teach you Elvhen. Or at least as much as she has already relearned."

While I was talking I picked up my fallen plate and pitcher.

After a moment of deep thought Ariane spoke again.

"I think I shall go talk to her. Where could I find her?"

"Velanna? She is usually outside, talking to the trees."

Ariane hummed and gave a slight bow before leaving the room.

It was best to leave her to ponder. Maybe her talk with the former First will help clear things up for her.

Despite my rapidly developing headache I returned to the book.

I made good progress but was interrupted once more when Velanna knocked on my door.

Two Dalish in one afternoon… I was getting popular indeed.

"Come on in Velanna. No need to stand in front of the door."

"Thank you, Hahren. How did you know it was me?" she asked curiously.

"I could feel you magical signature. It is very distinctive due to your Keeper magic."

"Ah. I did not know such a thing was possible."

"Perhaps you shall try it out yourself next time. Imagine your magic and spirit as one and spread them out around your body."

Velanna looked astonished and ready to try it out here on the spot.

"Was there something you needed?" I reminded her.

"Ah, yes. I was just finishing up talking to Ariane. You send her to me? She was very put out, you know. You did not even tell her as much as you did Theron or me. I understand your reservations about the Dalish a little bit better now. Still you did well to tell her. I believe it is your duty, no matter the personal discomfort. And I will be there to support you."

She was so bubbly and positive.

"Okay well enough of that. How was your trip? Have you found anything interesting?"

"Oh yes! It is not much mind you. There are several interesting scriptures, all by Tevinter Magisters mind, that feature Eluvian. If you can find some of them you might find something. Also some clans possess ancient artifacts that could prove useful. The Sabrae clan that lived in Ferelden until recently was in posession of one in particular.

The Arulin Holm. It is a magical carving knife, capable of fixing pretty much anything. I believe it has been blessed by a spirit of restoration once upon a time."

"Well done. This could be useful in the future. I myself have come across a working and intact Eluvian. It is in the Dragonbone wastes. We had to battle a Varterral to get to it."

Velanna gasped.

"Really?! How did it look like? What did it move like?" Is she seriously asking about the rocky monstrosity instead of the magical mirror?

Oh Velanna, never change. I chuckled in spite of myself.

"You can find out yourself if you wish. I will be sending you and a band of mercenaries to the Tevinter ruin to pick up the mirror and as much dragon bones as you can transport safely."

"Mercenaries? Well if you are sure. I shall oversee the move of the artifact and the resources safely. You can count on me."

"I had hoped so."

"Out of curiosity… could I have a little sneak peek of the book? Please." She tried her puppy eyes on me.

"Oh fine. Here. Read over it and tell me if it makes sense to you." I handed her the parts of the transcript I had finished so far.

I kept working on the next chapters and Velanna sat quietly on the rug and read my review.

After hours of working in comfortable silence Velanna sighed.

"I think I should take a break, my head is getting to heavy for my neck."

I rubbed my eyes, slightly tired myself.

"Yes you are quite right. Let's call it a night."

I had one more day to finish this tome and give it back to Ariane, but I would gain nothing by overworking myself.

"I shall see you tomorrow then, Captain?"

I nodded and waved her out.

She smiled and left.

After I dragged myself into my room, I collapsed onto my bed and embraced the sweet serenity of sleep.

The next morning came too soon and too bright.

I was just intensely grateful for the fact that my headache had abated.

Back in the office I sat down to finish what I had started. Due to my workaholic behavior I had missed out on breakfast and lunch and so Velanna came into the room and ordered me to take a break and go outside.

She was right of course. I should not have locked myself into a closed, dark room for hours on end.

I took my Quest log journal with me and sat outside under a tree.

I updated my journal with the events of the Witch Hunt and the future meeting with the Queen of Ferelden.

As I sat with my back against the bark, looking at the orange sunset sky, I realized I had done very little to enjoy my life here. I had always found new work to occupy my brain with. Perhaps this was a coping strategy of mine.

I had not only lost my home world once, but twice in a manner of several weeks. And ever since then I had been on the move or working or training.

My body and mind needed rest.

And so I rested, just listening to the wind and feeling the sunrays on my skin.

My thoughts ran free and wild.

When the sun went down it got colder, but I got the opportunity to watch the stars.

I had never consciously tried to map them.

They looked so different to the ones I had grown used to.

No more Orion, no more Dipper or any of the Zodiacs…

Instead I could find some of the figures from the Astrariums.

I fell asleep under the stars that night and dreamed of the many places I had called home over the years.

A guard woke me up in the middle of the night and asked me what I was doing falling asleep in such a strange place.

I apologized for inconveniencing him on his watch and went back inside.

Too refreshed to find sleep again I said on my bed and wrote some notes on the Elvhen language for Velanna to read and learn.

It would give her something to do on her mission and keep her entertained and challenged.

When I was done with my language lectures I sat back and meditated until the sunlight peaked into my window.

My trip to Denerim would not only lead me to the royal office. I had decided to visit the alienage and talk to the family of Tabris as well.

I had no idea what had happened to the City elf origin warden, but I could use people like Shiani and Valendrian. Theirs was a charisma and integrity that could inspire people to work together against greater odds.

If I wanted to get my first little settlement started, it would be with their help.

My plans were set and my preparations complete.

I personally gave the tome and the transcript to Ariane and saw her and Finn off at the gates. Both left with a smile on their face heading east towards Orlais.

Velanna was happy to receive my notes on phonology and expressed her excitement of more lectures to come. She was not happy however when I told her she could not accompany me. She would need to wait for the mercenary company I would send to Vigil's keep to get the mirror.

When everyone had left I gathered my things and left Vigil's keep, this time on horseback and with a barking and jumping Mabari on my side.

Barkspawn was happy to be on the road again and followed me gladly.

We arrived at the capital swiftly and without trouble. Carrying the sigil of the order was a blessing really. I doubt highwaymen would otherwise overlook a lone female elf traveling witch full satchels and good armor.

It might also have something to do with the war bred dog that was accompanying me.

This was the first big city of Thedas I would visit. Amaranthine was marked on the maps, but in truth it was more fields and stables than city.

Denerim was in many aspects the heart of Ferelden. It was were the lands meet would convene. It is the seat of the throne and the birthplace of blessed Andraste, Bride of the Maker.

The closer I got the more I regretted my wolf form. The smell must have been unpleasant for normal people, but for my oversensitive nose it was borderline rancid.

I pitied the poor dog next to me for he too possessed a nose too good for comfort.

Not for the first time I regretted the lack of modern conveniences and comforts…like showers and flush toilets. Outhouses and chamber pots were all good and working, but it is hard to get used to.

It is a wonder how there is not more sickness and plagues with the state of hygiene in most villages. Perhaps it really is the magic of the land and plants and healing draughts that keep the populace alive.

The first thing I saw was the tower of Fort Drakon jutting out of the mass of houses, walls and estates like a dark splinter. The top of it seemed to be permanently seared by the flames of the Archdemon.

It would be a good landmark to use for navigating the streets of Denerim.

The next thing I immediately noticed were the fortified city walls. Both the gate and the masonry looked new, I guess repair work had been a priority after the final battle against the Darkspawn horde.

I was simply waved in along with some traders and farmers.

Once inside I needed a moment to orient myself. Again the reality of the place was much more confusing and filled with side alleys and people.

Not at all like the nice linear maps in the game.

I walked the streets looking for road signs or maps, but could not find many. Barkspawn was walking alongside me, but of course he did not know the way either.

And so we walked and walked aimlessly following the stream of people until we reached the market place.

I suppose I had no other choice but to ask for directions…

The helpful fellow in front of the tavern directed me to the noble quarters when I asked for the Royal offices. Then he looked at me funny when I asked him where I could find the noble quarters.

He gave me directions, but not before he grumbled "Foreigners…"

Well it was better than "knife-ear", which I expected to hear more often now that I was in a city where nobody knew me.

I needed several more pointers before I finally reached the estate, which had become the seat of office for her majesty.

The queen had apparently thought the previous office to far from the palace or maybe it had been destroyed in the battle of Denerim. Whatever the case, she had taken over the Howe estate for the use of the Wardens.

Before I went in I made sure my attire was presentable and my warden sigil was shiny and visible. "Look alive and proud Barspawn we have a date with a queen."

Barkspawn shook himself and puffed his chest in response.

Then we marched in through the front door like we owned the place.

Best way to con someone: pretend all is as it should be and if someone calls you out on your bluff, act outraged like an Orlesian courtier.

My confidence and attire and the Mabari at my side let me walk past most of the guards outside. I was only halted when I reached the entry hall.

When asked about my business here I only replied with "Commander Mahariel send me to deliver a report to Warden Queen Cousland." And held up the letter in question.

This routine got me as far as the seneschal's office.

This one looked well mannered, well dressed and shrewd. Not someone you could easily unbalance with words or trick with wit.

It was fortunate that I had no need to. My business here was true and honest.

"The guards have informed me that you have business with her majesty's office. Is that correct miss…?" he fished for a name.

"Captain Sylva from Vigil's Keep ser, and yes, I have been tasked to deliver a report to her majesty." I straightened up and replied dutifully. While I was good at giving orders I also was reliable in following them.

"And ah, Captain Sylva, would you be so kind, as to simply leave them with me for now. The Queen, you understand is a terribly busy woman and can't possibly be asked to meet with every messenger herself." He instructed ever so politely, but I could not budge on this.

"I understand your reservations." He smiled and nodded, assuming I would give in to his request.

"However I have to deliver this to Elissa Cousland personally. Not only is the report not on paper, but I also have a letter from Theron addressed specifically to, and I quote this: 'my dear friend Elissa'. Also this wonderful companion wishes to return to her side and I promised him I would see to it personally." I gestured at the faithful hound sitting next to the desk.

He seemed slightly shocked at the familiarity of the address.

"So you see I will not be able to just hand everything over to you." I looked him in the eyes and gave what I hoped to be an apologetic smile.

The seneschal sat back down in his massive wooden chair with a deep sigh.

"I understand. Well in that case you will have to submit to a search of your person for any hidden weaponry. Any weapons must be left with me in my office and you will be escorted to her majesty's office by two of her personal guards."

"I can agree to that ser."

And so I detach my two battered swords and the hunting knife from my boot and left them on his table. I stepped away from the desk and looked to one of the few female guards expectantly.

She gave me a slightly quizzical look.

"What do you think I would want one of the men to frisk my entire body? I think not." My voice was dry and Barkspawn growled for good measure.

"Go ahead, Ser Lanley." The seneschal nodded to her.

Belatedly I realized that he had avoided introducing himself, sly fox.

Ser Lanley put down her sword and shield and stepped up to my position.

Efficiently, but still gently she patted down my arms, torso legs and even searched my hair.

When all was done she gave a nod to me and then to the seneschal and I was cleared to go.

"Right then. These two gentlemen will bring you to the office. If you would follow them please. You may collect your belongings from the keeper of the front gates. Have a pleasant day Captain."

And with a flourish of his hand he dismissed us.

I followed as ordered and Barkspawn followed me.

The clanking of the guards' armor was echoing in the empty halls. For some reason that struck me as funny and I had to suppress my giggles.

One of them noticed, I think, and was slightly concerned about my behavior.

To distract myself I started observing the hallway decorations.

The décor was as rustic and homey as the country. Most of the colors were earthy tones, shades of brown and red and ochre. To no surprise dogs, especially Mabari, featured heavily in the theme. They were woven on the tapestries and carved into the wooden furniture and drawn into the paintings. Instead of calming me down it made me smile even more.

"Lots of fans you have here, buddy." I gestured to the nearest item and the Mabari barked in a merry way and had a bounce in his step as he walked down the hall ahead of us.

"He seems to know the way." One of the guards spoke up.

"I wager he can smell his old master up ahead of us. Their sense of smell is keen." I answered the unasked question.

"Well he is correct. We have reached the office." He gestured to the door up ahead.

Well time to meet some royalty.

"Thank you for guiding me here gentlemen, but I shall go in alone surely?"

"Yes, after you have been announced."

The guard gave two unhurried knocks on the heavy door and entered.

"Your majesty a messenger from the Warden headquarters is here to see you with the Commanders report."

"Ah yes." Her voice was deeper than I had imagined it, but it was smooth and rich like a cup of hot chocolate.

I heard the shuffling of paper on stone. Ah the curse of leadership. Whether you do the paper shuffling yourself or let someone else do it for you… damned either way.

"Let them come in. I needed a break anyway."

"Very well milady."

The guard emerged from within and held the door open for me.

I went in after Barkspawn ran ahead of me.

The office was stylish but pragmatic.

Lady Elissa Cousland sat on an ornate chair behind her desk in a dress robe, layered with plate armor elements. Her chestnut brown hair was braided on both sides, which reminded me of a certain princess from the Star Wars series. On her brow sat a delicate circlet inlaid with rubies and decorated with braided gold.

She looked absolutely lovely and still conveyed a sense of authority and control.

Here was a lady who demanded and had earned respect from her people and I did include myself in that category.

I took some steps forward and gave a proper bow from my waist, hand over heart.

"Your majesty, thank you for taking the time to see me." I rose to look into her eyes.

They were steel grey and piercing. I was an unfamiliar face standing before her in the stead of an old friend.

"It was no inconvenience to myself so all is well. Let me welcome you to Denerim Captain Sylva. I know you would probably like to get right down to business. You have a look about you that conveys efficiency and no nonsense."

She gave me a tight smile, which alerted me that the situation was not as relaxed as I had hoped.

"Do explain to me, before you give me your report, how you are introduced to me as Captain of Vigil's keep without my authorization of that title. I am sure it will be fascinating to hear how someone who is not even a Grey warden is wearing our sigil and using our authority."

Her voice had gone positively frigid within two sentences.

Not good. I had no wish to make the Warden Queen my enemy… Why couldn't I have been met with lovable, dorky King Alistair instead? Just my luck.

"My apologies for the misunderstanding. I will of course explain everything to you. It is after all your right as Commander of the Grey." I gave another short bow in appeasement.

"Former Warden Commander, Theon Mahariel, employed me in Vigil's keep as a trainer and overseer of the keep's forces, warden and otherwise. As such it seemed natural to give me a military title to reflect that. As I was acting under Commander Mahariel's authority he granted me the title Captain of the Grey. It was my understanding that he did so to avoid unnecessary jurisdiction arguments."

During my explanation Cousland had started massaging her forehead.

"This is so typical of that elven rogue. Anything to get away from more paperwork. I swear… he has a talent for bending rules just so…"

"Your majesty?"

"Ah, I did not mean to interrupt. Continue please."

She was a little more relaxed, despite her oncoming headache.

"As I was saying. I got Grey warden authority only on his good word. This sigil is actually Theron's. He gave it to me in order to bring it here. After our recent quest to find the whereabouts of Morrigan, he decided to take a longer leave of absence. He asked me to inform you about his departure."

I took of the sigil from my shoulder cape and put it on the desk in between of us.

She picked it up and turned it around to find Theron's name inscribed into its back.

Her nod of acceptance cleared the tension in the room somewhat.

Before I had a chance to continue, Barkspawn loudly complained about being left out.

"Ah, yes how could I have forgotten you?"

The Mabari shook itself and walked up and around the desk.

"Theron left without him and I thought he might be more appreciated here among old comrades and friends."

For the first time since I had entered the room the queen smiled a genuine smile.

"Ah yes our brave war hound. I have missed you. Alistair has too, despite the many dogs we have in our kennels."

She gave him a good rub behind the ears and under his chin and he gave several grateful grumbles.

"I lost my own hound in the battle of Ostagar. This fellow was one of the wounded Mabari, which we cured during our time in camp." Her smile widened as Barkspawn lay down next to her chair and rolled around on the carpet. Really he made himself at home here almost immediately.

"He found us again after the battle and we adopted him as our companion and unofficial troupe mascot. Even though I did not approve of the nonsensical name the boys gave him. Almost everyone in our growing group bonded with him over something…

Thank you for bringing him here."

"It was my pleasure." I smiled at the little story.

"Now that the issue of your odd title has been cleared, how about a proper introduction. My name is Elissa Cousland of Highever, Queen of Ferelden and Warden of the Grey."

Her manner was much more amicable now.

I was massively relieved. This could have ended badly for me.

Impersonation was not a light crime in these times.

"I am Sylvanavir of the Brecilian forest, Captain of Vigil's keep and Shapeshifter. It is good to meet you again."

"Again?" she looked at me quizzically.

"I do not expect you to remember our short meeting. I was the strange woman in the Brecilian ruins. We met when you tried to resolve the Werewolf curse."

"Ah, yes. I do remember. You tried to persuade us to parlay, did you not? So you finally left the ruins?"

"I did. There was nothing left for me there and the Blight had been ended so I sought out new friends. Mahariel came to mind, seeing as he was kin and at least a little familiar to me."

"And so you ended up in Amaranthine… You must have some fascinating stories to tell."

"I do believe that applies to the both of us, your majesty."

"True." We shared a smile.

"Now down to business. Please do report on the state of the keep and please narrate the quest you mentioned. I would like to hear the details of how Mahariel left."

I did as I was ordered.

First I gave her a rundown of the state of the Arling, then I updated her on all the issues of the keep and finally I gave her a full retelling of the Witch Hunt, minus some personal details.

She sat in thought while I stood in silence awaiting her verdict.

"Show me the letter."

I handed her the envelope without delay.

She read it without hurry. Then she read it again for good measure.

Finally she put the document down on the desk, stood and turned around to look outside of the window behind her desk.

"Do you know about the contents of this letter?"

With only her back to me and her silhouette visible I could not gauge her mood at all.

"No, your majesty."

"Let me illuminate you. Theron Mahariel was most certainly very impressed with your work. He urges me to trust you as if you were him. You understand I cannot possibly do that, right? After all I know next to nothing about you."

I found myself nodding along with her words.

She turned around to look at me.

"However I also cannot ignore his words. He gave me a sincere recommendation. Going so far as to praise your martial skills and sharp mind."

Okay now I was slightly embarrassed. What had that dork written about me?

Cousland chuckled.

"I see despite your professional mien, you are not immune to flattery."

Was I blushing? I swear if I was … The next time I would see Theron I would give him a not so friendly hit over the head.

"I find myself at a loss of what to do with you. You know your strengths and limits better than anyone. If I choose to keep you in our employment, what would you do for the Order?"

Not good… I had not anticipated this to become a job interview.

Could Theron not simply have written: 'She is good at training troops, keep her on our payroll, thanks.'

Come on think, use your smarts!

What could I do for her, which would grant me an allowance of money and access to the circle tower?

Training and Shapeshifting would not help.

Research?

But research into what? Magic… not interesting enough.

Perhaps into the Blight? Would she allow that?

Probably, most definitely if I could look into developing a treatment at least…

Maybe if I gave her some theories.

Well here goes nothing…

"I would like to involve myself in some research on your and the orders behalf."

"Research?" She raised her eyebrow in askance.

"Yes. More specifically I wish to test some theories I have on the nature of the Blight and its infectious spread."

Now I had her attention. I could see it in the sparkling of her eyes and the tension in her shoulders.

I only felt slightly bad for manipulating her like this. It would be fine if only I kept to my end of the bargain I was about to strike.

"And what theories would that include? How does this help us?"

"Well… For starters it is easier to fight something you know and understand instead of aiming blindly. Secondly this might help in preventing future Blight damage on the land. And lastly it might help find a cure for the Blight or at least a treatment for its symptoms."

"Before I ask further questions, let me tell you: Research has already been conducted by several scholars, grey wardens and none of them have made any breakthroughs. Also some research has proven to be of …" she paused looking for a fitting term "unsavory and unethical nature."

My guess was, she was referring to the experiments from the crazy person at soldiers keep.

"I know all of this. My theory however has not been tested yet. Also I plan to get some dwarven engineers to construct much finer research instruments. Instruments which have previously been unavailable."

"Theoretically what would you need for this?"

"I would need to keep my right to access the Circle tower library and laboratories. I would need permission to enter Orzammar and visit the Shaperate there. And I would need funds for the instruments and travel expenses."

"You do realize that is a lot to ask for." She was back in her stern persona.

"I know. But I have faith that I will find out some very interesting things… Even if no cure comes from it. The question now is if you believe it is worth it. Do you trust me with this as Theron would have?"

I had put her on the spot. I knew it and felt guilt creeping up my spine.

"Tell me of your theories."

Nerd time…

"I believe the Blight to be a magically enhanced, blood transmitted disease, a viral infection to be precise. Several points led me to this conclusion.

As you know the Blight is transmitted by ingesting or otherwise coming in contact with tainted blood. It also only effects living things. No fluids mean no Blight as you can observe from the Golems, who are essentially rock and magic. The symptoms include loss of blood pressure and pale skin, as well as a blackening of the blood vessels."

I took a deep breath and continued methodically.

"Last but not least the fact it is connected to magic somehow…

We both know the partial immunity of the Grey wardens is achieved by fortifying your bodies with a mixture of darkspawn blood and lyrium. Also from some older warden reports of earlier Blights it seems that the use of Blood magic increased the speed of the taint spread. Aside from those facts, it is logical we are dealing with some kind of super virus. Otherwise there would have been random people with powerful immune systems proving resistant to it by now. "

Elissa Cousland looked a little overwhelmed by my terminology and fast speaking.

Maybe I overdid it a little to prove a point.

In any case she seemed impressed enough with me.

"Very well. That was… I will not even pretend to have understood half of the words you mentioned, but the underlying ideas were clear enough. You are saying it is a treatable disease if we find out what exactly is causing the sickness in our blood?"

"Yes."

She took a deep breath.

"Okay. You are hired."

YES!

"Under certain conditions. Firstly you must not introduce yourself as a warden anymore. I will simply not stand for it. Instead you shall receive written permission from myself to enter both the Circle tower and the Warden Quarters in Denerim and Orzammar."

Acceptable.

"Secondly you will receive a research grant for every half year. I will see every document of payment and keep a close eye on what you ae spending this money on. Understood?"

"Yes, milady."

"Also I expect you to pay travel expenses yourself."

"Very well. It should keep me efficient with my tasks if nothing else."

"Lastly, I expect a full report on every step of your research in neat and understandable handwriting. No overly fancy terms without detailed explanations."

"How frequently would you require these reports?"

"Every 6 months, should your research take this long…"

"Do you wish to finalize this employment in a written contract milady?"

"It seems prudent. I will have my assistant draw up a draft. In the meantime enjoy your quarters here in the estate's guest wing. Use your time tomorrow to visit the city properly, why don't you? I will send for you when the document is finished."

"Thank you for your hospitality. It will save me the trouble of exploring the city late at night to find a place to stay."

The sunlight was by now so low, it barely shone through the window and colored the room orange. The Mabari at her side had fallen asleep during or conversation.

"It is no trouble. I must say this conversation was longer than I had anticipated." She sighed at the sight of the left over paperwork on her desk.

"At least it was well worth it."

"Will that be all?" I asked for a formal dismissal.

"Yes. Ser Liam!"

The guard form before entered the room.

Had he been left standing outside the door this entire time? Poor fellow…

"Yes your majesty. How may I serve?"

"Please see to it that Captain Sylva receives a room in the Guest wing. Make sure someone brings up supper or her as well."

"I will. Please Captain, follow me."

"Until tomorrow, Sylva."

"Until then. Good evening your majesty and thank you again."

She waved me of and turned her gaze to the papers on her desk.

I followed Ser Liam out of the room and back down the corridor.

The guest wind was on the first floor of the opposite building of the estate.

The guard left me at my door with little fanfare.

Just a few minutes after his departure a servant came in with two buckets full of steaming water. She was here to fill the bath tub was my guess…

Politely she informed me that the kitchen would need some time to fix up the supper and asked me to enjoy a hot bath before I could eat.

I did not see why I should spurn the offer. Especially since she went through all the trouble of carrying the heavy and hot water to my room.

Before I could thank her she left me to my privacy.

I hung up my by now very camouflage looking cape and removed my armor.

The leather armor I had pilfered from the Templar had served me well until now. Upon closer inspection I found several signs of disrepair and wear that were unavoidable.

Maybe I could go shopping for new supplies tomorrow? I did have a decent amount of savings accumulated from my work so far.

My tunic, leggings and underwear were left in a pile at the end of my bed.

Perhaps I could also get a few new and more colorful versions of clothing articles while I was shopping. The three sets I had been using up until now were so bland and well overused.

The bath was heavenly despite its simplicity. There was nothing quite like a good hot bath after a long, busy day.

I let the events of the day pass my mind once more and found myself strangely content with the outcomes. There had been times where I had no idea where this would lead me, but it seemed to have worked out well so far.

When the dinner arrived, I sat down on my bed in a freshly provided night gown and allowed my mind to wander and plan the shopping for tomorrow.

I was slightly excited to finally be able to spend some coin on myself. I was still a female, despite all of the serious business and the fighting and the elfishness I had picked up.

With a sigh and a smile I allowed myself to drift off into a deep dreamless sleep.


	9. A day of relaxation, or is it?

**A/N**

 **Soo you might have noticed the lack of chappies recently…**

 **Well SURPRISE it was New Year's Eve and everyone deserves a day of, I myself was on sick for a week and then went back to work…which reminds me:  
Happy New Year cupcakes! We changed the numbers again… (Don't understand why everyone is always so excited about it?)**

 **Anyhow, still working on typing up more, with any luck you shall receive a few bonus chapters in the next week to make up for the last time I did not update… (I promise nothing, I am as prone to fits of unproductive laziness and procrastination as anyone else ^^). But I am on holiday right now so chances are good.**

 **Welcome back my lovely followers and warm welcome new followers!  
Also thx for the criticism (I mean it, no sarcasm here) it made me expand my story into interesting territory… nobody likes a fantasy story without some good pitfalls and super nasty villains… this ain't slice of life after all. If you want a nice long story to read while waiting for my updates go check out "Dislocated souls" on AO3. It is amazing and addictive and inspirational, just saying. (Inspired me loads!)**

 **Now I have babbled enough!**

 **On with the story…**

I awoke smiling and warm, surrounded by fluffy white covers and pillows. No darkspawn infested nightmares had disrupted my nights rest.  
My eyes opened slowly. The sun was shining in my face, only slightly held back by the orange curtains of the window.

Today would be a good day. I could feel it in my bones, which popped when I lazily stretched after shuffling out of my cozy covers.

With a look on my pile of worn out clothes I was reminded that today was reserved for shopping and touring the city…

I amend my earlier statement: Today was going to be a very, very good day!

I somehow fitted myself back into my torn garments and checked my inventory.

Honestly I sometimes whished this would work like a videogame.

A screen and detailed lists are so much easier to keep track of… maybe I could create a spell for this, but then wasting magic on something this menial?

However if I wanted magic back for everyday life, why not?

I would look into it eventually and not waste my perfectly good morning on it though.

With a surprisingly happy spring in my step I wandered down the corridor until I almost ran into a maid servant.

The poor thing started apologizing profoundly and bowed several times until I could convince her it was my fault and yes, no harm done and no, I would not tell anyone.

Then I asked her where I might get some breakfast from and she insisted on guiding me to the guest dining hall personally.

In the short trip that followed I found out that her name was Tifa, she liked the color orange and was afraid of all the big dogs, but really, really liked working here.

Chatty little lady she was.

She bowed again when we reached our destination and wished me a good day.

Despite my rugged apparel she had called me lady… it felt odd and a bit undeserved at the moment.

I surveyed the dining hall and made note of all the exits and entrances and corners of the place… then I stopped my way of thinking.

Only simple thoughts were allowed today. No conspiring, no planning, no fighting or stealthing…

I sat down on one of the tables and was asked by one of the kitchen runners what I would like for breaking my fast.

Of all the food available I chose breakfast porridge with honey and fruits.

I liked sweet foods in the morning.

I ate in comfortable silence. Not many people were up yet. Until now I had not noticed how empty the hall still was despite the myriad of people who must be working in the estate. Somehow I had woken up just after sunrise once again…

It would be unsurprising if this became a new habit.

When I was done I thanked the staff, for which I got some shy blushes and some odd looks.

I was ready to head out.

Unfortunately I would not be able to go on a wild shopping spree.

Most of my money was kept in Vigil's keep in the form of promissory notes. I only had a limited supply of coins on me at the moment.

It was still a lot of money compared to what your average everyday Denerim citizen would have in his pockets. Still I would have to compromise and not go to over the top with prices.

At first I thought to ask for a map or directions, but then I thought better of it and just left the estate.  
Why not use my trip around Denerim to familiarize myself with the layout?  
I could always use the sea side and the main gate and the spire of Fort Drakon as my points of reference for triangulation.

Denerim was a very bustling city. Despite the early hours people went to and fro. Most of them were busy doing their chores I imagined. You could spy runners with messages or supplies. Inside lit up workshops I could observe carpenters and bakers and shopkeepers start to ready their wares for the day. In the back streets, where the smell got infinitely worse, I could spy washing women, candle makers, soap crafters and many more undesirable professions.

All of them did vital work and I stored all of what I saw in my brain for later scrutiny and study. After all I had never seen these kind of things.

In the ancient memories everything seemed to involve some form of magic, also a noble just did not care enough for menial tasks…

In my old life I had never wondered enough how modern day conveniences had developed over the ages. I sure appreciated flush toilets and liquid soap, but did I know where they came from… not really.

I felt like a child in a fun fair. It must have been weird to observe me. A grown woman totally freaking out over the fact she just learned how to make soap from scratch…

Anyway, I quickly noticed that the lower districts of the city (also browner districts) were much busier and in my opinion more interesting than the upper class districts.

By mistake I had wandered to close to an important and unfriendly looking grey fortress lookalike and had been greeted by stern faces in polished Templar armor.

The place had made me feel itchy and tingly. Either they stored a lot of Lyrium in their or they had spilled a lot of blood in there. I really did not want to stick around to find out.

Needless to say I had promptly turned on my heel and decided not to walk near it again.

The rest of the noble district was mostly empty, if you did not count all the stable boys and maids scurrying about.

It must have been too early for the lords and ladies to show their faces yet.

In other words this grey, stone cobbled part of Denerim was utterly boring me.  
The next area I walked into greeted me with a gang of thugs armed with bows and shivs.

I almost felt bad for them. I really must look like easy prey, but then they must also be pretty desperate, because I did not even look remotely worth the effort.

Or perhaps they were trying to sell me? That would make more sense. It also made my beating them up feel much better.

After I had soundly knocked the wind and wits out of the first 4 idiots to have jumped me, the rest seemed to wise up. They stuttered something about not wanting trouble and were about to run. I shouted at them to pick up their unconscious comrades and maybe think on their life choices. Not necessarily in a nice tone either.

Once they were out of my way I noticed that the air had gained a slightly salty taste and smelled of seaweed and fish.

I had reached the Port district, no wonder there were thugs around.

There was no better way for city criminals to make a living than to barter, rob or deal with newcomers and traders. Occasionally a pirate ship would hire some of them or they could join a mercenary company. Around these parts were the seedier establishments of the city.

The density of brothels, bars and black markets was higher in port districts of any city.

This place was a maze of narrow alleys and dead ends. They called this part of Denerim the 'labyrinth', very fitting in my opinion.

It took me a while to find my way, but I finally reached the harbor. Many ships lay moored here. Big ships with colorful coat of arms and also smaller sleeker designed models, which were beautiful despite their simplicity.  
Out of the way of the greater ships, in a separate basin, I could make out the bobbing shapes of fishing boats.

With no small amount of glee I used a short burst of magic to sprint up to one of the port authority buildings and got to the roof in 3 jumps.  
Careful not to slip of the tiles on the roof I grabbed onto the wind vane and scanned the horizon.

The weather was perfect. Blue skies, fluffy clouds, moderate wind. It was a good day to be a sailor. The water was shining blue and the horizon stretched endlessly.

I took a deep breath of sea air. The salt in my nose and on my tongue and the wind in my face and hair made me feel adventurous.  
I wondered what laid beyond this ocean. What was beyond Thedas? What more wonders did this world hold?  
However I reminded me I had not even fully explored this part of the world…

Also I gave myself a job and I would not quit.

I carefully made my way down to the ground again, startling two workers unloading crates nearby. Before anyone could ask questions about what I was doing on the roof I made my way back towards the market district.  
My exploration had taken the better part of the morning and it was now noon. The perfect time to get some lunch and do some shopping.

I decided to have lunch on the go today as I viewed all the stalls on the market. Many had treats to sell, from sweet smelling blackberry tarts to cheese baked bread and finally meat on skewers. As I meandered from table to table looking over trinkets, shawls, perfumes, decorative daggers and any other trinket one could deign to think of I bought small bites to eat here and there.

All my wandering about was fun but did not help me find new clothes… Finally I saw a proper shop with a yarn and needle sign outside the door. As good an indication of clothes as any right?  
Turns out I was only half right. The place did indeed sell clothes but only custom made stuff I would have to get fitted for. I had no time to wait for them to finish my clothes as I would leave tomorrow… however since I was here and I would come back to Denerim I decided to let the rosy cheeked shop owner take my measurements and add me to the books.

After discussing possible orders with her for 10 minutes I got a recommendation and a way description to a store that sold durable clothes for reasonable prices.  
I ran down a few corners further into the industrial district and ended up in front of a store labeled 'Apparent Apparel' … no comment on the naming sense of these people.

Inside I was welcomed by a jovial young man, the store clerk no doubt. I am sure he was glad to see a customer, as the store seemed to have seen busier days.

After I outlined what I was looking for he escorted me into the corner that held tunics and leggings made from durable materials, mostly cured and hardened leather.  
I would need to find something that was my size but I had honestly no idea how the sizes worked in this country.  
My problem was solved when the clerk glanced at me and gave me estimates of my size. He muttered something about possibly making adjustments for my slim elven form and not to worry about it.

So I shrugged and browsed the wares laid out on the dresser. Most of them were the same shade of brown so it really was not a fashion choice. I tried a few on and went with two dark brown almost black leggings of soft leather. Both felt good when I wore them and allowed for a lot of movement.

As for tops… I got a white blouse with simple lace collar and sleeves, as well as two long tunics that went all the way to my knees. One was in deep forest green the other had a nice burgundy color. They looked nice and would fit under any set of light or medium armor I chose to wear.  
The clerk took them from me to adjust the fit as they were a little loose around the chest area… it got me a little depressed and made me miss my human body just a little.

I was about to pay and leave, giving the store one last look over, when I remembered I would need some new underwear as well.

I did not see any in the store so I politely asked the clerk if he knew of any establishments that sold what I needed.  
He simply smiled and told me to follow him.  
Apparently it was unsightly to display such things in the public store room, so these types of clothes were kept in a side room.

Instead of embarrassing both of us he called a female assistant from one of the back rooms to help me with my selection. Goodness all the extra trouble. It was not like I was going to go for any frilly, lacy Orlesian designs or anything. I needed functional wear right now and I told my assistance so.  
She nodded and got me a selection ready. A pack of 4 complete sets in a bundle and with some soap for washing it out, she explained.

I politely thanked her and made my way back into the main room.

I put the bundle onto the pile of leggings at the counter. The lovely lady assistant told me to wait here a while longer until my adjustments were finished. It would not take long. Maybe I could browse a little more?

A sound sales strategy. And it worked on me, because I spied an interesting cloak in the section of mantles.

It was thick and heavy and dark blue, made from fleece if I had to guess.  
It had no hood, but a high collar with two blackened silver buttons for decoration.  
The cloak split at the front in a symmetric way and revealed the presence of a front cover and sleeves underneath.  
It looked like a jacket – cloak hybrid and I wanted it!

Without hesitation I put it on my pile and then leaned against the counter to patiently wait for the clerk to return.  
Just a few moments later the jovial man returned with my fixed tunics and his smile widened when he saw my grown pile of purchases.  
He complimented me on my fine choice and rang me up. Then we haggled over the total price. I never had to do that in my old life, but I knew you never agreed on the first price unless you had money to throw around.

We agreed and both of us walked away from our transaction with a smile on our face.

Now lighter of purse, but with a bundle of clothes I stood back in the market street.  
My old tiny satchel would not hold so many items anymore. So my next purchase was obviously going to be a proper backpack.  
For a bit I wandered around aimlessly.

Among the stall owners I could hear an Antivan accent cry out advertisement for body ornaments, which sounded very intriguing. I decided to check it out.

The stall was not so much a store as it was a table filled with rings, earrings and bangles, as well as vials and pots of powders, which I assumed were the Theodesian version of make-up.  
The store owner and his assistant wasted no time and flirted shamelessly with any female coming close to their establishment. Many young lasses would come closer just to have a shy look and receive a compliment or two.

I had honestly thought it might have been just Zevran's style to be overly flirty, but maybe it was simply Antivan lifestyle. Even Josephine had a way with honey tongued words.

A look on the feather earrings reminded me of my own and I lovingly stroked my fingers over the fang in my right ear.

The assistant noticed my movement out of the corner of his eyes and immediately sprung to my side. Flirting with the ladies was all well and good, but potential customers were better.

"Ah senorita, I can see from your lovely smile and your artful ornament, that you are appreciative of our selection. And what better to adorn such lovely ivory skin with than our fine and foreign wares, no?" He made a grand gesture to the more exotic looking pieces of jewelry. I almost laughed at his over the top grand standing.

As it was my almost laughter was frozen as a wider than normal smile and he picked up on that. "Look at those lush lips! Perhaps you would also like to try out some of our tinctures and add a little color to your life?! Perhaps a turquoise shine to bring out your gem like eyes. No? Then maybe a gold dust to make your face shine in the sun like an elven goddess from before out time."

This was getting ridiculous! I laughed. Hard and loud and I could not stop. The flattery was just too much. I had tears in my eyes when I tried to calm down.

Instead of looking defeated, the young man looked triumphant.  
"I knew I could coax a laugh out of you yet senorita. It is so rewarding to hear the symphony of bird like trills and bell like chimes as these lovely ladies before me laugh." He bowed as though he had just finished a performance and was indeed rewarded with the giggling and chuckling of most young girls and elderly ladies around.

"Now though, do tell me what caught your eye senorita. Was it our wondrous selection? Or perhaps someone else caught your eye, yes?" he gave me a smoldering look and I almost burst out into laughter again.

"Do not flatter yourself overly much, senor." Two could play that game.

"I was merely reminded of my own 'artful ornament' and started reminiscing. But perhaps you could help me out. I was gifted a ring from one of my dearest friends and I had thought to make it into a hoop earring. Would you be able to do this or are you simply here to sell items?" I cocked my head to the side in a flirty challenge, while showing of the fang earring at the same time.

"Ah, uno momento por favor, senorita." He smiled charmingly and went over to the other, slightly older gentlemen. After a quick whisper of conversation the elder one nodded and came over while the charmer went back to entertaining the crowd.  
"You wish for us to make an earring is that correct." His voice was deeper, richer and had just the slightest hint of an accent left.

"Yes. I have a sylvan wood ring in my possession, which I would like to make into an earpiece." I explained and he nodded along.

"The wood itself will not stay in your ear. You know that right? Good then we will have to take your ring and attach it to a smaller metal hoop, which we can pierce into your ear."

"Sounds simple enough. Could I choose the metal or…"

"We typically work in gold or silver. With your hair color and complexion, gold would look better. We would charge you for the gold piece and a little bit for the piercing itself if you wish to get it done right now."

"Yes, please." I had already taken out my coin purse.

"Come on in then." He gestured to a small booth behind the table of wares, which held a few chairs and had a curtain. Probably to stave of overly curious onlookers and to give customers a little bit of privacy.  
He settled me down on a cushioned chair and got a candle and a needle out.  
"You have the ring on you I assume." He made a gesture to receive something in his hand. Reluctantly I took off the leather cord from around my neck and got the ring from beneath my tunic. Once I handed it over he unfastened the knot and took a look at the ring.

"Dalish craftsmanship is it not? We do not get many Dalish clans in Antiva, but the few that trade with us have wood and leather craftsmanship that is second to none." He praised and I could feel his sincerity.  
"Thank you for saying so and yes, it is indeed of Dalish origin. My friend gave it to me as a fare well gift, he was a Dalish hunter."  
He smiled and started to work, fiddling a golden hoop through the ring and twisting it shut. He could obviously not weld a tiny gold hoop shut so he instead had taken double the length of gold wire and had twisted it close so that it looked like tiny golden vines held the ring in my ear. He was obviously very skilled.

"There we go. You like it?" I nodded smiling.  
"Good. Now this might hurt a little, but you should be familiar with the procedure. That other hook you have there is much bigger than this new earpiece here."

He took the needle and held it over the flames for a bit. I remembered doing this in high school. Only then we also had some ice and a piece of apple to numb the ear and not pierce into our fingers… While he was busy looking at the needle I held onto my left earlobe with my hand and channeled a cold charm into it.

Maybe I did it a little too well, because I could not feel anything on the left side of my face. It was freezing.  
Meanwhile the needle was done.  
"Now hold still please and turn your face up and right." He positioned the needle above my earlobe. He must have noticed the cold, but chose not to say anything. Instead he brought the needle down with a precise and quick jab.  
The heat of the needle cauterized the open wound immediately. He twirled the needle around a bit to make sure it did not get stuck and to widen the hole a little bit.  
Just as quick as he jabbed the needle he took it back out and had my hoop in before I could properly register it.

"Keep it in and don't take it out for the next month or so. Make sure you wash your ear with clean warm water so it does not get the chance to get infected, you hear."  
"Yes, I will and thank you." I touched the wooden ring, which now dangled next to my left cheek.  
"How much do I owe you?"  
He named a price and I found it fair, considering the gold value and the expert work.  
After I paid he smiled and escorted me back out to the front of the market stall.

In fare well he took my hand and gave it a kiss, while his assistant winked and yelled at me not to be a stranger.

Both gestures put a renewed smile on my face. Antivan merchants were funny and flirty whackos. I could not help but like them.  
With my new earring in place it was time to focus on my next target. A backpack.  
Backpacks were mostly made from leather so I guess I needed to find a leather crafter or workshop.

Scanning the market for anything remotely similar I felt my hopes die down until I spotted a stall displaying handbags.  
So purses were a thing in Thedas too, huh? When I made my way through the crowd I got a better glimpse of the wares on display. All of them were made of multi colored leather and had intricate and simple designs on them, some even with color. Most of them were too small for my purpose however.

This stall was likely connected to a workshop in one of the back streets. It would not hurt to ask if they did custom work or if they had more goods inside the store.  
I waited until the owner of this little market stall had finished selling two little bags to a lady with greying hair. When he turned to me his face scrunched up a bit and settled in a slightly patronizing glance.  
Politely I inquired about bigger backpacks of the same quality as these fine purses.  
The compliments helped as he was happy to point out the workshop at the corner, where the wares came from. I thanked the man and hurried over to the other side of the street.

The smell that assaulted my nose inside the workshop was atrocious.  
This was not a tannery, but it was almost as bad.  
Leather wares were everywhere, most of them hung from metal hooks on the ceiling. In the back of the shop, on a slightly raised platform was a well-lit table filled with tools and gadgets. A wizened man with an impressively cropped beard sat hunched over his new creation.

I coughed. Then I coughed loudly. Did it twice, then finally got his attention.

He looked at me and gave a gruff greeting calling me lassy... He reminded me of a 55 year old version of Blackwall with a smoker's voice… The situation was somewhere between intimidating and hilarious. I really could not decide.

I described the kind of backpack I wanted. When I went hiking my dad and I used to have these really lightweight backpacks with extra straps to distribute the weight of your pack more evenly and not slow you down too much.

Of course I did not expect this craftsman to build me a North Face Tracking Backpack from scratch, but extra straps and tiny compartments would be useful.

As I described the details he kept nodding along and took down notes. Then he got up and left me behind… This person had a single minded focus on his work, it seemed. It showed in the detail and quality of his craft.

If you love what you do you will do it well.

He returned shortly with a half-finished leather backpack. The leather shone in the lamp light, showing off a nice chestnut brown color.  
I was asked to stand still as he tried it on my back. He made marks on the leather straps here and there, added new pieces, took some of and told me to come back in the late afternoon. My pack would be finished then.  
That was all he said before he went back to his work bench.

Denerim was full of colorful people, I thought smiling to myself.

As I shuffled out of the store I felt my mood shift. I had done enough window shopping to satisfy my curiosity and had bought almost everything I needed.  
My hopes were that I could attain some drakeskin armor and dragonbone daggers from Wade when Velanna came back from the dragonbone wastes.

For her to return safely with the mirror and the materials she would need reliable help and I could not use the wardens.

This evening I would return to the harbor and look for a reliable company of mercenaries to help out. Before that I needed to get some potions, check on the royal offices and sign my contract and finally get my new backpack.

For a relaxing day it was way too busy. I sighed, this place is turning me into a workaholic.

Before I would have to get back to my errand running I wanted to do at least one purely touristy sightseeing trip.

It took me exactly 2 minutes to come up with a good idea.  
Denerim is said to be the birthplace of Andraste, so they must have a nice chantry building to commemorate that right? I went to the closest chantry and approached one of the sisters standing close to the chantry board.  
My face was showing a pleasant smile, but my mind kept repeating 'please don't be a chanter' 'please don't be a chanter' 'please don't be a chanter'….  
I did not see the point in speaking only in quotes….  
Adorable, badass yellow robot cars could get away with it in movies, but in real life… it felt forced and annoyed me.

I was in luck. The elder lady was in fact talking to me normally and was very pleased to see another soul turn towards the makers light. I did not correct her. She gave me very detailed directions to the chantry in the noble's district and gave me a cheerful wave as goodbye.

Humming familiar melodies, I trudged along with my bundle of items.  
As I was passing a familiar looking inn I remembered about my need for potions and decided to put video game accuracy to the test.

If Dragon Age games were indeed correct then I would find the magical store 'The wonders of Thedas' in that side alley.  
And lo' there it was. One dirty, barrel filled street later I stood in front of the arcane curio shop.

It had carried staves, figurines, recipes and other magical knick-knacks. As I entered I became aware of the many magical signatures of the gathered items. Some of these magical auras clashed horribly, it was in fact as if sitting in a room with 20 music students playing different songs. Some harmonized others… did not.

It was no wonder only a tranquil could work in this store for any length of time. They were for the most part deaf to the song of magic.  
The clerk behind the counter gave me a polite, possibly trained, smile and a nod.  
I tried to cut my visit here as short as possible. I had not yet mastered my aura sensitivity. Too much awareness and I would expose myself to any type of magical fluctuation and influence. On the other hand too little awareness left me feeling blind to my surroundings. It would be as if I stopped using my sense of smell or as if I turned deaf or blind.

I would need to find the right balance. A problem for another time.

I hurriedly made my purchase: a batch of poultices and some healing salves, a rock armor potion and several antidotes. I had no desire for Lyrium potions.

The clerk accepted my payment and I stored away most of my new supplies in my half empty side satchel.

If this was a video game I would now consider myself on my carry capacity limit…

I left the shop on fleet feet and decided to store all my new belongings in my temporary room, before heading off to the chantry.

Really it was on the way anyways.

The gate guards greeted me politely as I walked over the cobble stones towards the entrance of the royal offices.  
On my way in, a servant caught me and told me to seek out the seneschal's office when I had the time. I nodded affirmative and kept moving.

The room was as I left it. Clean and with the sheets in slight disarray.  
I dropped my bundle of new clothes onto my bed and spread the old and new healing items out on the night stand.

A change in wardrobe was in order. I took my armor off and peeled myself out of the old clothes. Now in my underclothes I approached the washing room. As I had hoped one of the basins was still filled with water. A quick heating charm later and it was ready to be used.

I could not believe how much dirt I had accumulated over such a short time span. I scrubbed myself clean vigorously.  
Oh how I would love a good quick shower right about now… but my min bath would have to suffice.

When I felt sufficiently cleaned up I put on one of my new dark brown leggings and the dark green tunic. For appearances sake I took a look in the vanity mirror. The dark green really complemented my honey blond hair and blue-green eyes.  
Until now I had not really taken the time to look into any mirrors… The changes were not overly noticeable. My hair had gained a slightly more red sheen and my eyes turned slightly green. I was the perfect combination of a blue eyed blonde and a green eyed red-head… I just felt glad that my freckles had not followed me into this life.

Come to think of it … which of the two of me had had freckles….?

When looking for an answer I came up disturbingly short.  
Had my memories been compromised? I knew I had gained many new memories during the merge, but had I also lost some?!

A sudden sense of fear and loss crept up within me and I shakily sat down on my bed.

My hands shook in my lap.

Desperately I tried to conjure up images of my old home, my garden, my mum and dad… they came when I needed them and I breathed a sigh of relief.

Then I tried for more difficult images, old classrooms, vacation spots, pages of books… the images were there but a bit unclear. Understandable. They would have been shaky even had I remained myself.

Yet still I could not help but feel like something was missing.  
The feeling gave me a headache and I groaned as I let myself fall headfirst onto my pillows.

So much for… it's going to be a great day…  
Shouldn't have jinxed it.

I took a moment to even out my breathing and regain my warmth and my poise.

Right I had some things still on my to-do list.

Carefully I stood and put the armor back on and marveled at the fact, that this had become second nature to me in such a short amount of time.  
I braided my hair back, grabbed and reattach my now empty satchel and left the room.

The door behind me closed with a click and I strode on down the corridor towards the office area.

I will not lie to myself and say I knew where I was going. I got lost only twice and finally, with the help of a thoroughly amused guard, found the damned door.  
To stay polite I gave three sharp knocks before I entered.

He asked for me after all.

The seneschal looked up from his desk.

"Ah yes, Captain… I had hoped you would get the message sooner, but no matter."  
He rummaged through the contents of his drawer.

"Here it is. Her royal highness has asked me to draw up this contract, as you will be working for the crown for the foreseeable future. I included all the points milady has given me. Please take your time to go over it carefully and read all the contents. Should anything be amiss let me know, but should it be to your satisfaction please do return it with your signature."

"Would you mind if I stayed in your office for the duration of my inspection? I would rather not lose or compromise this document. Better it remained in your office and in capable hands." I gestured at the parchment and his drawer appropriately.

He took the comment as the compliment it was supposed to be and smiled, if only slightly.

"By all means, please sit." He gestured to an unused armchair next to a small bookshelf.  
I took him up on his offer and made myself comfortable.

The seneschal returned to his work and the room was once again filled with the scratching sound of quill on paper and the occasional clink when the metal nib made contact with the ink container.

I tried to concentrate on the legal document before me… and almost gave up.  
While the handwriting was neat, the grammar was convoluted and needlessly fancy in my humble opinion. It made the legal contents that much harder to decipher.  
I borrowed some of my new expertise to fight through the contract and after a good 2 hours came to the conclusions that a) it was fine and I could sign it and b) I would never want to sit through this kind of torture again.  
If this was part of my future I would hire a capable secretary for this horse manure.

Slowly and rubbing my eyes tiredly I approached the desk.  
"Could I borrow that for just a second?" I asked the busy man, now having an entirely new type of respect for him.

"Certainly." He finished his sentence on paper and handed the writing utensil over.  
A quick dip into the ink and a flourish of my hand and it was done.

I was now officially a royal researcher, with all duties and privileges.

I handed the quill back with a tired smile.  
"Ah yes, thank you and if I may say so, good luck in your new position, captain."

"Thank you, seneschal." I gave the man a slight bow and left without further comment.

Outside I stretched my arms and suppressed a yawn. My day was still not over yet.  
I had lost a bit of time here at the estate, but at least my business was done now.  
Outside the sky was turning yellow and orange. The afternoon sun had dipped just low enough to shine directly over the rooftops of the taller houses.

It was comfortably pretty in its own way.

Without hurry I wandered off in the direction of the chantry building.  
It was in fact not that hard to find.  
It stood tall and proud, a building of yellow sandstone and red chantry banners.

The gate was manned by 4 Templars and the courtyard, which was filled with tiny red flowers, was filled with the voice of 2 chanters.  
I stopped one moment to enjoy the sight of the tiny red blossoms and the sound of the synchronized chanting.

While I never really agreed with the actions of the institution that is the chantry, I did not dislike the idea of the chant of light.

Many of its verses reminded me of earthly religions, which I was more familiar with.

Stepping into the chantry was a bit like stepping inside a different dimension.

The entire place had a different vibe. Almost like a tangible serenity. It was a balm upon the harried spirits of men and women coming to pray here.

This experience reminded me of my vacations to Italy. My father had insisted we do some cultural things as well as relaxing and so we visited several domes and cathedrals.

Even people with no clue about religion or people with vastly different believes can still appreciate the architecture, the care and love and the effect of such places.

This chantry was much the same… and who knows maybe there was a maker. Who am I to judge? Just looking at my case… who if not a Supreme Being could have dumped the soul of a dead person into a different universe?

In order to fit in I made my way along the aisles and past the candles toward the big statue of blessed Andraste. For some reason the picture of her in a white dress and a serene smile did not fit her. To me she was more like a Jeanne D'Arc.  
Fearless in the face of opposition. Faith had guided her and love and no small amount of desperation I imagine.

The people of Thedas called her a prophet in this age, but she had also been a warrior and a leader of legion.

I was mighty curious how she really had lived and fought. What had been her motivations and her guidelines? Had she known what they would call her after her death?  
She had led a rebellion, had revolutionized the world of men and had paid a hefty prize.  
Her name and deeds lived on. Her promises and words had been used for good and ill.

Arguably I was here to attempt a very similar, very stupid thing. Rebellion and revolution was my goal. Although to be fair I hoped it would be a silent and mostly non-violent one.  
If I would succeed what would happen to me? Would I be hunted down? Burned on a pyre? Would the elves sing songs about me or would they revile me as they did the Dread Wolf?

A shiver ran through me at those thoughts and I turned my gaze up onto Andraste's face.  
"We are not so dissimilar you and I." I whispered to no one in particular.

Reluctantly I tore my gaze from her face and let it wander around the room.  
Many people were kneeling with their heads bowed, praying.  
Some seemed calm, others more desperate.

Oh how nice it must be to believe in a higher power so faithfully. To gain unconditional love and comfort from an unending being. To give away responsibility to an unrelated force outside of your control. I wished them all the best, but such a life was not for me.

I could not accept preordained fates or destinies. I would not lose control of and over my own life, not again. And I certainly would shoulder all the responsibility for my actions, no matter how hard that might become.  
I owed it to myself and to those whose lives I would change, for better or worse.

I left the chantry then, but I was very glad I had made the trip.  
It reminded me of the fact that no matter my grand designs and my prophetic knowledge… I was still just a person. I was neither fighting for good nor evil. I was fighting for myself, for what I believed was right.  
Many people will disagree and say I will lead others into ruin, while others may celebrate my actions. I could not let that stop me. I needed to act or I would regret having done nothing. I would look back to this point ten years, twenty years from now and I would drown in an ocean of 'could have been' and 'should have been' and 'had I only'.  
I did not want to be that person.

The evening air was cold on my face and brought me out of my internal musings and back to reality.  
With a start I realized that it was already sundown and I had spent more time in the chantry then I had realized.

Now I needed to hurry. With a start I jogged down the cobbled streets in the direction of the market, to pick up my backpack. I made it in the nick of time. The stalls had mostly disappeared, which made me realize what an enormous area the market actually was.  
The leather wares store was closing up when I raced up to the door.

Luckily I was not too out of breath and mentioned my previous purchase to the two young lads who helped brining in the boxes from the stall.  
One of them hollered for the owner, which turned out to be the Santa/Blackwall fellow from earlier today.  
He looked at me and nodded and disappeared back inside.  
I could only assume he would return with my pack, even though it was odd and uncomfortable being left to stand outside a half open shop door.

I heard his steps before the door opened. He looked me up and down and handed me my pack. I had paid for it this morning so I was about to leave when he told me to put it on first and if I did not want to give it a good look. He shook his head mumbling about young lasses being too trusting and nobody taking time to appreciate his craft anymore.

It honestly made me feel guilty so I gave it a good look.

It was very nice. Without my asking he had added tiny vines and flowers to the leather bands. The inside was spacious and had several divisions. The outside had three side pockets, one in the central back and two to the sides.

When I put it on it fit perfectly. I tied the straps across my waist and across my chest. It was perfect and I told him so with a smile on my face, which he mirrored. He then wished me a good evening and asked me to come back if I ever needed something again and disappeared into his store.

This was it. My shopping trip/ make over was done. I had new outfits, new healing equipment, new jewelry, a better pack and new armor was already commissioned from Wade and would be ready when I returned to Vigil's Keep.  
I had signed my new working contract and I would start on my research tomorrow. There was only one more thing left to do and that was arranging the help for Velanna's mission.

With purposeful strides I made my way down to the docks once more.

While it would not be hard to find a mercenary company, it would be hard finding the right one.  
It would not do to hire thugs, who would run away with my gold or cowards, who would run at the first sight of the drakes.  
I needed a company with a good resume and a fair leader. This endeavor would likely take a while so I decided to eat supper in one of the taverns I would check.

The first two were a complete failure. While one of them looked outwardly friendly, I could feel his dishonesty and malicious intent. The other made my skin crawl and had me looking over my shoulder in paranoia for the next hour. He refused to take me seriously and kept undressing me with his eyes.

With a sigh and now hungry and thirsty I made my way into the next establishment.

As I sat at the bar and ate a surprisingly good stew with fish I rethought my approach. Obviously I had gone about this the wrong way. You do not simply walk up to hose people… maybe I should get a recommendation as well. It certainly could not hurt.  
So I stopped the bartender and asked him his opinion on the local mercs. He gave me and honest enough answer and send me to another establishment, a bar on the eastern side, which was the meeting place of three different, highly qualified companies. One of them would surely be around.

I thanked the man and left a generous tip.

The bar was harder to find than I first guessed, especially because it had started to rain.

I saved myself from more deluge and stumbled into the smoke filled room.  
A few gazed my way, but I was left to my own devices. Must be some kind of policy around here to avoid pissing off the wrong guy or gal.

I repeated my question and answer session with the dwarf at the bar.  
He pointed out to me that the upper floor was currently reserved for the Valo-Kas.

A Tal-Vashoth Merc Company that worked jobs in Ferelden, Orlais and the Free Marches.

They had apparently just returned from a job in the northern Frostbacks and were celebrating their money away.  
Why they had booked the entire upper floor became obvious the moment I laid eyes on them… All of them were Kossith, horned grey giants several heads taller than me.

In that moment, despite my confidence in my skills, I felt overwhelmed.

However if I wanted to hire this band of sell swords I could not show any intimidation on my part. It would only make price negotiation more difficult.  
I made my way over to the long table they had put in the middle of the room. Someone must have shared a very entertaining story or joke, the whole table was roaring with laughter.  
To get the attention of the crowd I knocked on the table twice.

It got me some attention at least.  
"Evening ladies and gents." I smirked at the half drunk collection of Tal-vashoth.

In return I received a lot of hollering and even a cat whistle.

With my luck they probably mistook me for a waitress or some sort of planned entertainment.

Urgh, I hated drunk men!

"Looking for the Valo-Kas…" I trailed of when one of them got into my face.  
"I'll show you my Valo-kas." He said with a lopsided smirk.  
The table howled with laughter.  
This was a joke that went over my head and I hated it when I was made fun of.  
I growled at the merc in response, but before I could get aggressive I was waved close by a sober looking Vashoth.

In the very fitting words of Sera: Woof!  
She looked absolutely gorgeous. Tanned slightly grey skin, muscular build, but not overly so. Her horns were the twisted Aries-type. Her eyes were sharp and seemed to analyze me as I approached. I immediately felt a sort of Kin-ship with this lady.

"Well you found the Valo-Kas, sweetheart. You look like a client so I thought I should talk to you before you eviscerate Kaariss for his bad joke." Her voice was deep and smoky.

"I appreciate it. To be honest the joke went over my head anyway." I admitted bitterly.

"Easily explained: Valo-Kas means Great sword…so" she left me to the interpretation.

In response I face palmed and sighed. Men are always the same. No matter the origin, all of them have the potential to be perverts.

"I see you got it. Do not worry. For all their posturing they know when to draw the line and if not I remind them of their place in the company."  
She leaned back in her chair with an air of confidence bordering superiority.

"So are you the leader of this band?" I had to be sure.  
"Yes. The name's Shokrakar. But most of these drunkards call me Boss and I'm fine with that." The grin that stretched across her face was disconcerting.  
Here was a woman who enjoyed and reveled in her power over others. I would have to be careful with her.

"Are you busy at the moment or are you for hire?"  
"You got a job for us? Interesting, never met an elf with the means or need for a merc company."  
"Trust me I have enough coin. And the job is dangerous, if not over long." I leaned back and looked her over as if finding her wanting.  
She showed no outward reaction but bristled at my nonverbal implication.

"Mine is the best company from here to the Hunterfell. We have succeeded in high-risk missions where others ran with their tails between their legs." She roared and got a lot of loud agreement from her company.  
"If you think you can handle it, perfect. Who should I talk to about the details?"  
Only now she noticed I had set her up.  
Instead of being pissed she smiled.  
"Our contract expert is drunk under the table, but you can go to talk to Adaar. She is young, but clever and talented. She's your man." She gestured to another female Kossith.

This one had more armor like clothes and straight horns, much like a dragon. One of them must have broken off during a fight and had been reattached with a band of metal.

Her skin was darker and of a more warmer grey tone than Shok's.

"Much obliged, Boss." I said with a smirk, this reminded me of Bull and his company.

She waved me off and tried to drag the drunk merc out from under the table.

When I made my way over, Adaar looked up from her drink.  
"Boss send you over for a job?" Her voice was deep like Shok's, but much smoother.  
"Yes, she said you would be the one to talk to about negotiating the parameters and fees."  
"Whoa there. Careful with all the big words. You might give one of my friends a headache with them." She grinned and gave the man next to her a push. He promptly fell of his chair and crashed onto the floor.

"They're hilarious when drunk, but getting them sober tomorrow is gonna be a bitch."  
"I can imagine." My face scrunched up involuntarily at the thought of a band of sweaty, grumpy, hung over Tal-vashoth.  
"Come on let's talk somewhere more quiet."

I followed Adaar into a booth on the far side of the room.  
"Have a seat. I'll get us a few drinks and a candle." Adaar walked off to do just that and left me to my thoughts. Somehow the name Adaar was familiar, but I could not put my finger on it. Sooner than I expected the Tal-Vashoth returned.

"Here you go. One of the least offensive drinks in the establishment."  
She put down a pint in front of me and smiled good-naturedly as she sat down opposite me.

I sniffed at the drink.  
Some sort of Cider, fruity, thinned out with water and not poisoned.  
Tentatively I took a sip and found it pleasant enough to drink.

"There you go. Not bad?" she took several gulps.

"Had better, had worse." I shrugged and returned her grin.

"Now down to business. You said you had a job for us and you came looking for us specifically, right?"

"Correct. I came here by recommendation. My job has the potential to be a boing pick up and escort mission, but it can get very risky very quickly."

"Care to elaborate?" Adaar raised her eyebrow in askance. My formulation did leave room for imagination.  
"My research assistant needs an escort to the Dragonbone wastes. There she will pick up a magical artifact. From there she and the artifact need to travel to an outpost south of Redcliff. Needless to say I wish my assistant and the artifact to remain intact."

Adaar took a while to think this over.

"What problems do you foresee and what level of combat proficiency does your assistant have?"

More details meant they could negotiate for more coin. On the other hand they would be better prepared for their job and Velanna would be safer.

"The Dragonbone wastes are notorious for the presence of dragonlings and drakes, as well as cultists. There is a creature guarding the artifact, which can give you a lot of trouble, but I defeated it before and I can give you a full run down of its capabilities and weaknesses. As for my assistant…"

I took another sip of the cider to wet my throat and create a little suspense.  
"…she is a Dalish mage and a Grey Warden with a lot of combat experience. You will find her fire power a helpful addition to your team. She won't get in the way."

"The list of beasts is impressive. The Boss will like it and so will the others. The transport though..." She paused to rub her chin. Adaar was very expressive, much more so in comparison to her Qunari kin.

"What exactly is the artifact? Is it breakable?"

"It is a mirror, but it is protected by barriers. Still it would do not to hit it with a Warhammer or mace." O-oh, my sarcasm was showing again.

"Just checking. So we would need a cart and a horse for transport or something."  
I cut her off with a quick slashing hand gesture.

"No need. There will be a cart and horse ready when you pick up my assistant at Vigil's Keep."

"This a Grey Warden operation?" she chugged the rest of her ale.  
"No. I just happen to work for them at the moment."

"This seems like a very good contract. I am sure the troupe will be happy with it. I will ask my Boss how much she wants to charge. How will you pay?"

"In coin. One third now and the rest after delivery. Should the artifact be damaged or my assistant be severely injured I will reserve the right to dock some payment."

"Sounds reasonable enough. Let me just confirm it with Shokrakar."

I nodded and finished my drink while Adaar went and spoke to her company leader.

From my vantage point I watched as both of them whispered and gestured wildly. Shokrakar had a borderline dangerous smile on her face and wrote down a few things into a notebook. Adaar came back with the ripped out page.  
"Here is everything you need to know about the pricing."

The page had several numbers on it. It was less than expected, but more than I hoped for. Might as well go all in.

"This seems appropriate. Tell Shokrakar you guys are hired and I will pay commission if you bring back some dragon bones and scales to the Keep when you are done." I held out my hand.

"Will do. Pleasure doing business…" Adaar had a huge grin on her face, after all I just signed her and her company a huge paycheck.

"Sylvanavir, Sylva will do fine."

We shook on the offer and went back to the party table.

Before I left I told Shok to expect the first payment to arrive via courier.

In response she shouted to the table that I was paying for the companies next drinks and I got a roaring applause for it.

With a wave of my hand and a wry smile I said my farewell.

It had turned dark outside and I was glad for my slightly enhanced nocturnal sight.  
Quick steps through the shadows carried me back to the estate.  
It had been an eventful day despite my plan to relax a little. I was nothing if not productive.  
For tomorrow I asked the staff for an early breakfast and three messages to be delivered.

One to arrange the down payment for the Valo-Kas, the second to inform Velanna of the impending mission and another to let her majesty know I would be gone.

Having written my letters I fell into bed and was asleep the moment my head hit the pillow.


	10. Some Arson and gaining minions

**A/N**

 **I AM BACK… from the dead. Sorry for my long absence I had some personal drama to deal with…I won't bore you with my baggage so… On with the story we go!**

My plan for an early breakfast was going just fine, but my silent departure was thwarted by a runner.  
The steward must have gotten my letter yesterday night. How did I figure this out? This morning I received three letters in return, all of which bore the royal seal of Ferelden.  
One of them was a letter of introduction for the assembly in Orzammar, one was for the circle of magi and the last was a stack of promissory notes (an early form of paper based money).  
This guy was good. He had thought of everything…

After some fruit and bread for breakfast I grabbed my new cloak and backpack and left the estate. The city was dark still. In the pre-dawn hours, the sun was not yet visible as I navigated the streets of Denerim.

I had enjoyed my visit to the capital and resolved to explore more of it once I came back. There were too many secrets and opportunities still left for me to discover.

The gate guards looked at me with suspicion until I showed them the royal seal.  
It got me some raised eyebrows, but they let me pass without much trouble thereafter.

My first point of interest on this journey would be Soldiers Peak.  
The old Warden base had been the site of some truly horrifying and yet fascinating research. With any luck I could still find left over research notes.

Admittedly I was a lazy sort of traveler. All of the walking was totally unappealing to me. I was looking forward to the day I could portal from one point in Thedas to the next within a day. I loved magic!  
Until that day I would go for the slightly more convenient way of transport: Wolf sprint.

I walked down the main road until I was out of sight of the gates. Then I skipped into the bushes and thickets on the north side.  
When I was sure I would not be visible I undid my backpack straps, rolled up my cloak and attached it to my pack, dropping the bundle on the floor.  
My transformation was as smooth and disorienting as ever.

I shook my head and adjusted to the new scale of olfactory input.  
The creatures of the wilds around me reacted with sudden panic to the new predatory presence in their woods.

It did not bother me much. I snapped up my bundle and let it hang from some of my teeth, before I started my way west, north-west at a reasonable pace.

If my geographical understanding of Ferelden was accurate I would only need 2 days to reach Soldiers Peak. It was a Mountain fortress in the lands east of Highever.

With its position it would be easy to spot, or so I thought.

As it turned out it would take me a bit longer. A day into my trip the weather turned.  
The sky turned grey and torrents of rain were unleashed from above.

Scent trails were washed away. Vision was only possible in a 2 meter radius and the ground turned into a sludgy mud bath.

Within half an hour I turned from majestic white wolf into Sylva the swamp-monster.

My beautiful fur was brown and grey and filled with sticks and leaves, which had stuck to the mud. From time to time I stood still in the open terrain, using the rain as an instant shower.

The waterlogged fur was clean but heavy.

In the end I decided to slow down my sprint to a walk and find shelter.

When I found a nice, dry cave to crawl into I remembered my backpack!

Please, please, please be okay….  
The water barely got inside, it was marvelous. Thank the spirits for oiled leather!

There was really nothing for me to do, so I laid down onto the cave floor and watched the rain from the entrance.  
It took quite a while for the storm outside to calm down to a drizzle.  
I really wanted to get this part of my trip done, so I decided to run despite the leftover mud and rain.

On a hunch I decided to focus some Mana onto my paws.

I know I was not a water-walking ninja, but maybe the principle of energy barriers would work the same way.

Carefully I took a few steps onto the sticky ground to find that my paws did not sink into the mud…as much.  
My progress was still hampered, but at least I could run.

The next day was filled with me running, drinking from clean streams and occasional snatching a rabbit.  
Soldiers Peak fortress was not hard to find. It jutted out of the ground like an ugly splinter.

Even from the distance it exuded a sense of foreboding and ill will.  
Something was very wrong about this place and it sent my senses into overdrive. When I tried to scan the place with my aura I immediately wished I hadn't.

I was overwhelmed with the lingering feelings of pain, sorrow and hopeless rage. The emotions had been so strong and the death count so high it had ruptured the Veil and burned after images into the physical plane.

With a shiver I recalled my aura and wrapped it around me like a blanket. It would not do to get distracted or lost in the turmoil of the dead.  
My mind was made up: I would not even attempt to sleep anywhere near the fortress.

In the future I would avoid this location until I found a way to purify it.

There were two ways for me to reach the top. Either I would scale the mountain side or I could try my luck in the tunnels below. Neither option was very appealing.

Climbing a wet, slick and rocky mountain side seemed a tad bit suicidal to me so I went with option B: the tunnels.

Before I entered the mining shaft I sent a quick prayer to spirits of guidance and went inside.

The immediate musty smell of basement set my hairs on end.

My delicate canine nose noticed several different nuances of mold, mushrooms and fungi.

Reluctantly I moved onwards, I would just have to live with this smell for the next hours. Charting a path through the labyrinth of tunnels was challenging. More often than not I would discover a dead end. Sometimes I went round in circles and only noticed the third or fourth time.

Eventually I caught a whiff of fresh air. From that point onwards I followed my nose out of the underground maze.  
I reemerged from the ground and immediately shook myself. My hope was to rid myself of the musty smell, but it was in vain.

With a shudder I transformed back into my bipedal form and observed my surroundings.

A small road led up to the portcullis of the fort. The stone-masonry, despite its age, was spotless. Build by dwarves, is my guess.

I shouldered my backpack and made my way up to the entrance.

The gate stood wide open.

The warden party had entered, cleaned house and left the place. Smashed and slashed skeletons littered the ground in the inner courtyard.  
My magic almost vibrated with the amount of pressure I could feel from the spiritual realm. It is fortunate that Cousland and Co. had already destabilized the fade-portals from before, otherwise this would be a true nightmare.

As much as I would have loved to just skip this level, I could not risk leaving valuable information behind.  
The fortress walls stood silent and undamaged, but structural weaknesses of the buildings and rooms inside had led to cave-ins and broken doorways. My way through the complex was a slow and steady walk over and around piles of rubble.

I found a relatively intact library, however none of the books were in any way salvageable.  
The cold and damp had destroyed the paper and he ink thoroughly.  
Close by I found the office of the former Warden commander Dryden. The room looked like it had been hit by a hurricane.

Several hallways further inwards I gained access to stairs leading to the lower floors.  
If my memory serves correctly, this is where I would find Avernus Laboratory.

While his research had been highly unethical and slightly primitive, he had still gotten feasible results.  
With any luck, some of his research notes had been better preserved. He had been a mage after all and they tend to be more finicky about the safety of research documents.

I noticed my imminent arrival by the scent of rust and left over chemicals.  
In case of the lab equipment the cold and the damp must have helped to keep some of them … well not really fresh, but maybe usable?  
Some ceramic jugs still held the scent of alcoholic solutions, while other nameless appliances were rusty and crusted with unmentionable liquids.  
Cages at the far side of the room had left over blood stains on the bars and on the floor.

The entire lab held a feeling of absolute misery.

It made me feel sick in a very physical way.

Why did I do this to myself?  
Why?

On a desk in the corner I spied some empty vials and two notebooks, filled with handwritten scribbles. This is what I was here for!  
I pocketed both books and left the room through a door on the left.  
What greeted me beyond the door was a vast hall.

The ceiling was two stories high and the room itself could have fitted two basketball courts.

Both sides of the hall were covered in bookshelves and the center held some minerals and cracked gemstones on pedestals.

The far side of the hall was elevated by half a level and seemed to hold altar like structures, which were littered with papers and vials.

Bingo!

Despite my discomfort I took the time to browse through the bookshelves and brought any intact books to the staircase.  
Most of these were historical documents and warden reports. Some few books remained, which discussed topics of blood magic. I pocketed two of the more promising ones after I cut out the paper and gave them a new cover. This way I could read them in public without drawing the ire of literally everyone.

After I had sorted through the books I focused my attention on the upper level.  
I carefully sorted the notes and began to read.  
Avernus had kept meticulous notes on all his experiments and the progress of each subject. Some of his work was absolutely inhumane. At points in his notes his methodology was interrupted by borderline mad ravings.  
The more failures he experienced the madder his subsequent experiments had become.

All this culminated in his deal with demons and his sundering of the Veil.

I was the first to admit that old spirits held a lot of knowledge. And dealing with them can be useful if done sparsely and with care. However Avernus method had all the subtlety of a sledgehammer to the face.  
He had killed the rest of his comrades and used their blood and pain to rip open a hole in the Veil. In his madness he had not even considered which spirits to call for.  
Any and all spirits in close proximity to the tear had been drawn to it, through it and had been corrupted by the overwhelming fear, despair, anger and pain of the dying wardens.

At that point in time Avernus had stopped making concise notes and had drawn confusing diagrams and sketches instead. I stopped reading and took a moment to mentally cope with this horror show.  
When I had calmed down I approached the second altar and looked at his labeled vials and lists of ingredients and recipes.

Avernus had started by using different degrees of blood magic and lyrium on warden and darkspawn blood. He had later mixed the two blood types in different ratios and repeated the experiments. He also had research notes on the different spread of the taint in mage versus non-mage wardens, interesting!

Later in his mad stage he had penned a progression report on the possession of wardens.  
I took out my own research notebook and copied some of his notes and summarized some of his reports as well as a list of his failures.

There would be no human experiments and blood magic in my research!

When I was finished I took one last look around the room, just to make sure I did not miss anything.  
What I did next was an overly emotional, stupid and spontaneous move. And yet it felt immensely satisfying.  
I put my hand on the pile of books and on the bookshelves and set them on fire.  
Every room I came through on my way out was set on fire in some way or another.

When I finally stood outside the portcullis the main complex had started to smoke and the gleam of fire was visible through the shattered windows.

There would be one less place of misery and danger in this country.

The risk of the fire spreading was minimal. The walls around the castle were high, made from stone and currently wet with rain. No trees stood anywhere near the building.

I watched as the fort was consumed by fire. No one could have repaired this place. No one could have made it habitable without still being haunted by previous bloodshed.

Logically I was doing Cousland a favor, but I knew she would not immediately see it as such.

I would deal with the fall out when I hand in my report.

With one last look at the fiery fortress I turned back to the wilds.  
From here it would be equally helpful to visit the circle tower or the dwarven city.  
I walked south for a day in my normal elven form.  
It felt good to stretch my legs and my magical aura, which I had restricted for the entire visit on Soldiers Peak.

While I was very curious about Orzammar, I needed to go over Avernus notes in detail and would like to peruse a wider selection of literature first. Besides I had contacts and friends in the mage tower already and I wanted to check on their progress.  
My mind was made up and so I shifted and ran south and west.  
It did not take long for the area to look familiar. I had been running through here 3 or 4 times already.  
One last leap over these hills and I would be able to see Lake Calenhad.

The closer I got to the tower the more excitement spread through me. Up until now I had primarily worked my magic on instinct and with the help of downloaded memories. Now I got the chance to sit down and work on my understanding of this world's magic.  
I wanted and needed to understand the logic behind it all.

Theories and guesswork would not be sufficient any longer.

My inner nerd trembled with anticipation as I jogged the last few steps through the evergreens of Lake Calenhad's shore.  
Now in my bipedal form, I once more stood on the sandy beach and watched the serene sunset on the other side of the lake. The last light of the day colored the waves in a fiery red orange. Despite their fiercer appearance they gently rolled over the dark sand in a never ending rhythm.

It was very soothing and prepared me for the headache that was bound to come from arguing with the Templar order.

To my surprise the Templar in charge of the boat was the same cookie obsessed idiot form the Origins games.  
I did not remember him from last time, but then I was lost in thought and left the talking to Theron. Once I approached I showed him the letter of introduction with the royal seal and asked for passage.  
He just mumbled something about self-important visitors and shipped me over to the tower.

Two tower guards led me inside to the entrance hall and asked me to wait for the Commander.  
While I waited I checked on the integrity of the Veil. In my absence my glyphs had done their work well. The Fade was always more tangible in places were magic was worked regularly, but at least I had given the tower some protection from the oppressive forces of blood magic and demonic influences.

The metallic clunking of armored boots on the stone floor alerted me to the immediate arrival of more Templars.  
In deed Commander Greg… something appeared with two knights and one mage apprentice.

"Good Evening Commander. I hope you and your charges are doing well." My voice echoed through the entry hall.

There was no sense in waiting for him to make the first move. I was no longer under the protection of the Warden Commander and I was technically no longer a captain either, but they did not know that.  
As long as I portrayed a position of strength I should be able to deal with any uppity bucket heads.

"Ah yes, Captain Sylva, was it? I seem to recall you having been our guest a while back. As you can see the tower is well under control now. The repair works have been going well."

He waved off the two guards that came with him.

"I doubt you came here just to ask about the reconstruction though." His brow furrowed and he looked at me expectantly.

"Very true. I was send here by her majesty to do some research. I have all the relevant documents if you and Irving wish to read up on those." I waved around my letter of introduction.

"It seems all is in order. My guess is that you will require accommodation and entry to the library?"

I nodded.

"I would like to make the tower my temporary HQ. I am sure I will find much promising material here, however I also have a trip to the city of Orzammar planned. Occasionally I will need to report to Denerim as well. Would this be acceptable?"  
"I see no reason why it would not be, as long as the research does not endanger the tower inhabitants and is in line with the chantry's teachings. I will need those documents you spoke of and I shall talk to the senior enchanter about this."

Carefully I unfolded the letter from Queen Cousland addressed to the Circle tower and handed it over.

"Faris will show you to your guest quarters."

Faris was the young mage apprentice, which had stood silent and observing until now.

"Mistress Sylva. I remember you from some of the lessons on barriers. It is a pleasure to have you as our guest again. I shall show you where you can rest your head. The journey from Denerim to Calenhad must have tired you."

"You are very well spoken Faris. My apologies that I had not in fact recognized you from my classes. I would welcome the rest and respite of my new quarters. Lead on."

On our way up the tower I gave Faris a brief explanation of what I hoped to find in the library. He told me that I might need a bit of time and patience for while the reparations had gone well, the library was still slightly unorganized.  
He also warned me of unpleasant dreams although they had lessened as of 2 months ago.  
I took this as another good sign that my effort to strengthen the veil integrity of the tower had worked.

Before he left me at my guest room door I inquired about my two favorite, inquisitive apprentices, Lysas and Neria.  
Both had done very well in their studies since I left. Their determination to improve had inspired the senior enchanters to test them. Both had been awarded a higher rank within the circle hierarchy.  
I felt a sense of pride for their accomplishments.

I thanked Faris for his escort and information and turned in for the day.

It was admittedly early, but I had been on the road for a while and the experience of Soldier's Peak still grated on my sensitive nerves.  
Without much delay I slipped into the Fade and found myself enjoying simple dreams of running free through endless emerald glades. If I had to venture a guess I'd say my prolonged travel in my animal form had influenced my dreams.  
Whatever the case I awoke refreshed and content as small rays of sunlight flittered through the high window of my room.

After a quick wash and a change of my wardrobe into the more comfortable loose tunic, I exited my room.  
Adopting a leisurely pace I made my way down to the mess hall and found most of the apprentices and mages already seated and in small debates over breakfast.  
As soon as I walked in I was waved at by former students of mine.  
News traveled fast as lightning within the walls of the tower.

Sitting alone would not be an option, I decided. It would simply sent the wrong message.  
With a slight smile on my face and a blossoming warmth of fondness in my chest I made my way towards the combination of shocking red and raven black hair I associated with my two favorite magelings.  
Neria had waved most enthusiastically and seemed to preen when I made my way over. Lysas shook his head, equal parts amused and embarrassed, going by his smile and slight blush.

"Sylva! You came back! Are you here to give more lectures?" Neria immediately started as I sat down.  
"Neria… let her eat breakfast before you ambush her. I am sure she will make time for questions later." Lysas mumbled, exasperation in his voice.  
Turning to me he added: "It is nice to have you back, Lady Sylva. We are looking forward to showing you our progress."  
"I am sure you all did splendidly. Faris told me you two had gained a new rank since last I visited, congratulations."  
Their ear tips turned red from the praise.

If that was all it took, the teachers here really did not do their job too well.  
Positive acknowledgements and verbal praise went a long way to motivating students and encouraging advancement.

My inner self shook her head in admonishment of the educational system, or lack thereof. Another mental note to add when building my nation: make sure to add mandatory education and teacher screening to the growing list of concerns.

"Before anyone interrupts my breakfast with their enthusiasm…" I continued with a nod to Lysas, "I am mainly here to avail myself of the tower library. My focus is on research this time. I will need to leave occasionally, making trips to Denerim and Orzammar. However I do not see why I should not be able to fit in the occasional lecture or group discussion into my schedule. If and when that happens I will let Irving know to announce it to the relevant people."

With that I focused on my breakfast and let the news spread from table to table.  
After a short pause normal conversation started up again, ranging from gossips about relationships to class assignments and projects.

After a hearty meal I excused myself from the table. The hall had emptied out substantially by then. Classes must have started.  
I let my feet carry me up to the library levels and almost ran into one of the retainers.

Such occurrences would be more common as I had restricted my magical aura to a bubble of a 2 meter radius. While not entirely comfortable it was preferable to the feeling the tranquil and Templars gave me.

Last time I was a guest here I had made the mistake of stretching my aura to feel for fade anomalies and ended up almost pulling my hair out in distress. The mages had flickered like candles in the dark, they could have been, should have been bonfires, stars in my vision. That alone was sad to watch.  
But the hollow wrongness of the tranquil and the icy yearning echoes of the old songs coming from the Templars had been overwhelming.

How people could exist like this was beyond me. Their inability to see the world as I did was a blessing in disguise for them.  
Subsequently I had resolved to restrict my presence to my own person and students in very close proximity.

The tranquil I had run into blinked up at me impassively and tried to apologize for being in the way, which I waved of immediately.

Rather than focusing on the run in I asked if he could direct me to the parts of the library which held literature concerning the Fade, basic theories on the workings of magic and Lyrium uses.

Helpfully he escorted me to the relevant wing and left me with a slight bow.

I spied an unoccupied table next to the wall and decided to claim it as my working space.  
Several minutes after browsing the different sections and bookshelves my table was loaded with three separate stacks of books. One of the librarians had quirked and eyebrow at the size of them. In response I shrugged and told her not to concern herself, I would put everything back into place myself. Once I was finished that is.

With a stack of parchment and a notebook at the ready I immersed myself in my literature.  
It was truly a blessing that I was a fast reader by nature.

I could finish a moderately sized book in around 3 to 4 hours without problems.  
All the while I would take notes for my research and separately note down good references for future educational purposes.

In this way I worked myself through the first stack of books within the span of 3 days, only stopping to eat, bathe or sleep.  
In my old life I would have gotten stir crazy by now. Admittedly I missed the feeling of wind and sun on my face, but I forced myself to focus.

Until this point I had remained largely undisturbed.

Day 4 marked a change.

Neria's patience had run thin enough by this point that she had approached me boldly during lunch time and had physically dragged me off for a luncheon with Lysas.  
I let it happen, but raised an eyebrow at her physical forwardness.

"What?" she had snapped, "It's not as if I could have argued you out of your solitary book fortress."  
"You have a point." I admitted and proceeded to enjoy the break from my work.

"So. What is your mad genius cooking up this time Sylva?" Neria started the conversation after the meal.

"Mad genius?" I smirked. I secretly loved the title.  
"Do you deny it? You are as mad as you are brilliant and blasphemous." Lysas added.

"My dear magelings. Blasphemy would require me to have been Andrastian at some point in my life, which I have not." My chin tilted up in challenge.

"So you agree with the first two attributes." Neria cackled in triumph. Let her have it.

"Certainly." I agreed with as much pomp as I could muster.

After a pause we all dissolved in some laughter.

"So will you answer or do we have to puzzle this out by ourselves again?" Lysas turned semi-serious once more.

"I thought I made it clear during my first day: I am here to do research. Very formal, very official, mind you." I tilted my head quizzically.

"Researching what? And for whom? And more importantly… can we join in?"

Neria was bouncing up and down in her seat. Where did she get all that energy from?

"Can you not tell us?" my raven haired protégée leaned forward in anticipation of my answer.

Those two always so eager and so much brighter than the rest. Was this in response to my nurturing them or had they been naturally more aware than the rest. Who could tell at this point?

"I can tell you. Though you might not find it as fascinating as my previous lectures." I sat back and ordered my thoughts.  
"I am currently researching the blight and possible cures by order of her majesty Queen Cousland."

Before I continued I let that information sink in.

"I will look into warden history, reports of the Legion of the Dead, maps of the spread of the Blight throughout Thedas and in the deep roads. I need to collect samples of blood and tissue from flora and fauna effected by blight sickness, as well as from different wardens.  
Also I need to get some research material commissioned by the dwarves of Orzammar."

"If that is the case, why look into Lyrium and basic magical theory?" Neria smirked at me like she had caught me stealing from a cookie jar.

"Admittedly. I am still figuring out the limits and applications of magic in this age. By now I assume you have dissected my knowledge and behavior enough to notice… I am not originally from here."  
"You are speaking in a temporal sense, are you not?" the raven haired mage whispered.

"This seems more and more like a conspiracy." Giggled the redhead.

"My spirit has been imprisoned before the first age of man and has been released just before the 5th Blight. The Veil was an unforeseen complication, which I am most curious and unhappy about." I could not stop myself from frowning.

"We had already guessed at something similar. After the rumors of Dalish elves who have rediscovered the immortality of the ancient elves… You are one of the originals though?"  
"I have not survived the age-long imprisonment unchanged, but I retained a lot of my knowledge and attitude."

"So now you are looking into the Veil because it is blocking your magic in ways you had never experienced. Makes you wonder how it feels, a world without a Veil." Neria got a dreamy look on her face. I nodded at her train of thought.  
"If at all possible I would like to loosen it up or take it down altogether. You might not believe me, but magic was everywhere and it came to us as natural as breathing. I wish to go back to this state."

Lysas sighed. "A place where magic is part of everyday life and not something to be feared. It almost seems too good to be true."

Neria interjected almost immediately. "But it's definitely worth working towards. Just thinking about it… How many of us mages just take the Veil and origin of Magic for granted? And how many are being damned by the chantry for even asking questions of origin?"

"In any case: if I wish to educate everyone in matters of magic regardless of their own magical potential, I will need a proper comprehensive lesson plan. I need literature reviews and reading lists and references for future schools and academies. If you wish to help me with these menial tasks, be my guest."

"It would be interesting to visit the shaperate." Lysas said almost dreamily.  
"Oh here we go, Lysas the bookworm and history fanatic is hooked already. So tell me _Lady Sylva_ what will you teach us in exchange for our help?" The cheeky red-head looked at me expectantly.

Clever little thing. "Quid pro quo, hmh?" I nodded at her.  
"Was that ancient tevene?" Lysas mumbled, brought out of his stupor.

"What would you like to learn?" both perked up at my offer.

"I always wanted to know how to shapeshift. You seem to do it so effortlessly. Can you teach me?" the studious elf looked at me hopefully.  
"Certainly Lysas." I was happy to see someone other than me, interested in shapeshifting.

Neria considered a moment.

"I want to learn more about battle magic. My talents are in the direction of elemental energies, but I have no practice or combat experience. Could you train me?"

"I doubt we will have any realistic battle encounters within the tower. However I could teach you how to manage battlegrounds and how to read warriors movements. In short I can teach you strategy and tactics. Will that suffice?"

"Sure." Neria nodded.

"Perhaps I can sweeten the deal… I will speak to Irving to get you to come along as my research assistants. You could leave the tower for a time…"  
"We could?!"  
"Fantastic!"

"No guarantees." I tried to stop their over enthusiasm, but it was difficult.

"So I will talk to the senior enchanter and you two busy bees will help me with my research?"

"Sure. I would like to come with you to Orzammar. Warden History sounds fascinating…"  
"Yeah, sure, absolutely riveting." Neria rolled her eyes, "I would rather help with lesson plans. I really enjoy helping the young kids and apprentices, so you know…" she shrugged her shoulders and blushed a little.

She looked at me with interest, but did not comment.

"Sounds like you have even more specific ideas about your state." Lysas tilted his head.  
"Certainly. I have made some plans for governmental and educational organization. Furthermore I have an idea for gaining a financial capital, both for the national bank and the financing of most building materials…" I trailed off, noticing the odd looks the two exchanged.

"What?!"

"Do you remember, last time you asked us if we would be willing to join in your crazy venture." Neria asked crossing her arms in front of her.

"Both of us thought about it for quite a while after you left. It seemed so …" he trailed of at a loss of words.

"Big, impossible, blasphemous, dangerous, fun…" the red-head had no problem providing some colorful adjectives. They really worked well together.

"Yes thank you Neria." Lysas frowned at her.

"In the end I wished I had more information. I needed to know if it could become reality. Now I know for sure. You do not doubt. You plan and become active and stay patient. If anyone can do it, you can and I…"

"We!"

"Yes, we want to help." Neria nodded towards Lysas in apology.

I stood from the table.  
This was… unexpectedly pleasant news.

Before I could even breathe my next question I was again interrupted by Lysas.

"Before you ask if we are sure. Yes. We absolutely are."

"I…thank you, you two. It means a lot. To have some people who listen and believe. It makes things more real for me as well as fun."

A shy smile appeared on my face.

In response these little lovely imps grinned like cats that got the cream.

"You two stop smirking and get to work. Lysas look for books which have info on the formation and quantification of the veil. Get going on compiling some notes, pay close attention to repeating patterns and themes. Neria you could start with school plans. We will need lessons in basic math, basic literature and basic magical concepts. Try to keep an open mind, avoid chantry scripture and censoring."

Still smirking those two… "Hop to it!"

Walking back to my fortress, I sat back down in my corner and took a moment to enjoy this feeling.

My plan was still eons away from completion, but I had made some wonderful, real connections… the first buds of my network had started to emerge.

The lady, my mother figure; Theron, my little adopted brother; Velanna my Dalish research confidant; Elissa Cousland, my queen and now Neria and Lysas my two fabulous apprentices.

I felt … warm.

After thoroughly enjoying this glee I refocused on my work.  
I did promise to come up with a lesson for the kids and the older apprentices, so I frisked my available memories and decided on a few topics.

Three hours later I had several lesson plans, some material, references and homework set up. I hoped it would be enough and trudged to bed.

When I entered the Fade this night I was pleasantly surprised by the library that surrounded me.

Browsing the selection of books I recognized some titles from the physical version of this library that awaited me in the morning.

There were a lot of other titles I had not seen before. My guess was that this Fade based library held representations of old books, which used to be here, but are not anymore.

Only one way to test the quality of these recollections.

At random I drew out three unfamiliar books with the same sort of aura.  
The level of detail in the books was superb. This could not be a collective memory. They tend to get some details mixed up due to the difference in accuracy of memorization.  
Someone was specifically focusing on this knowledge and kept up with reconstructing books of this tower.

"Correct. Your deduction took a little time, but was very accurate." A calm, soothing voice uttered from one side.  
Turning to find the source of said voice I came face to face with a male mage.  
He was of average height, had medium length grey-brown hair, looked about mid-forties age wise and well… he just looked very plain.

Everything was unassuming about him, with one exception: his eyes.

They were steel grey. In stark contrast to his so-so appearance they were sharp and focused.

I would think this was a…

"Spirit. That is also a correct deduction."  
His voice was really nice. It sounded like the audio equivalent of drinking a hot cup of chocolate.

"You have amassed quite an impressive amount of…"

"Knowledge. Yes, that is my purpose."

I think this spirit likes finishing other people's sentences.

"Would it be alright if I came here sometimes? You know to read?"  
"Of course. This is my purpose. This is a library. You can read books here." At this point in our conversation he lost interest in me, turned back to a shelf, took a book out with his right hand and started reading. At the same time he fished out another book from another shelf with his left hand and started filling the empty pages by moving his fingers over the blank paper.

I guess this would be the start of an interesting relationship.

For the rest of the night I sat on one of the conjured chairs and skimmed books on history and architecture and anything else that seemed interesting to me.  
This would be my new me-time. I could do some leisure reading at night and relax here for a while before I have to wake up to work.

With a smile I turned to the next page.


End file.
